TVSquad

[via Gawker]

• The guys perform on American Idol, on FOX at 8pm. It's followed by the new sitcom Free Ride.
• ABC has new eps of George Lopez, Freddie, and Lost, followed by a new Barbara Walters Special, with George Clooney, Patrick Dempsey, Mariah Carey, and Matthew McConaughey.
• CBS has two new eps of Still Standing at 8 (hmm...they're doing this a lot lately...burning the eps off quickly maybe?), followed by a new Criminal Minds and then a new CSI: NY.
• NBC has another ep of Deal Or No Deal at 8, followed by a repeat Law and Order, and then a new Law and Order. 
• The WB has a new One Tree Hill, then a repeat Beauty and the Geek, while UPN has a new America's Next Top Model and a repeat Veronica Mars.
• Discovery has a new Superships at 8, followed by two repeat eps of Mythbusters. 
• ABC Family has The Karate Kid II at 8.
• Also at 8, some movies: AMC has For Your Eyes Only, FLIX has Silverado, and Encore has Patton.
• At 9, ESPN has the Philadelphia 76ers at the Houston Rockets. 
• STARZ has Van Helsing, also at 9.
• At 10, Bravo has a new Project Runway.
• MTV has a new True Life at 10, followed by a repeat of The Real World: Key West.
• Also at 10: FX has Colin Farrell, Katie Holmes and the voice of Kiefer Sutherland in Phone Booth. 
• Comedy Central has a new Drawn Together at 10:30.    

• "If Jay Leno makes you laugh, chances are I don't care for you as a person." - The Family Guy's Peter Griffin, giving the Top Ten Things I Would Like To Say To America, on The Late Show With David Letterman.
• "Crippling depression is a wonderful muse." - Linda, talking about her poetry, on Still Standing.
• "...because they wanted one last chance at the employee ham discount, or wanted to put a little extra something in the ham." - Jon Stewart, about some of the ham factory workers who won the powerball jackpot going back to work, on The Daily Show.  
• "I gotta drop a deuce." - Bobby, wanting to use the new outhouse for the usual purpose and not store supplies, on Survivor. 

• ABC has a new George Lopez at 8pm, followed by a new Freddie, a repeat Lost (sorry fans!), and then a repeat of Invasion.
• CBS has a new Still Standing (the most underrated sitcom on TV) at 8, a new Yes, Dear at 8:30, a repeat Criminal Minds, then a new CSI: NY.
• NBC has a new E-Ring, a new Biggest Loser, then a repeat Law and Order.
• FOX has more awful American Idol auditions at 8, followed by a new ep of Bones.
• On the WB: a new One Tree Hill, then a repeat Beauty and the Geek. On UPN: new eps of South Beach and Veronica Mars.
• There's a new Emeril Live on Food Network at 8: "Emeril's Belgian Bistro."
• Hey, the worst Bond movie of all-time is on AMC at 8! It's A View To A Kill, Roger Moore's last time as 007. 
• 8pm movies: TCM has The African Queen and HBO has Lackawanna Blues.
• Also at 8: Fuse has a new ep of F-List.
• At 9, Lifetime has Mary-Louise Parker in the movie Miracle Run.
• HGTV has a new Buy Me at 9.
• Also at 9: Food Network has a new Behind The Bash. It's followed by new eps of Sugar Rush, Good Eats, and Ham on the Street. 
• New stuff on MTV at 10: MTV Cribs, followed by a new ep of something called Parental Control.
• TV Land has That's What I'm Talking About, about influential black films, TV shows, and performers.
• Bravo has a new ep of Project Runway at 10.
• At 11, BBC America has Monty Python, while American Life has I Spy.
• Just after midnight, HBO has Mystic River.

