TVSquad

Anna Johns asks a very important question -- with Chris gone, does anybody still care about American Idol? My answer is yes and no. Chris was my number one dude, and I'm destroyed that he's gone. The thrill of the game has left me. I no longer feel the shrill of excitement every Tuesday when Chris takes the stage. I am now filled with blood lust, and I thirst for the demise of Elliott. I don't blame America for Chris' untimely elimination. I blame Elliott. I'm not exactly sure why, but somehow he is at fault. It's certainly not me. Taylor deserves to be in the finale, and so did Chris. Katharine? Eh, I guess. Elliott? Not so much.

With Chris gone, I have a new reason to watch Idol. I want Taylor to destroy them. Destroy them all. When we first met Taylor, he seemed the most unlikely candidate for American Idol. He's got gray hair. He's kinda tubby. And he looks like he's taking a dump when when he sings. This whole season has been absurd, so why not end it with a fireworks display of absurdity. I want Elliott and Katharine to be buried alive under the avalanche of votes that Taylor will receive. I want every man, woman, and child to vote for Taylor. I want more Americans to vote for Taylor then there are actually in America. I want Mexicans to illegally swarm over the border like locusts, with their Cingular Wireless phones in hand, just so they can vote for Taylor. I want him to destroy those other two. I want Taylor to rise from Chris' fallen ashes and pour acid rain all over Elliott and Katharine. I know that being bitter over Chris won't bring him back, but it makes me feel a hell of a lot better.  

I'm not shocked at Ace getting the boot. His number has been up since he couldn't top "Father Figure." (Ugh, that was like the first week, right? And did you notice that Queen was not in his "Bad Day" montage? Ha ha ha!) But Chris in the bottom 3?!?!?! I suppose that America is to blame. We let him down. That's what Paula is going to tell us next Tuesday, I'm sure. But, I guess we are to blame. I didn't vote for Chris last night. I felt sorry for Ace, so I voted for him. It was a sympathy vote that I wish I could take back. I figured that Chris would slip into the bottom 3 at least once (before triumphantly winning this whole thing), but not until a later date. I know this sounds silly, and only confirms my complete absorption into AI addiction, but I felt a little bit nauseas when I saw Chris standing there next to Ace. The mere thought of Chris going home prematurely made me want to throw up. So, that confirms it -- I'm officially a member of Team Chris. I'm pledging my allegiance right now.