TVSquad

• At 8, ABC has a new Dancing with the Stars, followed by new episodes of Samantha Who? and Boston Legal.
• CBS has a new Big Bang Theory at 8, then new episodes of How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men, Worst Week, and CSI: Miami.
• NBC has new episodes of Chuck and Heroes, followed by the series premiere of My Own Worst Enemy.
• FOX has more Baseball Playoffs at 8, the Dodgers vs. the Phillies.
• The CW has a new Gossip Girl at 8, then a new One Tree Hill.
• History Channel has a new Modern Marvels at 8.
• At 8:30, ESPN has Monday Night Football, the Giants vs. the Browns.
• At 9, USA has a new Monday Night RAW.
• IFC has I, The Jury at 9.
• Food Network has a new Unwrapped at 9.
• At 10, TNT has a new Raising The Bar.
• Food Network has a new Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives at 10.

Check your local TV listings for more.

After the jump, the late night talk show listings.

• At 5, TBS has the Rays/White Sox game, followed by the Red Sox/Angels game.
  
• At 8, ABC has a new Dancing with the Stars, then a new Boston Legal.
• CBS has a new Big Bang Theory at 8, followed by new episodes of How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men, Worst Week, and CSI: Miami.
• NBC has new episodes of Chuck, Heroes, and Life.
• FOX has a new Sarah Connor Chronicles at 8, followed by a new Prison Break.
• At 8:30, ESPN has Monday Night Football, the Vikings vs. the Saints.
• Also at 8:30: Food Network has a new How'd That Get On My Plate, then a new Unwrapped.
• At 9, USA has a new Monday Night RAW.
• At 10, TNT has a new Raising The Bar.
• Food Network has a new Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.
• MTV has a new episode of The Hills.

Check your local TV listings for more.

After the jump, the late night talk show listings.

This video has been floating around the blogosphere for a few days -- thanks to Deadspin, who always seems to be able to dig up fun clips like this -- but I wanted to put it up here, for those who missed it (or those who find it so funny that they want to see it over and over again):

The clip is an outtake of Chris Berman doing a Monday Night Football halftime show in 2000 (when MNF was on ABC and was still semi-relevant). Apparently, people were moving within Berman's line of sight while he was doing said halftime show, and he didn't like it. Nope, he didn't like it one bit. He hated it so much, that went on an obscenity-laden tirade, only to pause to take a dainty sip of what looks like a Diet Coke.

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

If I was to summarize the cable ratings for this week, it would be football, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, High School Musical 2, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, World's Funniest Commercials, football, football, football, football, football, football, football, The Santa Clause 2, football, football, football.

Next week might be more of the same, since there were college football games on New Year's Day.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

It's funny, when I was typing this out, I had a strong sense of deja vu. I had to keep on checking to see if this was the ratings from a month ago or the ratings for this week, but it is indeed correct. Monday Night RAW and SpongeBob often make the list, but shows like SportsCenter, The Santa Clause 2, I Love New York 2, and Tila Tequila threw me for a loop for a second there.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

Now there seems to be three episodes of Monday Night RAW in the top ten. Or maybe it's the same episode and three different hours, or maybe it's two different episodes, with two of the hours of one episode and one hour of the other episode making the list. I'm not sure. I've always been a little confused on exactly why separate hours of the same episode of a show is counted as different shows. Then again, if I ran television, Eyes would still be on the air.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

A note about these ratings. There are two ways to measure ratings, by household rating and by viewers. We choose to do them by viewers. Other sites might do them by households, so some of the numbers might be a bit different. The shows in the top 10 (or in the case of the regular networks, the top 20) will usually be the same, just rearranged a bit. For example, this week, The Closer was #3 in viewers but actually #2 in households. In viewers, Holiday in Handcuffs took that #2 spot.

And is anyone else made a little uneasy by the title Holiday in Handcuffs?

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

What's this, a football game in the top ten besides Monday Night Football? I don't know how the Packers/Cowboys game on NFL Network came in second this week. Was it a pivotal game or something? I don't really watch football. Monday Night RAW shows up again (still not sure why it's considered two different hours instead of one, two-hour show), along with weekly favorite SpongeBob. Tin Man got great ratings for Sci-Fi Channel.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

• At 8, NBC has the season finale (fall finale?) of Chuck, then the season finale (fall finale?) of Heroes, and then a new Life (special night - part 2 airs Weds at 10).
• ABC has A Charlie Brown Christmas at 8, followed by new episodes of Samantha Who?, Notes from the Underbelly, and October Road.
• ABC Family has Christmas specials starting at 8: The Year Without A Santa Claus, Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer & The Island of Misfit Toys, and Nestor The Long-Eared Christmas Donkey.
• TNT has a new Christmas episode of The Closer at 8, then a new Saving Grace.
• Also at 8: Food Network has a new Good Eats, followed by a new The Secret Life Of...
• At 8:30, ESPN has the Patriots/Ravens game.
• At 9, FOX has a new K-Ville.
• USA has a new Monday Night RAW at 9.
• Lifetime has the movie A Dad For Christmas at 9.
• Sci-Fi has the second part of Tin Man. It's on at 9 as well.

Check your local TV listings for more.

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

Whoa, whoa, and (one more) whoa. We get a top 10 list this week that not only has no sign of Hannah Montana but also includes shows like Shot At Love: Tila Tequila, The Hills, and I Love New York 2? Who do these upstarts think they are, horning in this week? At least we have Monday Night Football and SpongeBob at the top so all seems normal with the universe.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

I could have just put the picture of SpongeBob's smiling face (at least I think he's smiling) in this post and you could have figured out who ruled the cable ratings this week. And it wasn't just the regular show. In the top 10 we also see the Atlantis SquarePants special and something called Behind The Pantis, which sounds vaguely creepy. The only specials that didn't make the list are SpongeBob SquarePants: The Early Years and SpongeBob: May I Sleep With Danger?

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

Whew, Hannah Montana is back in the top ten! It had me and my friends worried for a while there (we always have Hannah Montana parties on the weekends, sitting around in our jammies watching TV, eating popcorn and playing Mystery Date), being upstaged by football players and wrestlers and talking sponges. But there she is at #3. SpongeBob is still pretty damn strong though, taking three of the top ten spots.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

It's funny how cable is always seen as the varied, creative alternative to the shows that are on network television, but week after week it's always Monday Night Football and three or four episodes of SpongeBob in the top 10. And I still don't know why Monday Night RAW's two hour are considered two different hours in the ratings.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

A special word for our readers who are fans of Hannah Montana. It's not my fault she's not in the top 10 this week! She was in the top 20 but was nudged out of the top of the list by football players, wrestlers, and that bastard SpongeBob SquarePants. It's often a battle between SpongeBob and Hannah for some reason. This week the guy under the sea won, with three episodes in the top 10.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

1. Monday Night Football (ESPN)
2. Hannah Montana (Disney)
3. Law and Order: CI (USA)
4. College Football - Auburn/LSU (ESPN)
5. Wizards of Waverly Place (Disney)
6. College Football - South Florida/Rutgers (ESPN)
7. WWE Monday Night RAW - 10pm (USA)
8. Hannah Montana (Disney)
9. Hannah Montana (Disney)
10. WWE Monday Night RAW - 9pm (USA)