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Smallville: Beast

Smallville(S02E20) When the season began, I had hopes that it would progress the series beyond its high school thinking and emo roots. Sadly, tonight's episode proved me wrong. It also proved that people in their mid-20's (as Clark and Chloe are, supposedly) can still act like self-absorbed teenagers until the correct, or indeed any, circumstances.

I had hoped that some progress was being made in the beginning when Clark's half-eaten carcass was hanging in the Talon basement, but that ended up being a (COP OUT!) dream. I did note the red "S" symbol drawn on his chest as it was on the pilot episode of the series.

Continue reading Smallville: Beast

Smallville: Abyss

Smallville(S08E09) Apologies to all for the tardiness of this review. My local cable station preempted Smallville with a football game, thus showing the priority the show is given by my local CW affiliate as compared to sports.

This episode contained a lot of retro-Smallville. From the little things, such as photos of Martha Kent and Lionel Luthor and a mention of Lana, to the big things such as complete reenactments of scenes from various past episodes (and scenes from Chloe and Clark's childhood). But that's what you get when Chloe is losing her memory in an episode that seems like a cross between The Matrix and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

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Will Smallville season eight be sans Chloe as well?

Allison Mack as Chloe SullivanThey've lost Lex Luthor and Lana Lang as regulars, and now it looks like Chloe Sullivan might also be swept from Season 8 of Smallville. TV Guide reports that Allison Mack, the actress who plays Chloe, is in negotiations for her contract.

This could go either way. The show is suffering from the loss of Michael Rosenbaum and Kristen Kreuk as regulars, which is likely why Mack's people are now trying to negotiate her contract. As the article mentions, without Chloe it becomes Lois and Clark: The Early Years.

Continue reading Will Smallville season eight be sans Chloe as well?

Smallville's Chloe to appear in the comics

Allison MackWhen Smallville premiered a little over seven years ago, a few fans were unhappy about the addition of Chloe Sullivan, a character that never appeared in any Superman comics, movies, etc. As time went by, fans embraced this Smallville-created character to a point that they were unhappy when rumors of her being written off the show a while back were leaked on the web. Luckily, it never happened and Chloe Sullivan not only stayed on the show, got a job at the Daily Planet but was given a power.

TV Guide reports that DC Comics' Superman will take cue from The CW's show and include Chloe in an upcoming edition of the comic book.

Continue reading Smallville's Chloe to appear in the comics

Smallville: Wrath

Smallville: Wrath
(S07E07)
Okay, this was the first time I ever watched Smallville and had my jaw drop. Seriously. Why? Well, I'm glad you asked. Let's examine the facts: Lana and Clark are deep into dating mode. Plus, she's been staying at the Kent farm with him ever since she's returned from the dead. However, they've apparently not be able to um ... consummate that relationship because of Clark's superpowers. I guess if he gets amorous with someone, he might accidentally hurt them. Not to mention burn the place down, which he used to do when he'd get turned on.

While it's not clear how they've been getting around this, they sure didn't have to worry about it on this episode. Clark gets struck by lightning while close to some kryptonite, and his powers get transferred to someone else. Yes, again. However, this time he gets to keep his powers, and Lana is the beneficiary of the souped-up abilities. How do they celebrate this event? By knocking boots. Literally. They have such powerful sex that it causes seismic waves across Smallville. In fact, they practically destroy the Kent farm in the process. Holy cow.

Continue reading Smallville: Wrath

Smallville: Bizarro (season premiere)

Smallville: Bizarro
(S07E01) "I'm like you, only more bizarre."

Somebody Saaaaaavvvvveeeee meeeeeeee ... from interminably long summer breaks from TV shows. I really wondered when this day would come, and it has finally arrived. When we last left our hero(es), Clark literally had an out-of-body experience and split into two halves. Thus was Bizarro born. He's like the Dark Clark (Kal) from seasons past, except he's got a much deeper voice. Testosterone kicks in on Smallville, apparently. Plus, Bizarro Clark has that jagged, crystalline face that you've come to expect from all the comic books, but it pops in and out, like he just needs some Clearasil or something.

It's refreshing that this season opens up right where we left off, and plus seeing Clark save that little kid and his dad in total Superman-style makes it all worth it. Was that serious heat-vision action or what? Finally, it seems like he's finally getting ready to wear the cape. That little kid's "whoa" was a great capper to the opening teaser. Thank you, Smallville writers, thank you.

Continue reading Smallville: Bizarro (season premiere)

Someone's gonna die on Smallville

Smallville -- who is gonna die?

Can you smell it in the air? That's right, the strong scent of May sweeps. Some things are always true, April showers bring May flowers, and May sweeps bring big events on TV. Smallville hasn't been immune in the past, which is why Jonathan Kent is (sadly) no longer with us. But who else is going to kick the bucket?

Sources say that one of the four major characters, Clark, Chloe, Lana or Lex will die by the end of this season. Now, through simple deductive reasoning, I think we can assume that it isn't going to be Clark, since that would end the series pretty quick. We know Lex has to be Clark's eternal nemesis, so that takes him out of the running as well.

Continue reading Someone's gonna die on Smallville

Smallville: Combat

Smallville: Combat
(S06E17)
You know you're in for a very special Smallville when it starts out with a WWF-style cage match, an extremely gratuitous shot of some very large boobs, and an all-out brawl between Clark and a Zoner who seems stronger than he is. It's like a Bizarro world version of the show starring everyone's favorite Kryptonian. Zowie.

