TVSquad

I always imagined that being a Hilton is like living in a soap opera--wealth, scandal, and the occasional arrest. Apparently real life isn't dramatic enough for one member of the Hilton clan. Paris' mother, Kathy Hilton, will appear on The Young and the Restless as herself. The episode, which will air on May 13, was filmed on Wednesday.

Hilton's fictional self will ruffle some feathers in her Y&R cameo by taking over a magazine photo shoot. I'm not sure where that falls on a soap opera's bad behavior scale, but I'm sure that such workplace antics will at least earn Kathy a few dirty looks. The Hiltons have had plenty of TV exposure over the last month. Paris just did a cameo on a recent episode of My Name is Earl. Barron Hilton, Paris' brother, became a gossip show regular following his DUI arrest.

• Paris Hilton unintentionally brought clean water to thousands of people in need, and will help educate hundreds of blind children. It's the best outcome of a DUI and sex tape ever!!!
  
• Interesting: no one's using the news to fill gaps left by the strike.
  
• An answer to a viewer question about how the strike affects ad-libbed shows like Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Tonight at 10, the annual Barbara Walters special The 10 Most Fascinating People of 2007 aired on ABC. And on the same day, Walters says that she's tired of celebrity interviews. She says that she's "not going after the tabloid stuff" and "It's a different climate now and 20/20 and the other magazines are focused on the big celebrities. I didn't want to keep doing that, I have been doing it for years." That's why people like Britney Spears and Paris Hilton aren't part of the list.

Or could it be that on no planet at any time would these two people be considered even remotely "fascinating?"

• Paris Hilton's rep denies reports that Paris is determined to save drunk elephants.
  
• Britney Spears taught Heidi Klum some things about diapers?
  
• John Stamos got roughed up a bit on a recent flight.
  

What's happening on other blogs via the interweb.

• If you missed the video of Tyra Banks talking about her farts, here it is.
• Is Pam Anderson getting married again?
• NBC's Jeff Zucker just bought Kitty Carlisle's place.
• George Michael is going to appear in a few episodes of the new ABC show Eli Stone.
• Our friends at Cinematical have info on the first video from the Sex and the City movie.
• Did ex-Lost star Michelle Rodriguez violate the terms of her probation?
• David Letterman asked Paris Hilton about prison the other night - a lot. Here's the video.
• Entertainment Weekly's PopWatch blog asks: who's the weakest link on Heroes?

• Prison Break's Wentworth Miller says he's only brooding and squinty for health reasons.
  
• Paris Hilton is un-invited to Oktoberfest. It may have been those cans of wine she brought last year.
• Victoria Beckham is teaming up with the Pussycat Dolls.
  
• On tonight: The first episode of Dancing with the Stars!

• Where were bad girls Britney, Paris and Lindsay at the Teen Choice Awards?
  
• Worst idea ever? Kid Nation now has union problems, on top of all their other issues.
  

I just got back from doing my weekly grocery shopping. It took me almost an hour and a half because of the people at the grocery store and the traffic. That's about the amount of time that Nicole Richie stayed in jail today.

The official time was 82 minutes. Seems that's all the time she had to do, apparently. Although she was sentenced to 96 hours in jail but got out rather, um, quickly, "based on her sentence and federal guidelines." Richie was sent to jail for DUI and...well, it's hard to remember what she did and what Paris did and what Lindsay did and what Britney has done.

So what did they do, just give her a tour of the jail and then release her? Did they just strip search her and do her paperwork and then it was time to leave? Did she get a meal or at least a snack in that 82 minutes?

Looks like a lot more celebs are lining up to be on Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice than I thought.

So far, the Donald has signed Joan Rivers, Carmen Electra, Jim Cramer of CNBC, Naomi Judd, George Foreman, Pete Rose, Tony Hawk, Danica Patrick, and Jeff Gordon. That's quite a mixture of sports figures, comics, and really loud financial analysts. I wonder if Foreman will try to punch Trump if he tries to tell him how to sell things.

Trump says that there are over one hundred celebrities who wanted to be on the show (guess they'll have to wait until Celebrity Apprentice 2). Trump also reveals that Britney Spears and Paris Hilton have some interest in being on the show, and he's going to try to get Lindsay Lohan too. Oh, that would be great if they could be on the same team, wouldn't it? What could their team name be?

• The secret that everyone already knew.
• Hurricane Dean is coming, and that means the news networks are going crazy.
• Get ready for a ton of "How are Katie Couric and Meredith Vieira doing one year later?" stories (Sept. 5 for Katie, the following week for Meredith).
• Paris Hilton has a new line of children's clothing.
• Here's video of Alex Trebek screwing up on the Jeopardy! set and swearing.
• The art of the TV Mashup.
• Jaime Weinman shows up some of TV's most depressing intros.

• Whoa! Paris Hilton just lost 60 million dollars in inheritance?
  
• Television cartoons from the 80's are making a comeback.
  
• I had almost forgotten completely about them, but then Trista and Ryan had a baby, just in the nick of time.