TVSquad

"Oh, goodness. Is this where they do Dancing with the Stars?"
-- Willie Ray Johnson, Brenda's momma

(S04E08) Here was an episode that epitomized what I like about The Closer. This was an excellent mystery. It was complicated and drew you into the chase. Like Brenda, you're wondering how it was done, why and by whom.

Of course, it didn't seem like it was going to be a heavy duty episode, not when the opening was all about Willie Ray and Clay's unexpected visit. That damn RV has brought Brenda's parents cross-country, even with gas at $4 a gallon!

Don't get me wrong, I like Barry Corbin and Frances Sternhagen. They're great actors, but the roles are so broadly drawn. The show uses them for comic relief, even though they can do drama brilliantly. The scenes at the film studio were too jokey to me, especially in light of the heinous crime scene that Brenda was investigating.

The murder reminded me of the O.J. Simpson case. It looked like Ryan -- an actor with anger management issues -- was the murderer. He lied and had a history of beating his wife. The sight of him with the gym bag and then those black gloves were all vaguely reminiscent of O.J. Of course, since he was the prime suspect, I never thought that he was the killer. Too obvious.

This is Spoilers Anonymous, a weekly column here at TV Squad where we'll supply you with the dirt on some of the more popular shows on the air. We'll never put spoilers up here on the main page in order to help the reformed stay unspoiled. If you have anything to add to the group, feel free to step up and let yourself be heard, either with our tips form or by emailing us at tvsquad at gmail dot com or call and leave a message at (775) 640-8479 - your anonymity is guaranteed, if you wish to remain as such.

Starting next week, Spoilers Anonymous will be published every Thursday. Because I was unable to publish the column in the past weeks due to vacation and a faulty Internet connection, this special edition of the column is slightly longer than usual and filled with spoilers released since the last column was published.

This week we have: 24, Big Love, Bones, Brothers & Sisters, CSI, Desperate Housewives, Friday Night Lights, Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, Heroes, House, How I Met Your Mother, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Lost, NCIS, Prison Break, Private Practice, Smallville and The Office. (SPOILERS FOLLOW!)

I used to be a huge ER fan. Back in the good ol' Dr. Doug Ross days, I wouldn't miss an episode. It was the first medical drama that I had ever really watched, and I paid attention to it like I was watching an educational video in med school.

This came in handy several years back when I was on a flight to Scotland. It was a long flight and I was trying to sleep when I heard a commotion. A middle-aged man a few rows ahead of me appeared to be choking. However, it quickly became apparent that he was having an allergic reaction that was causing his throat to close up. It was bad news all around, but luckily, there had been an episode of ER that dealt with a very similar situation. So what did I do? I grabbed a pen, took it apart, and jammed the tube into his throat, opening his airway and saving his life. True story.

Okay, none of that actually happened -- because HOSPITAL SHOWS ARE NOT REAL. Apparently, however, Italy doesn't think its residents understand this.

I've always been a fan of House, but last season's two-part finale, "House's Head" and "Wilson's Heart," are two of the best episodes that the series has ever done. So after such a stellar ending, I'm completely psyched for this season. I've been dying all summer to find out how 13's diagnosis is affecting her, what the fallout is from Amber's death, and most importantly, are we ever going to see Cameron and Chase again, except in passing?

The fifth season premiere airs on September 16, and we've included a couple of videos after the jump. Click through to find out at least partial answers to two of the questions I posted above.

Here are the new TV DVDs, in stores tomorrow.

There's actually nothing on this list I want to buy. I'm not into Hannah Montana, I've never seen an episode of Bleach, I wasn't a big Married with Children fan, and I haven't bought any previous seasons of Perry Mason, so I might actually save some money this week.

I like Chelsea Handler though. Not sure if it's worth buying Girls Behaving Badly just for her.

• Are You Afraid of the Dark? - Season 7
• Bleach - Season 2
• Camp Rock - Extended Rock Star Edition
• Dexter - Season 2
• Galaxy Rangers - Vol. 2
• George of the Jungle - Season 1
• Girls Behaving Badly - Chelsea Handler Exposed
• Gossip Girl - Season 1
• Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus - Best of Both Worlds 3-D Concert
• House - Season 4
• Justice League - Season 1 (Blu-Ray)
• Kenny vs. Spenny - Season 4 (Canada)
• Married with Children - Season 9
• Perry Mason - Season 3, Vol. 1
• Recount
• Spider-Man - Dr. Octopus
• Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles - Season 1
• Transformers - Season 1
• Wayside - Season 1
• William Tell - Best Of

Is there a bigger star in the world right this moment than Michael Phelps? He's poised to break Mark Spitz's record seven gold medals in one Olympics. He's already the most honored Olympic champion of all times, having won more gold medals than some entire countries.

Jeremy Schaap was singing his praises on ESPN this morning. Michael Phelps is tall, fit, good looking and has the makings of humongous success. Can't you just see him as a TV star?

As Rich pointed out, being an Olympic champion can sometimes be a launching pad for a career on TV. For most, the fit isn't exactly right, but I think that that was the fault of the producers back then, not the Olympians.

