TVSquad

How long will baseball fans have to wait to watch the end of game five of the World Series between the Phillies and the Rays? Well, it'll be at least another day. Major League Baseball commissioner Bud Selig has canceled tonight's resumption of the suspended game five.

Oh, and you know that Barack Obama ad that is going to be shown from 8-8:30 on NBC and CBS (but not ABC)? It's also going to be on Fox, too. The World Series game will be pushed back to accommodate the Democratic Presidential candidate.

Don't flip out and cry foul! The TV gods anticipated that there might be a conflict when they sold the time slot to the Obama campaign. In fact, they had the opportunity to turn them down. But Fox was inclined to take the ad revenue.

(S06E10) All season, I have been trying to put a positive spin on bad writing, poor casting choices (Sheriff Turner, remember her? Barely? We never see her, so maybe they think she was a poor choice too), episodes that seem recycled from other seasons, and others that are completely forgettable and irrelevant. But tonight was just the last straw. I have had it. I cannot think of one more good thing to say about this infomercial for Visa that is running around disguising itself as television.

Apparently, in 1998, when the Beastie Boys' album Hello Nasty was released, the boys did a half-hour "informercial" for the CD that aired on public access in several markets. Someone uploaded the show in three parts, and I've placed them below for your enjoyment.

The show is an amalgam of different infomercial and public access-style bits: a psychic, a man who promises you can make money by doing nothing, an exercise guru, and a juice machine. MCA, Ad Rock and Mike D appear throughout the videos, and I must say if they ever get sick of the music scene they wouldn't have any trouble doing comedy. The fellas have natural comedic timing and instincts, which shouldn't come as too much of a surprise for anyone who has seen their videos.My favorite video is number three. There's just something about using car polish to clean a banana that cracks me the heck up.

You've seen the ads. Those "Fitness Made Simple" commercials with the lame but catchy jingle. ("It's Fitness Made Simple...Made for real people!") Now John Basedow has made a promotional video for his new reality show.

Basically, the video is him walking around a mall, signing autographs, talking to people, and getting kisses from women (one woman says "he's sooo hot"). Many people also say he's "rockin' the hair," which I think is a good thing. I'm not quite sure why he says at one point that "the reality crew" with the camera has been following him around all day, like he doesn't know who it is. I mean, the video is for John Basedow TV, but I guess it gives it that reality "feel."

You don't find out until the end that the reality show they're talking about can be seen exclusively on...his MySpace page. Yeah, I have a reality show too. It can be seen exclusively in my living room every night. Of course, I'm just jealous. And his fitness strategies actually seem really logical and effective.

If you ask me what my favorite television show of all time is, I will answer, "ham sandwich." Then, after a long silence during which I'll realize I didn't hear you correctly, I'll tell you that Mystery Science Theater 3000 is my all-time favorite show. The series was given the boot in 1999, but despite that, if you listen to interviews with any of the cast members, they still get asked if the show will ever return with new episodes. It's been seven years, people, learn to let go. At any rate, most of the cast of that series have gone on to other projects, and head writer and second host Michael J. Nelson recently posted a hysterical essay about those "Juiceman" infomercials on his site. Apparently the juice-lovin' curmudgeon is an endless source of entertainment for Mike and his family. I haven't seen the infomercial in ages, but Nelson is right, his eyebrows do look like "mini versions of Ted Kennedy's hair."