Basically, it's Fight Club meets Smallville meets ... well, Superheroes Gone Wild. Toss in Lois chomping at the bit for a story, and you've got half the makings of a regular old episode of Lois & Clark, or is it just me? Although I don't remember Teri Hatcher donning red leather and claiming to be a wayward stripper from down the street who has a penchant for loving the ladies. Plus, did you catch the way Lois claimed she does a killer "Stars and Stripes" routine? Hello throwback to an old episode.

Continue reading Smallville: Combat

Smallville: Promise

Smallville - Promise
(S06E16) The wedding bells that have been ringing in the promos for this episode also sound like funeral bells ringing, is that a coincidence? We may never know. Anyhow, it's finally here, the Lex & Lana wedding that we've all been dreading/waiting for.

Did that scene of Lex and Lana watching the ultrasound creep anyone else out? It's scary to know what might come ripping out of that womb. I keep picturing that scene from Alien over and over in my head. I also hope that the photo Clark whipped out the window didn't end up decapitating someone in Malaysia. He really put some heat behind it.

Continue reading Smallville: Promise

Smallville: Trespass

Smallville: Trespass
(S06E14)
Lana has a stalker! Or alternatively titled, "The Lana Lingerie Issue" since she's in a nightie for about half the show. How long has it been since we've had one of these episodes? Quite a while. This stalker likes to send camera phone pictures to Lana on her Sprint Product Placement Powered Phone. However, when that phone has potentially earth-shattering evidence on it, you don't just hand it over to your megalomaniacal boyfriend and tell him to check it out. Seriously, what camera phone takes pictures that are that clear, especially when you blow 'em up to an 8" x 10"? Anyhow, nice work Lana, maybe you'll get yourself back to that girl who had so much spunk and moxie.

However, once again Chloe is stuck in the middle of things again while she checks out Lana's picture, and interfaces with Clark. How can she stand it? She just needs to spill the beans to Lana, thereby saving everyone the trouble of running around in circles. However, knowing Clark's secret gets you one of two things: either you don't appear much on the show anymore, or you get relegated to Pete Ross-land -- never to be seen again. They don't even get postcards or phone calls from wherever he got exiled to.

Continue reading Smallville: Trespass

Smallville: Crimson

Crimson - Smallville love-fest

(S06E13)
Valentine's Day comes to Smallville about two weeks before the rest of the country. Why can't these episodes come on closer to the actual date of the holiday? Okay, I'm griping too much. We've got the return of Red Kryptonite, and it's about darn time. It comes at the right time, too ... given the fact that Lois has gotten a bit itchy in her relationship with Oliver Queen, and Lana is about to go fully over to the dark side and marry Lex Luthor, not to mention have his baby. That's getting a bit too close to the whole Anakin/Padme relationship, ain't it?

The whole little Zoltar machine slash Gypsy slash matchmaker woman who just gives Lois the magical lipstick was wayyyyy to much of a plot device for me. It's like the writers were in a post-Chinese food coma and decided to just have some character waltz in and hand it over. Was it too convenient? Am I griping about the small stuff too much again? Most likely. Granted, the alternative was probably having a department of LuthorCorp working on cosmetics, and some wacky scientist decides to add meteor rocks and yadda yadda yadda. K-powered shampoo and shaving gel for the world.

Continue reading Smallville: Crimson

Smallville: Labyrinth

The Clark of Oz. It's all in your head.
(S06E12)
Or as I like to call it, "The Martian Manhunter Show!" All Martians, all the time. Either that, or "One Flew Over the Clark Kent's Nest," except we didn't get a Nurse Ratchett, unfortunately. You can tell right from the beginning that this is all taking place in Clark's mind, so it has the ring of "ripoff" to me. Basically, it's like holodeck episode of Star Trek: TNG. Although some good things came out of those (Dixon Hill, Moriarty, Minuet) so I'm not going to declare full shenanigans ... maybe only halfsies.

Someone needs to YouTube together all of the scenes of Clark working on farm equipment and make it a commercial for Clark's Tractor Repair. We must have seen him work on that thing a million times, but I don't remember him ever turning over any soil in the north forty. What gives, Smallville? The writers need to think about dropping the whole Kent Farm charade and just have them live on the land. Martha's a senator, which must pay fairly decent wages, right?

Continue reading Smallville: Labyrinth

Smallville: Subterranean

Clark goes digging in the dirt on Subterranean
(S06E09)
Is this Children of the Corn, or Smallville? Some kids are being forced to work on a farm, and if they try to escape something that looks like Sonic the Hedgehog chases them down and snuffs 'em down in the dirt. Talk about a motivation to keep on digging. They were smuggled across the border to work ... in Smallville? Since when is the Mexican border near Kent and company?

Continue reading Smallville: Subterranean

Smallville: The Tomb

allison mack; smallville; chloe sullivanI was afraid of this. Every other season of Smallville has suffered from this same type of ailment. There are these amazing, poignant episodes that crop up a couple of times a year (normally in November, February and May; go figure), and the rest of the season is a lot of fluff and filler. This season, as a whole, has been amazing. Even the episodes that weren't the cornerstones had huge character development that was being used later on. For the first time, this felt like an "epic", like the huge origin of Superman, instead of his weekly comic book adventures as a young man. Everything seemed to build to Reckoning, the 100th episode two weeks ago, and since that amazing event, the show has been, well, pretty "meh". On with the show!

Continue reading Smallville: The Tomb

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