TVSquad

The third most important story in the Entertainment section of my news page this morning is this: which stars are going to present awards at this year's Emmy Awards ceremony (September 21 on ABC). And to that I say a big ... who cares?

Every year, in the weeks leading up to the Emmys, we hear about which stars are going to present awards. I've always found it odd because the people they say are going to present are, you know, TV stars. Seriously, this is the Emmy Awards, and like the Oscars or the Grammys, I expect the people who have something to do with television (maybe the people who actually star on the shows!) to either present awards, introduce segments of the show, or even host. Yeah, it's mildly interesting that William Petersen and Laurence Fishburne will present an award together, since Fishburne is taking over for Petersen on CSI, but it's not that big of a deal. And it's certainly not a big deal that America Fererra and Vanessa Williams are going to present an award or that Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Hugh Laurie are going to present awards - separately. I would assume that these current TV stars will be involved in some way, but even if they aren't, why is it news?

Oh, Marc St. James, how are you so fabulous? Do your multiple layers of plaid infuse you with superstar powers? Does hanging around all the beautiful people of Ugly Betty automatically make you awesome by association? Ah, the real fabulous answer most likely lies in the fact that fabulous Marc is portrayed by the fabulous actor, Michael Urie.

It's tough to shine on-screen when one's partner is often the ultra-glamorous superstar Vanessa L. Williams, but Urie manages to hold his own just fine. Dare I say it, he even manages to outshine her every once in a while. I guess the folks at TLC saw something in him too, because he will soon be on the channel as the host of their new reality show, Miss America: Reality Check (premiering January).

I've only seen two episodes of Extras, the HBO comedy starring Ricky Gervais. The show just ended, but not before Gervais got in a scathing monologue about how celebrities act and why the public is wrong to idolize them. It's December 20 and I thought I already had all of my favorite TV moments of 2007, but this one makes it just under the wire.

The show has always been listed as a "comedy," but there's a lot of serious, painful truth in the show too, as illustrated in what Gervais has to say during an appearance on a reality show within the show. This isn't just the Andy Millman character talking, it's Gervais himself. You'll nod your head in agreement, and maybe even cringe a little bit. What a way to end the series.

People enjoy rap, and people enjoy reality television. So: why not combine them?

That seems to be the thought process behind Rapping with the Stars, a new reality series that could be popping up on MTV that, according to Variety, "features teams squaring off in [a] range of rap-oriented musical challenges."

Those "teams" consist of, naturally, a rapper and a celebrity. I wonder, though, how many rap-oriented challenges can there be? Other than freestyle, performing someone else's rap, or doing your own rap, what's left? Is there some kind of rap endurance race in which rappers must perform Run-DMC tunes while sprinting and pole vaulting cross country? Because there should be, I'd totally watch that.

If this show does become as popular as Dancing with the Stars, perhaps we'll start seeing more and more with the Stars-style shows, none of which I will watch.

Splitting Images is a celebrity lookalike company in the U.K. They have a ton of people that can be hired for your next party, corporate event, or other entertainment-related function, though some of the lookalikes look more like the celebs than others.

For example, these guys look like Rowan Atkinson so much that they could probably commit some crime and he'd be blamed for it, and this guy could probably do the same for Bing Crosby, if he wasn't, you know, dead and all. But a lot of these people seem to be stretching things a bit. Do these woman really look enough like Pamela Anderson? And does this guy really look like Mr. Spock? I guess wearing a costume and/or having a pic taken in a particular setting helps.

Of course, you could get a Leo Sayer lookalike, though hiring the real Leo Sayer now would probably be cheaper now.

[via Marty Beckerman]

My favorite part of Real Time With Bill Maher is the last segment, "New Rules." It's a segment devoted to looking at things a little bit differently, offering new rules for current events, celebrities, and politicians. Maher released a great book last year with the same title.

After the jump is a clip (from Salon) of the latest "New Rules" segment of the HBO Friday night show. It's entitled "Half-Cocked," and I would usually say to you that the clip is NSFW, but you can probably guess that from the title.

Shortly after I moved to Hollywood, I went on a very important audition. I didn't know it at the time but it would be an audition that changed my perception of Hollywood.

It was the afternoon and I was meeting with the casting director for a straight to cable movie. For this particular audition, I was wearing, what I call, my Masters jacket. It's a green suit jacket that looks great on me, if I do say so myself. The reading went great and I was asked to come back later to audition for the director. As I was leaving, the casting director said to me, "Nice jacket." to which I replied, "Thanks, I just won the Masters." She laughed and I figured that this audition was in the bag. Then came the callback.

