TVSquad

Okay, today we really are having a field trip with the Television Critics Association. It's called a "TCA Day" -- the first one was on Saturday, which consisted of a membership meeting and the TCA awards.

This morning, the TCA membership is boarding a bus outside the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills and heading out to Burbank and Hollywood for set visits at The Closer, Heroes, TMZ, Two and a Half Men, and Brothers & Sisters.

TMZ has a really weird picture of Tracy Morgan dressed like a flapper and holding hands with his wife. Apparently it's for a GQ magazine shoot, though I can't even imagine why he's wearing the skimpy dress. But, it's Tracy Morgan and we'll have to leave it at that.

On top of the slutty dress and the high heels (which he seems to be walking comfortably in), he's also sporting a lovely ankle bracelet that's a requirement of his DUI probation. The device is called a SCRAM, and it tests his skin for alcohol vapors and he's required to wear it for 90 days.

Check out the photo here. It'll make you laugh.

I know that we kid around a bit here at TV Squad when it comes to talking about TV personalities, especially when it comes to our favorite judges over at American Idol. However, I swear that we are not pulling your chain with this next story.

According to TMZ American Idol judge Paula Abdul broke her nose over the weekend when she tripped over her, er, her dog, which would be a, um, a chihuahua named Tulip. It seems that Paula was trying to step over the little runt to avoid smashing it (rather than, perhaps, pushing it aside with her pinky toe) and smashed her nose instead. According to a spokesperson for Abdul she was not hospitalized for the injury. It is unknown at the time whether this will prevent her from appearing on the live season finale of American Idol.

Folks, you just can't make this stuff up on your own!

Who is Olivia Mojica and why is she the focus of this week's American Idol scandal? Apparently, the Season Two contestant made a very lewd sex tape with her boyfriend and it's about to surface, courtesy of Vivid Entertainment. TMZ, of course, has the exclusive first look. Until this scandalous announcement, few of us remembered Olivia. Hopefully, a week from now, she will go back to being a footnote in Idol's history.

Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe denies that the gay banter between Ryan Seacrest and Simon Cowell is scripted. Lythgoe told TMZ, "If I would have written any of that it would have been a lot funnier, to be frank."

During the Top 12 performance show, Melinda Doolittle complained about wearing dresses and heels, and Ryan and Simon exchanged barbs about high heel advice, and coming out of closets.

Despite the fact that Ryan and Simon bicker on-air like a couple of old ladies, Ryan says, they get along fine. Ryan added, "We're seeking therapy and individual deep-tissue massage to get through the season."

Notice Ryan said "individual" and not "couples" deep-tissue massage, just to avoid any confusion about their relationship.

According to TMZ, ex-Idol contestant Alaina Alexander, and Top 10 finalist Chris Richardson are more than just Idol pals. They reportedly "hit it off instantly" and an Idol romance blossomed. The romance apparently continues even though Alaina was ousted earlier from the competition.

As proof of their romance, people point to a photo of the pair posted on Alaina's MySpace page. Alaina was also seen last week at the live taping of the show, sitting with Chris' friends and family.

Will it last? Who knows. And who really cares? Why does the public seem to crave these Reality TV romances? Will "Chris & Alaina" become the next "Rob & Amber?" I'll keep you posted.

Is it ever quiet in Idol-Scandalville? We just got rid of Antonella and her wet T-shirts, and now Mario Vazquez resurfaces from Season Four at the front and center of the latest Idol controversy.

As you may or may not recall, Mario quit in the middle of Season Four's competition for vague "personal reasons." It now looks like those "personal reasons" may have involved Mario's unwanted sexual advances and a former Idol employee.

TMZ will be the downfall of more than one celebrity. The LA gossip hounds have posted video of Michael Richards' soon-to-be infamous Laugh Factory performance in West Hollywood.

On Friday night, Richards proved that trying to shake the Seinfeld curse can get to a guy. In the middle of his stand-up routine, Richards took on two hecklers with a racist tirade that included your standard issue racial epithets along with this charmer, "Fifty years ago we'd have you upside down with a fucking fork up your ass." It was, of course, caught on tape by someone in attendance. Richards has already told the press that he's sorry and will "make amends." I'm tempted to take bets on whether he'll enter rehab, offer a tearful apology to Diane Sawyer or both.

