TVSquad

(S05E03) Three episodes in and while Top Chef has been fun with really good challenges and interesting food, something is missing. Or maybe it just hasn't simmered to the surface yet. I'm talking about conflict, drama, hatred. Everybody is just too damn happy with each other.

I mean, last night the only nasty interaction was one chef flipping a finger at the other -- which Bravo actually blurred out, give me a break -- and Jamie commenting that she's fed up with Dave. Compared to previous seasons, that's pretty tame. Turn up the heat, guys and gals. Let's see that "too many cooks spoil the broth" energy.

(S05E02) And as the contest resumes, the 17 chefs have now been whittled down to 15 as episode two unfolds. After watching the second installment of Top Chef New York, it's clear this is going to be a good season.

Tough competitors, great location -- and they're using it effectively -- and at least so far, realistic challenges that are testing their mettle.

Interestingly, the chefs haven't figured out that there's strength in numbers. Instead of playing it smart through this week's episode, a couple were downright suicidal in their approach. More on that after the jump.

Back in the suite, Euro-boys Stefan and Fabio have become brothers in arms. Or is the bromance more of a love story? It's hard to tell, but Stefan eyes Fabio as his main competition and they seem to have bonded over the fact that they are the two chefs with accents.

• At 8, ABC has a new Pushing Daisies, then new episodes of Private Practice and Dirty Sexy Money.
• CBS has a new Old Christine, followed by new episodes of Gary Unmarried, Criminal Minds, and CSI: NY.
• NBC has new episodes of Knight Rider, Life, and Law & Order.
• FOX has a new Bones at 8.
• The CW has a new America's Next Top Model at 8, then a new Stylista.
• PBS has a new installment of Monarchy at 8.
• Discovery has two new episodes of Time Warp at 8, followed by new episodes of Mythbusters and Prototype This!
• Also at 8: History Channel has a new Modern Marvels.
• At 9, Lifetime has the movie The Tenth Circle.
• Food Network has the special Dear Food Network: Thanksgiving Desserts at 9.
• Spike has a new UFC Unleashed at 9, followed by a new Ultimate Fighter.
• At 10, Comedy Central has a new South Park at 10, then a new Chocolate News.
• Bravo has a new Top Chef at 10.
• FX has a new Sons of Anarchy at 10.
• A&E has two new episodes of Parking Wars at 10.

Check your local TV listings for more.

After the jump, the late night talk show listings.

(S05E01) When I watch Project Runway, I'm reminded of the fact that I'm no fashion designer. I'd be up a tree if I faced the challenges those contestants face. The same with Top Design, not to mention any of the hair shows. However, Top Chef is a different story. I do cook and every day is a challenge to figure out what to make and how.

So, the return of Top Chef -- season five -- was like greeting an old friend. Here are people I can relate to, even if they have culinary skills that exceed mine.

The new edition is set in New York, a point that was obvious from the start with arrivals not coming via a pedestrian airport. No, here we are at Grand Central Station, a landmark. Then it's onto a ferry to Governor's Island to really get a look at the city.

• At 8, ABC has The CMA Awards.
• CBS has a new Old Christine at 8, followed by new episodes of Gary Unmarried, Criminal Minds, and CSI: NY.
• NBC has new episodes of Knight Rider, Life, and Law and Order.
• FOX has a new Bones at 8.
• There's a new America's Next Top Model on The CW at 8, then a new Stylista.
• PBS has a new installment of Monarchy at 8.
• Discovery has two new episodes of Time Warp at 8, followed by new episodes of Mythbusters and Prototype This!
• Also at 8: TCM has Pat and Mike, then Strangers on a Train.
• At 9, Showtime has a new Inside The NFL.
• Sci-Fi has a new Ghost Hunters at 9, followed by the series premieres of Estate of Panic and Man vs. Mansion.
• At 10, Bravo has the season premiere of Top Chef.
• FX has a new Sons of Anarchy at 10.
• Comedy Central has a new South Park at 10, then a new Chocolate News.
• Also at 10: A&E has two new episodes of Parking Wars.

Check your local TV listings for more.

After the jump, the late night talk show listings.

You know why Rachael Ray is smiling all the time? She's the richest food star in the world. According to the latest Forbes list of top-earning celebrity chefs, Rachael Ray leads the pack. In fact, of the top 10 names, all but two are TV stars.

Therefore, you better believe that all that exposure on Food Network, Bravo, Travel Channel, Fine Living, BBC America, and Fox -- not to mention syndication and appearances on talk shows and demonstrations on the Today Show -- makes a big difference.

Food Network is either creating a new reality food competition program that sounds remarkably like a miniature version of Top Chef or this is the biggest coincidence in the world of cable television. Food Network has put out a casting notice that calls for professional chefs who are interested in testing their skills in the kitchen against other chefs by having their food judged on taste, creativity and presentation by experts.

They're looking for four contestants; each week one will be eliminated till a winner remains. The winner will then be -- wait for it -- top food maker. No, that part I made up. They're not saying what the winner will be called or even what the best chef will win. The details aren't spelled out in the casting notice.

Despite rumors and conspiracy theories about Bravo trying to sabotage Project Runway because the show is leaving them for Lifetime, the premiere had the most viewers for a premiere that the network has ever seen, 2.9 million. That was enough to make Bravo the #1 cable network from 9-10 in all key demographics. And Project Runway was the top ranked cable telecast for the day in adults 18-49.

