TVSquad

Everyone who has been laughing at the idea of Fran Drescher taking over Hillary Clinton's Senate seat for the state of New York, you can stop laughing now. It's not that wild an idea, not when you consider that Fred Grandy -- Gopher from The Love Boat -- was a Congressman from Iowa, and pro wrestler Jesse Ventura was the Governor of Minnesota, and there's a really good chance that Saturday Night Live alum Al Franken (remember Stuart Smalley?) has won the Senate seat for Minnesota, too. (They're still recounting the votes!)

Oh, and let's not forget the Governator, Arnold Schwarzenegger from the great state of California. In other words, why not Senator Fran Drescher!

Children's television is the ultimate pacifier. Where else in the world can a terrible, horrific monster that destroys both life and property with nary a whiff of sympathy be turned into a soft, cuddly character who has his own line of soft, cuddly dolls being sold at the local Wal-Mart? It's only later in life, after they've adjusted to these de-fanged monsters, do they realize that their beliefs were so wrong. Aaaannnddd, that's where the therapy comes in.

But, we're not here to talk about the emotional problems that are paralyzing you today. We're here to talk about those vampires, ghosts and mummies that were stripped down and made to be funny, clumsy and even musically oriented. After the jump you'll see a few examples of what I mean. Don't worry, they won't scare you...they've been homogenized for your nightmare-free pleasure.

Since we had so much fun examining the greatest mysteries of Cheers, I've decided to make this a quasi-regular feature. The next classic show to come under scrutiny is The Love Boat, the 1977 - 1986 Aaron Spelling series that involved water, Mexican paradises, and everyone from David Hasselhoff to George Burns getting busy on the Lido deck.

I used to watch the show just about every Saturday night, especially during its early years (it was a big event when Julie went from her bowl cut to the feathered look... I think it coincided with my very first months of pre-puberty). At the time, I just took the show at face value, but as the years have gone on, aspects of life on the Pacific Princess made me scratch my head, starting with a fact of life that just about everyone took for granted: