screech-related stories
We told you recently about People getting all of the Saved by the Bell cast members together for a reunion and cover photo. Everyone except Dustin Diamond, that is (they didn't want him there). But he has a cover of his own, thank you very much, the one to his new tell-all Behind The Bell. 
Yesterday we had a video that "explained" why Tiffani Thiessen was too busy to reunite with her Saved By The Bell costars on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. But the new People has the cast on the cover. Everyone except for Screech, who is busy with his tell-all book.
Judging from the amount of hyperbole being used each day on The Drudge Report, it appears that the nation might be sliding into an economic downturn. While a lot of you might be worried about this, I'm completely confident that the current presidential brain-trust will solve the problem and in no way will it lame-duck its way through the next seven months, leaving the economy's problems for the next poor schlub who gets elected.Continue reading TV 101: Celeb-Security (OR: Another fool-proof plan to save the world!)
How can you tell if an actor is funny? Ken Levine has the answer. 
The Smoking Gun has obtained a copy of Dustin Diamond's 
I think I speak for everyone when I say, "Huh????"
Boxer Mike Tyson, who has been making the rounds on Scarbourough Country and other TV shows saying he's going to fight female boxers, is now saying that he's going to fight 60something singer Tom Jones in a charity match.
Um, yeah, OK. I'll believe that when I see it. For two reasons: one, this is from WENN, an entertainment news service that provides news to several sites, including the IMDB, and their info can be shaky sometimes. Second, as a longtime Tom Jones fan, I can't see any reason why Jones would lower himself like this. I mean, Horshack from Welcome Back, Kotter fought in a celeb match (I think it was against Screech, which tells you all you need to know), but why would Jones want to do it?
[via Best Week Ever]
Whether you're a Christian or, like me, belong to a secret church that worships elves, you gotta love the holiday season. This year you can make the season even brighter for someone by giving them what will probably be the most popular gift this year next to the new Play With Me For A Week Then Throw Me In The Closet And Never Think About Me Again Elmo: Dustin Diamond's four year old sex tape. Who among us hasn't wished upon a star for our own copy of Screech doing the nasty with a strange woman? I'm going to wait for the enhanced DVD version with audio commentary from Francis Ford Coppola, but if you just can't wait, porn company Red Light District, the same company that released Paris Hilton's infamous sex tape, will be releasing the video online and in stores. If I were you I'd grab my sleeping bag and grab a spot in line now.Dustin Diamond has been in the "fringe pop culture" news a lot lately, hasn't he? First, he begged for money to save his house, then he got mugged. Now, the man best known for playing Saved By The Bell's nerdy Screech has reached the pinnacle of Z-level celebdom: he's got his very own sex tape.
Dustin Diamond is really starting to get on my nerves. First, in order to change his image from the screechy-voiced character he played on the NBC Saturday-morning sitcom Saved by the Bell he became a foul-mouthed comedian (like we don't have those already). Recently, much to the anger of his fans, he decided to sell $20 t-shirts to save his Wisconsin home from being foreclosed upon.. And now, he's giving out sex advice saying, among many things, that he could write a book on the sexual moves that he has tried and tested and that you need to tap your partner so hard they fall asleep.
I don't know if this is some sort of long-term plan of Dustin's to have us forget that he played the role of Screech for nearly a decade. Or, maybe it's just him trying to drum up some new publicity for himself. I can't read his mind, so I don't know the definitive answer. However, I do know one thing . . .
No matter what he does, he'll still be Screech.
Continue reading Screech is really starting to tick me off
Yesterday, Dustin Diamond, best known as Screech from Saved by the Bell, appeared on the Howard Stern show. During the appearance, he mentioned, among other things (let's just say the number "10" came up somewhere in the conversation... that's all I'll say about that) that he signed a messed-up land contract to get his house in Wisconsin, and for various reasons, he's about to lose it. As part of his efforts, he is selling t-shirts online for $15 ($20 if you want them signed by Dustin). 
It was about a week ago. Late at
night. Insomnia had wretchedly peeled back my eyelids. I forced myself to stay in bed and try to get some sleep, but I
allowed the TV to stay on. Adult Swim gently blinked on the screen. After a few more hours, I could feel insomnia
letting up. Finally. Sleep. The shadows on my wall danced to the changing images on the screen. Ah. A commercial about
Saved By The Bell coming to Adult Swim -- Wait a second. Saved By The Bell? On a late-night cartoon
channel? I panicked. The shadows on the wall surrounded me. The commercial was still on the screen. I helplessly
flailed my arms. Immediately, my limbs became tangled in my sheets. My mind raced. "Does not compute! Does not
compute!" And that was when my spinal column leapt up and throttled my brain. True story.
If you don't know who those six characters are just by their first
names, well then, shame on you, and you obviously didn't grow up in the early 90's. They are the main cast from the
one, the only, Saved By the Bell. This brilliant piece of broadcasting was shown on Saturday mornings from
1989-1993, launched a number of careers, spawned countless spinoffs and impostors, and as of this morning, can be
bought from the iTunes music store. Right now, they're only selling Season 1, but I'm sure the rest will follow shortly
(personally I can't wait for the "Summer Season" with the voice of Pumba and a young Leah Remini). The classic
Schoolhouse Rock shorts, along with the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Video Special ( a move that I'm sure will
make for many a happy valentine's day today across the nation), are also available through the online store today.
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