TVSquad

Last week, I revealed the Top 25 things that only happen on TV (and in the movies) according to the Have Happy Fun Time blog (and supposedly many other blogs and websites). Since the release of this article, many TV Squad readers commented to add their own item to the list. Since some of them are really true and funny, I thought it would be a nice idea to share with everyone.

Do you know how many e-mails we get here at TV Squad from people who think we're actually in control of what happens on television? Way too many.

We can answer (or try to answer) any question you might have about television, but if you write to us begging we bring Everwood back, there's not much we can do for you. We just write about television, we don't make the shows. If I had my way, Wonder Showzen would still be on the air, but I don't, and it isn't.

Have you heard about the new phone? No, not that one. The one that's for die-hard fans of The Simpsons! This week in Las Vegas at the Consumer Electronics Show (CES), Samsung is quietly showing off a bright yellow Simpsons telephone (photo attached). The phones have the Simpsons movie logo on them so apparently they are tie-ins to the upcoming movie and they do say 'Limited Edition'. Hopefully they have personalized ringtones too. I'd love the 'squeak-squeak' of Maggie's pacifier as a text message notification.

How many of you would buy a Simpsons telephone? It kinda pales in comparison to the big phone, doesn't it? I bet it's a lot more affordable, though.

[Via TV Tattle]

I'm pretty much a technophobe, meaning I'm not only completely inept and ignorant when it comes to any kind of electronic or mechanical gadget, but I actually collapse to the kitchen floor sobbing whenever I make toast. Being who I am, I never would have figured out what our sister site PVR Wire discovered via the Tivo blog, which is that you can use your Tivo (or any DVR with a USB port, I suppose) to charge your iPod or mobile phone. Just plug the USB cord into the USB port on your Tivo, connect your handheld device to the other end, and there you go. I haven't actually tried this yet, but apparently it works. If you folks have any other fancy uses for the Tivo, let me know in the comments.

CNN's Nancy Grace, the most heinous woman on television, needs to be unplugged. She is a contemptible being who gets her kicks off of lashing out at people and flat-out accusing them of crimes that are still being investigated. Earlier this week, Grace verbally accosted a woman over the telephone about her two-year old son, who had allegedly been kidnapped. The next day the woman, 21-year old Melinda Duckett, shot and killed herself just hours before her interview was scheduled to air. Apparently, at the end of the interview, Grace pounded the desk and said to the distraught mother, "Where were you? Why aren't you telling us where you were that day?" Grace denies any responsibility, saying, "I do not feel that our show is to blame for what happened to Melinda Duckett. The truth... is not always nice or polite or easy to go down. Sometimes it's harsh, and it hurts." So... once again Nancy has decided that someone is guilty.

We'll never know if uber-bitch Nancy Grace pushed this mother over the edge. And that's not even the issue. The problem here is Nancy Grace believes she can investigate cases better than the actual investigators. Maybe the mother is responsible for her son's disappearance. Is it Nancy Grace's job to get a confession?

If you're a fan of the TLC series Miami Ink, and especially tattoo artist Ami James, you might find this interesting. James has been picked by Motorola to etch cool "tattoos" onto their swanky RAZR phones. The new phones will be available by Christmas, so if you know somebody who loves tattoos and overpriced phones but doesn't actually want the tattoos on their body, this would probably be the perfect gift. RAZR's can sell for as much as $300 or even $600 for special models, but if you mail me your current mobile phone I'll draw a picture of Snoopy on it with a Sharpie for ten cents. Trust me, that's way cooler than whatever the hell James is doing.

(S06E16)

Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.

Homer: That's no reason to block the TV.

We get a rather dubious science lesson at the beginning of this episode when Lisa explains to Bart that the water in the sink and toilet always spins in the same direction due to the Coriolis effect. Usually the writers try to be scientifically accurate, but in this case they had to jump on the "water always flows one way in one hemisphere and the opposite direction in the other" bandwagon, or else Bart never would never have called Australia to see which way their toilet drains, and we wouldn't have ourselves one of those "Simpsons go abroad" episodes.

The prank-calling puppets of Crank Yankers are coming to MTV2. The show originally premiered on Comedy Central in 2002 and is produced by Jimmy Kimmel and Adam Carolla. Regulars include Wanda Sykes, Jim Florentine, Dane Cook, Sarah Silverman, and Tracy Morgan. One of the producers of the show has a great quote, he says, "With all the trouble in the world, it's comforting to know that MTV2 understands how vital crank phone calls made by puppets are to this nation."

I admit to watching this show occasionally but I honestly didn't notice that it was off the air. Is this good news to anybody?

Did any of our readers happen to catch this exchange (link to an MP3 file) between Adam Carolla and Ann Coulter on Carolla's radio show the other day? If we thought Ann Coulter was vicious, she may have met her match with Adam Carolla, who started their conversation by gently razing her for calling in an hour and a half late, and then hanging up on her after she tells him she's tight on time. He then tells his crew and the listening audience he "doesn't have time for bitches." Therein lies the difference between Adam Carolla and myself, because I always have time for bitches. According to The Great Society, Carolla offered an apology to Coulter the next day that really wasn't much of an apology. I don't have an audio link for that one, though.

 

So, like me you may have tried for hours to get through to the phone number shown during a fake commercial toward the end of tonight's episode of Lost. The commercial featured the Hanso Foundation, then displayed a phone number to call: 877-HANSORG. Well, I finally got though and recorded what happens if you follow the general information extension (1), though there are several others you can follow. Have a listen for yourself.

[UPDATE: The recording above has changed!]

I'm curious about who out there actually participates in the vote. Or, do you just sit back to watch the performances and wait to see who gets booted? During the first season of American Idol, I was a passive viewer. I didn't vote once. Not even for Kelly Clarkson in the finale. During the second season, however, I voted for Clay Aiken like a mad woman. Season 3 didn't really turn my crank but I did vote regularly during Season 4 for both Carrie and Bo.

This season? So far, there's no one who's inspired me to pick up the phone and dial.

Do you call (or text) your vote for American Idol? Why? Who are you voting for this season?

Fake wrestling promoter and all around bombastic personality Vince McMahon is being accused by an employee of a Bocan Raton, Florida tanning salon of showing nude pictures of himself to her and trying to kiss her. The 22-year-old alleges McMahon showed her naked pictures of himself on his mobile phone, then followed her into a room and tried to kiss her and lift up her shirt. A customer who was there the same day described McMahon, whom she didn't know from TV, as "nothing but a gentleman." As is always the case with stories like this, the veracity of everyone's story has yet to be determined. McMahon has so far not been charged with anything.

Special thanks to Doug Stewart for tipping us off.

On January 24, CBS will debut a "micro-series" called The Courier. The first sixty-second segment of the show, which will air during the first commercial break of CSI: Miami. It will be followed by shorter segments which will also air during the first commercial break of the 9 p.m. hour during following days. The series will conclude on February 1. The series will center on a man who must perform death defying feats in order to save his kidnapped wife. Famous BASE jumper Iiro Seppanen will star. The series will also be available online and via mobile phone.

If you don't like the idea of turning your gaze away from the TV when the phone rings, Time Warner might have something that's right up your alley. A new device will actually display Caller ID on your TV screen for a couple of rings. It's not available everywhere yet, but it is already being tested in a few markets. All I can say is thank you, Time Warner. I was really starting to wear myself out craning my neck and reaching with my hand to look at my phone.