Therefore, I'm going to help Michael and those TV bigwigs with a few ideas. Here's four existing shows that should be writing scripts for Michael Phelps right away, and one remake that's right up his alley.

Back in May -- remember that far back -- Isabelle wrote about the fact that David Shore, creator of House, was contemplating a new show. It was a spinoff of House, but not a medical show. It was going to be in the private eye genre.

Newark Star-Ledger columnist Alan Sepinwall (with Dan Feinberg) did an interview with David recently and found out some more information about the spinoff.

"We brought in a character, partway through the year, [actor] Michael Weston as this private investigator House goes to. The spinoff would be less of a spinoff, it would be more us using House to launch it. It would be an independent world. A character out of the House mold, but definitely different."

Here are the weekly TV ratings, by number of viewers.

Anyone else sick of the summer? These are, as the cliche goes, the dog days. I'm sick of seeing America's Got Talent in the top slot, all of the CBS cop shows (repeats, no less), and reality/game shows. Flashpoint got in the top 20 again on its new Thursday night at 10pm slot.

1. America's Got Talent (NBC)
2. Wipeout (ABC)
3. Two and a Half Men (CBS)

Here are the weekly TV ratings, by number of viewers.

What, no America's Got Talent in the top spot or Wipeout in the #2 spot this week? Nope, thanks to FOX's All-Star Game. Wipeout fell all the way to #7, beaten by repeats of Criminal Minds and CSI.

CBS' Flashpoint came in at #18, which explains why they moved Swingtown to Fridays at 10 and put Flashpoint on Thursdays at 10.

1. MLB All-Star Game (FOX)
2. America's Got Talent (NBC)
3. MLB All-Star Pre-Game Show (FOX)

The Emmy nominations will be announced tomorrow morning at 8:30am, and I'll be live-blogging the announcement, so come back here at that time for all the news. Well, actually, you won't have to "come back here" if you never leave, right? So please keep TV Squad open in a separate window as you do the rest of your web surfing and keep hitting refresh for the latest news. Thank you.

I'm sure a lot of the usual suspects will be in the mix when they announce the nominees: Lost, House, Desperate Housewives, The Wire, Hugh Laurie, Boston Legal, etc. But there are several shows and actors that I'm really pulling for and should get nominations, if the world is fair. My list after the jump.

Here are the weekly TV ratings, by number of viewers.

Doing the ratings during the summer is rather boring. America's Got Talent and Wipeout are on top again, and the rest of it is the usual mix of other reality shows and game shows and the CBS lineup of crime crime crime, which even gets big ratings when they're repeated, for some reason. Even the newest crime drama Flashpoint grabbed the #15 slot with its premiere, and it's on Friday nights.

1. America's Got Talent (NBC)
2. Wipeout (ABC)

Here are the weekly TV ratings, by number of viewers.

NBC must be really happy that it's summer. With their reality shows and reality competitions, it's the only way they can get the top spot in the ratings. ABC's Wipeout continues to be strong, though I Survived A Japanese Game Show must be losing a lot of viewers. I'm really surprised that repeats of shows like Criminal Minds, 60 Minutes, and all of the CSIs continue to do so well in the summer.

1. America's Got Talent (NBC)
2. Wipeout (ABC)

Another day, another list of 10 semifinalists from the Emmys. This time, it's the Best Actor in a Drama.

There are a lot of the usual suspects on the list (which will be knocked down to five nominees in the next round), including actors from Dexter, Mad Men, Grey's Anatomy, Friday Night Lights, Breaking Bad, and House. One show that's not represented is Lost. I thought Matthew Fox did some great work this season, especially his drunk/screwed-up scenes.

After the jump, the list of the ten semifinalists (also check out those in contention for Best Actress - Comedy, Best Supporting Actor - Drama, Best Comedy, and Best Drama).

Here are the weekly ratings, by number of viewers.

Yes, NBC had four shows in the top 20 this week, but it took the summer and reality and/or reality game shows to get there, including America's Got Talent, The Baby Borrowers, and Celebrity Family Feud. ABC's new game shows, Wipeout and I Survived A Japanese Game Show, both made the top ten.

I'm surprised Hell's Kitchen isn't higher. #14 is great, I just thought it would do better during the summer (though it does well on its night). 60 Minutes' repackaged repeat segments continue to do well too.

1. America's Got Talent (NBC)
2. Wipeout (ABC)
3. 60 Minutes (CBS)

Remember back in February when we told you that Edie Falco was signed for a new dark situation comedy from Showtime about a harried nurse?

Well, they've started filming the show in New York and given it a tentative title, Nurse Jackie. What's more, the cast surrounding Edie includes some familiar faces.

Nurse Jackie will have a boyfriend and he will be played by Paul Schulze. The name may not be familiar, but the face sure is. Paul was Father Phil on The Sopranos, the priest who spent a lot of time with Carmella and had her thinking they were going to replay The Thornebirds.

On this Showtime series, he's Eddie and he works in the hospital in the pharmacy. That's important because reportedly Edie's character has a problem with drugs.

What's this, she's a female House? Could she be popping Vicodin as prodigiously as he does? Could anyone?