That's certainly cause for celebration, but there's more good news. The fourth episode of Shear Genius managed a milestone of its own, becoming just the fifth Bravo show to top 2 million viewers for an episode. The others are Queer Eye, Top Chef, Project Runway, and The Real Housewives of Orange County. Completing the trifecta of personal bests, Flipping Out broke a million viewers for the first time.

The success sets the stage for a very interesting ratings drama once Project Runway debuts on Lifetime. Will the fans follow the show to Lifetime? And will the Lifetime audience embrace a show that seems to fit the network's brand about as well as a new season of Queer Eye on Spike? I'd prefer to see it stay at Bravo, but I'm all kinds of curious to watch the change play out.

This is a rather confusing story. Or maybe all of this heat is getting to me and there's obvious point here I'm missing.

Nielsen Media surveyed 82,000 18-49 year-olds (a rather hefty sample), and 75% of the respondents say that Bravo is the most engaging network. Yup, the network of reality shows (is there anything else on the network these days?) holds the attention of that key demographic more than any other channel, network or cable, including runner-up CBS (which got 74%), ABC (73%), The CW (71%), NBC (70%), and FOX (69%).

Bravo's top-rated and highly acclaimed reality food show, Top Chef, has big plans for the fifth season. Like real estate, it's all about location, location, location and Top Chef has chosen a most unique place, somewhere you might not guess in a game of 20 questions. I'm not going to reveal the place until after the jump, because there may be some of you out there that want to be surprised.

Just to recap, Top Chef has already spent seasons in San Francisco, Los Angeles, Miami and Chicago. They've also had special episodes and finales in Napa Valley, Las Vegas, Hawaii and Aspen and San Juan, Puerto Rico. Traveling to interesting and even exotic locales is part of the fun, giving the contestants a chance to incorporate the regional foods and the style of that part of the world.

Okay, if the suspense is getting to you -- I know it is -- go to the jump and see where season five of Top Chef is going to be...

Part Five: The Money Shot

After about an hour and a half of fake fights, thrown tennis balls, and clap after clap after clap, everyone sat down for a Q&A.

The students were able to ask questions of the following three people:

Robert Russel, the aforementioned reality show casting director.

Dave Martin, finalist on season one of Bravo's Top Chef.

Jorge Bendersky, "Dog Stylist" on Animal Planet's Groomer Has It.

I'm going to do something that I haven't done up until this point: report what happened without snarky asides or not-so-subtle digs at the students or organizers. This hour was actually worth the price of admission. If you're someone that is truly interested in the way reality shows work and what they're looking for, the Q&A gave some real insight into the process.

• At 8, FOX has a new So You Think You Can Dance.
• NBC has a new Deal Or No Deal at 8, followed by a new Celebrity Circus.
• At 9, The CW has a new Farmer Wants A Wife.
• At 9:30, HGTV has a new Design on a Dime, then a new House Hunters.
• At 10, TBS has two new episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne.
• Tru TV has the series premiere of Black Gold at 10.
• MTV has a new Real World at 10.
• Also at 10: Bravo has the Top Chef Reunion.
• At 10:30, Comedy Central has a new Mind of Mencia.

Check your local TV listings for more.

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

OK, so auto racing makes it to number one for the second week in a row, but I'm just amazed at the power of SpongeBob SquarePants. Look, it's a great, fun show, but every week it has at least one episode in the top 10, and usually has two or three episodes on the list. Is it that strong with kids or is the talk that adult stoners and gays being really into it true?

1. Sprint Cup Racing (TNT)
2. Monday Night RAW (USA)
3. Monday Night RAW (USA)
4. iCarly (Nickelodeon)
5. Army Wives (Lifetime)
6. In Plain Sight (USA)
7. SpongeBob SquarePants (Nickelodeon)
8. SpongeBob SquarePants (Nickelodeon)
9. Top Chef (Bravo)
10. SpongeBob SquarePants (Nickelodeon)

The first reality show contestant I learned to hate was Puck from the San Francisco season of MTV's The Real World. This was actually before people went on reality shows just to be on television and become some sort of celebrity. Oh, what innocent, fun times those were (and I'm serious - the first few seasons of The Real World were quite good).

Puck was actually OK for several episodes, but then he started with the hateful talk, not getting along with his roommates, and the battles with Pedro (though I have to admit that the thing I disliked most about Puck wasn't any of those things, it was the time he stuck his fingers in the peanut butter - gah). Now TV Guide includes Puck in their list of the top 10 reality TV villains. You can probably guess a few of the others. Spencer Pratt is on there (I had never seen or heard of this guy until Letterman's interview last night), Survivor's Jonny Fairplay, and, of course, Omarosa of The Apprentice.

Anyone missing from this list?

(By the way, it actually hurt a little bit to check the "celebrities" category for this post.)

American Idol does it. So You Think You Can Dance does it. Dancing with the Stars does it. And now, Top Chef will hit the road on a nationwide tour. Top Chef? Really? It's true. Beginning June 21st, the popular Bravo show will embark on a twenty-city tour. The tour will begin on Long Island at the Whole Foods market in Jericho. Top Chef on wheels will feature a customized 18-wheeler semi-truck and "will offer Bravo's passionate fans and cable affiliate partners with the unique opportunity to experience the hit series in their hometowns."

Here's how it will work. In each city, select "chef-testants" from the hit show will do cooking demonstrations, give out gourmet tips, share show secrets and offer food tastings all from the monster truck which includes a state-of-the-art kitchen and can accommodate 38 guests per seating. Every one else can watch from HD screens.

Tour dates are after the jump. Top Chef might be pulling up to a farmers market or food festival near you. What do you think? Does this sound like something you'd go to?