• PBS has a new episode of National Geographic, "The New Royals." Check local listings for time.
• ABC all new eps of George Lopez at 8pm, Freddie, Lost, and Invasion.
• CBS is all new too, with Still Standing, Yes, Dear, Criminal Minds, and CSI: NY.
• NBC has Jamie Foxx singing! Unpredictable airs at 8, and is followed by a new ep of The Biggest Loser and a repeat Law and Order.
• More American Idol auditions on FOX at 8. (Last night they had some worse singers than William Hung, and also one of the best singers they've ever had on any American Idol). Then at 9 there's a new Bones (new night and time).
• UPN has a new South Beach and a new Veronica Mars, while the WB has a new One Tree Hill and a repeat Beauty and the Geek. 
• Discovery has a new Superships at 8.
• Also at 8: the best Bond movie, Goldfinger, followed by Thunderball.
• On Emeril Live at 8: "A Hunter's Feast." It's on Food Network. 
• TCM has the original Bad News Bears at 8.
• At 9, TNT has a cool, underrated action flick, The Long Kiss Goodnight, with Geena Davis as a suburban mom assassin with amnesia.
• Buy Me. I mean a new ep of that show is on HGTV at 9, of course.
• At 9:30, A&E has a new Inked, while ESPN2 has The Australian Open.
• This should be a cool new ep of Good Eats: Alton Brown explains the basics of a home bar. It's on at 10, and is followed by a new Ham on the Street.
• Also at 10: Bravo has a new Project Runway (repeated at 11).
• At 10:30, Comedy Central has a new Drawn Together.
• At 11, Soap Network has They Started on Soaps 5, which shows clips of famous celebs who got their start in daytime, including Jennifer Garner, Hilary Swank, and Steve Zahn.
• At 12:30am, Cartoon Network has a new Samurai Champloo.

• FOX has more crazy auditions on American Idol at 8pm, followed by the debut of Skating With Celebrities. 
• CBS is all new tonight, with Still Standing, Yes, Dear, Criminal Minds, CSI: NY.
• ABC has a repeat Lost at 8, followed by a new episode, and then a new Invasion.
• NBC has a new E-Ring at 8, followed by a new Biggest Loser at 9 and then a new Law and Order.  
• The WB has a new One Tree Hill at 8 and then a repeat Beauty and the Geek, while UPN has a new South Beach and a repeat Veronica Mars.
• Also at 8: Discovery has a new ep of Superships, followed by a new Mythbusters, and then the new documentary Stunt Junkies.
• Emeril cooks up a "Mexican Fiesta" on Food Network at 8.
• AMC has the first Bond movie, Dr. No, at 8, followed by the second Bond movie, From Russia With Love.
• At 8:30, HGTV has a new I Want That, followed by a new Buy Me at 9.
• At 9, a bunch of movies: Oxygen has Kissing Jessica Stein, while the Sci-Fi Channel has Tidal Wave: No Escape and Spike has Trading Places.
• Spy stuff on American Life: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. at 9, The Girl From U.N.C.L.E. at 10, and I Spy at 11.
• Outdoor Life is running a marathon of Survivor: Amazon episodes.
• Also at 9: HBO2 has Spartan, with Val Kilmer and Derek Luke.
• At 9:30, Sundance has Macaulay Culkin and Seth Green in Party Monster.   
• At 10, Food Network has a new Good Eats, followed by a new Ham on the Street (anyone ever see this show? What is it?)
• Also at 10, Bravo has a new Project Runway (repeated at 11 too).
• At 11, on a new Isaac, the designer asks Rob Morrow and Joshua Bell what kind of underwear they're wearing. 
• You can check out Kathy Griffin's house on a new MTV Cribs at 10.
• At 12:30, Cartoon Network has a new Samurai Champloo.       

• FOX has a repeat That 70s Show at 8pm, a new Stacked at 8:30, and then a repeat Nanny 911 at 9.
• ABC has...more football?! The Rose Bowl airs at 8.
• CBS has repeats of Still Standing, Yes, Dear, Criminal Minds, and CSI: NY.
• NBC has a special Biggest Loser at 8, followed by a repeat Law and Order at 10.
• The WB has repeats of One Tree Hill and Beauty and the Geek, while UPN has repeats of Eve, Love, Inc, and Veronica Mars.
• You can watch The O'Reilly Factor at 8 on FOX News and see if Bill mentions his Letterman appearance.
• There's a new Emeril Live on The Food Network at 8, with Emeril cooking hearty fall recipes.
• Also at 8: CMT has the 1997 Dukes of Hazzard reunion movie.
• At 9, HGTV has a new Buy Me.
• Food Network has a new Behind the Bash at 9, followed by a new Sugar Rush.
• Spy stuff on American Life: at 8, The Man From U.N.C.L.E.; at 9, The Girl From U.N.C.L.E.; and at 10, I Spy.
• At 10, Bravo has a new Project Runway.
• Troy airs on HBO2 at 10, followed by a special on The Producers movie.
• TNT has the inferior Dial M For Murder remake, A Perfect Murder. It airs at 10 too.
• Just before midnight you can catch In Good Company, with Dennis Quaid, Topher Grace, and Scarlett Johansson.
• At 1am on Showtime, Kenneth Branagh stars in The Gingerbread Man.