TVSquad

As you know, Jerry Seinfeld recently received the Comedian Award. If you're wondering just how much awards, award ceremonies, and the pageantry that surrounds them means to Mr. Seinfeld, allow me to direct you to the hilarious clip below from the HBO special (via Best Week Ever). I about lost it after his "senators from Krypton remark."

I have to say that Seinfeld echoes my exact sentiments. I haven't sat down and watched the Oscars, Emmys or the Golden Globes in many, many years. I think the last award ceremony that I found even remotely interesting was the Pinewood Derby Awards in 1987, and that's only because I was a participant (and by the way, Boy Scout Troop 141: those weight restrictions are there for a reason. I lost against a car that was clearly over the legal limit).

In all honesty, I'm glad Seinfeld won the Comedian Award, because I really can't take any professional seriously unless they've been given some kind of engraved tchotchke for their efforts. That's why I currently have eleven cavities and am searching for a dentist who has won the Best Dentist Award. Otherwise, why bother?

I grew up on a farm, so I could only watch cable when visiting friends in town, at least until I was in high school and my family got a satellite dish. This was in the '90s, and one of our favorite channels to watch as a family was Nick at Nite: we'd watch The Donna Reed Show, The Patty Duke Show and Mr. Ed. You know, classic TV.

Fast forward to today and you have shows like Home Improvement, George Lopez and Saget-era America's Funniest Home Videos slated to appear on the cable channel, none of which feel especially "classic" to me. And George Lopez is still on, for the love of God.

Courtesy of Boing Boing comes this local commercial for a flea market in Montgomery, Alabama (see it below). Yes, it's silly, lame, and goes on a little too long, but for a locally-produced ad, it's really not that bad. I'm not expecting high quality from local advertising, anyway.

The man in the video is the owner of Flea Market Montgomery, Sammy Stephens. In case the video isn't enough, I would like to remind you that his store is just like a mini ... mall. Stephens has already gained some notoriety, most notably on The Ellen Show when host Ellen DeGeneres asked him to appear because she found his commercial so funny.

Click ahead, crank up your computer speakers, and get down with what is most likely the greatest rap song ever written about a flea market.

At least, that's what gossip rag Starpulse is claiming. Apparently the middle-of-the-road crooner thinks he might actually have a fighting chance in the cutthroat world of talk shows, but he's not quite ready to put in the amount of work it takes to create a good show. Bolton claims, "I could do a show where I could look at topics and social issues and have fun, but also do my musical thing at the same time." That's a really great idea, and it's only been done by, well, everybody. Frankly, I don't think Mr. Bolton has the slightest clue what makes a talk show successful, so I'm here to tell him, right now, that making a talk show takes time, love, and tenderness. Also, it's not wise to start a talk show and then end it suddenly, because how are we supposed to live without you, when we've been loving you so long? Okay, I've run out of Michael Bolton lyrical references, so I'll just stop now.