Less you think this incident came out of nowhere, check out hip-hop theater artist Danny Hoch's monologue from Jails, Hospitals and Hip-Hop on his brush with the Seinfeld cast.

TMZ.com is reporting that the next batch of contestants on America's Next Top Model will be... er... heftier than the past models. That's not to say that they're going to be officially "plus size", as in size 14 or larger, but the girls in the next go-around will reportedly be meatier than past skin-and-bones models. Yeah, they'll probably be a size 2 instead of a zero. Oh, the horror! Maybe they'll be less bitchy than the other girls since they're not starving? Where's the fun in that?!?

No, this is not a setup for one of the comedian's stand-up routines. It seems that, after 10 years of marriage, Chris Rock has begun divorce proceedings against his wife Malaak Compton-Rock (Hey, they have the same last name. How weird.). According to TMZ the former Saturday Night Live cast member has hired a high-powered divorce attorney to represent him.

The couple married in 1996 and have two daughters, a 4-year-old and a 2-year-old. Malaak is the founder of StyleWORKS; a non-profit, full-service salon that provides free services for women leaving welfare and entering the workforce.

The E! television network is in big trouble with Brad Pitt. He is seeking trespassing charges against an E! producer and cameraman who allegedly strolled right onto his Hollywood Hills property last week. A rep for Pitt says he is exploring other legal options against the television network. Here's the weird thing: apparently TMZ.com originally reported on the producer and cameraman entering Pitt's property. So now the gossipers are blowing the whistle on each other? Maybe the entire business will self-destruct (yeah, right).

E! says it's investigating the claim and has since fired the two employees in question. It's surprising news about E!, really, since it seems to kiss celebrities' asses, while TMZ likes to stalk them.

Despite yesterday's report in the LA Times, Saturday Night Live actor Horatio Sanz says he's still a member of the cast. He tells the Chicago Sun-Times that he doesn't know "what the hell is going on" but he has no reason to believe he's out of a job. The LA Times says that Sanz, Kenan Thompson, and Chris Parnell are out. But, TMZ.com says it's Sanz and Will Forte who are cut from the show. (Will says he's staying, too) And the New York Post says Maya Rudolph is considering leaving the show.

Lorne Michaels had better speak up soon.

[Via Pop Candy and TV Tattle]

According to TMZ.com, Lark Voorhies is suing the National Enquirer over a story it ran last year claiming she was a coke head. Voorhies, now 32, played Lisa Turtle on Saved by the Bell from 1989 to 1993. She has appeared in a long line of television roles since then, but, from her IMDB bio, it appears she hasn't had much work since 2002.

Apparently, "a friend" told the tabloid that Voorhies had a cocaine addiction and was bipolar. In a court filing yesterday, Voorhies said the allegations are false and asked for unspecified punitive damages. She claims the article cost her several jobs and humiliated her.

TMZ is reporting that American Idol contestant, and human windmill, Taylor Hicks is planning to gradually dye some of the grey color out of his hair. They even have a rendition of what he might look like without any grey at all.

I am a little nervous that he might actually do it. Last week, when Ryan Seacrest brought up Taylor's salt-and-pepper hair, Taylor seemed to joke that he might be dying it.

The grey hair definitely makes Taylor look older than his mere 29 years. And, quite frankly, of all Taylor's quirky characteristics, his grey hair is probably the least interesting. But, America votes for people like Taylor because of who they are and not who record companies manufacture them to be. I say, keep the grey!

It must be the crowd, and not the cameras or the lights, that is making Kellie Pickler nervous. After all, she has been on a televised singing competition before. And it wasn't too long ago. TMZ has a short video clip of Kellie competing in a 2005 Charlotte, North Carolina singing competition called Gimme the Mike (we have a version here in Portland, too). Kellie made it into the top five but did not win. The clip over at TMZ shows Kellie singing Independence Day and Stand by Your Man. I think she's yelling the songs, but, then again, I think she yells every song. There are also photos from her high school yearbook where she's totally into cheerleading and she still has naturally blond hair.