I know, you might be thinking, who is Stephen Talbot and why should I care what he thinks of the TV news biz? Well, Talbot is a producer and writer for PBS' Frontline (his new episode, News War, debuted earlier this week), but that's not why I'm posting this. I'll explain that after the jump. In the meantime, go read the chat he has at The Washington Post's site and look at his picture closely. Where have you seen him before?

Talbot has a lot of interesting things to say about the news industry. He likes local news, but doesn't like it when they focus on just local stories, fears that people will just wake up one day and wonder why the only news they get is stuff about Anna Nicole and Britney, and he explains why Connie Chung gave up her great reporting career to do...well, whatever the hell she's doing now.

Oh, where have you seen him before?

While I love all of the stations and choices we have now, I sometimes wish we could go back to just having a handful of channels to choose from. It was so much easier back then: shows started in September and ended in May, and the summer was for reruns, specials, and going outside. But now it's hard to keep track of it all. We have 300 networks and 1000 shows that start, well, basically anytime they want to.

Like The Showbiz Show. The Comedy Central celeb/gossip/news satire hosted by David Spade returns on March 15. Head on over to TV Filter to check out some video with Spade talking about Britney Spears.

Also note that not only is this show returning for its third season, Spade also has a Top 20 show over on CBS, Rules of Engagement. Not a good time to be a David Spade hater. I've always liked the guy. (And if you didn't see it, he live blogged the Oscars last night.)

Snarky McSarcasm, or as we call him, David Spade, is returning with a third season of The Showbiz Show Thursday, March 15 at 10:30pm.

I have to ask you, TV Squad readers, does anyone still watch this show? I watched the first couple episodes and caught a few of the later ones, but ultimately I just can't bring myself to watch another show that pokes fun at celebrity excess. We've become so saturated with celebrity news and gossip that I can't stand to hear about it, even if the point of the show is to make fun of our obsession with it.

Also, it's difficult for me to get past the feeling that Spade doesn't seem that into what he's doing. When he did his "Hollywood Minute" segment on Saturday Night Live, that detachment worked to his benefit. His comical disdain for all things Hollywood is what made that segment so funny, but now that "comical disdain" seems to have grown into genuine bitterness. When I watch him now, I always feel like he wants to be somewhere else, and, consequently, so do I.

Anne Heche sure loves 'em and leaves 'em. ET is reporting the Men in Trees star has left husband Coley Laffoon (with whom she has a son) for co-star James Tupper. Heche and Tupper's characters are romantically involved on the show.

But here's the problem with co-stars hooking up: they often eventually break up. And when they do, it sure causes havoc with TV storylines.

Once upon a time, January was just a long cold month that filled me with regret and longing. I regretted the holiday over-eating and over-spending. And longed for warmer weather and something (anything) to distract me from the bleakness of winter.

In 2003, that all changed. Season 2 of American Idol appeared on the horizon giving me -- and the rest of America -- HOPE. Now, every January, American Idol triumphantly returns with blaring trumpets and great spectacle to awaken the American viewing public out of our winter stupor.

I think that The Internet Movie Database is a fantastic resource. Really, it's invaluable when you write for a television blog. But they've made some changes recently that I just hate.

They started adding a ton of info for specific episodes of TV series and for each season of a TV series, which on the surface sounds like a good idea. But in the process of doing that they've buried the main cast list for the TV shows! You used to be able to go to a TV show, say a show like Outlaws that I did a story about recently, and see the cast list right there on the front page. But no more. I spent about an hour trying to find the damn cast list, but got various dead ends, including "Full Cast and Crew" and "Episodes Cast." You'd think the main cast list would be there, but you'd be wrong. You have to click on "Season" and then the episode title. It's not like that for every show, but it is for many of them.

To quote Nancy Kerrigan, why, why, why??

CBS' Innertube broadband site has an occasionally interesting series called Animate This! in which stars from different series tell stories about being in the industry which are then animated for comic effect. Some of the stories, such as Jennifer Love Hewitt's recollection of singing as a young child at a Texas fair, aren't that interesting, while others, such as Jeff Probst story of scuba diving while taping Survivor and ending up away from the boat with producer Mark Burnett and circled by a shark like the movie Open Water, are somewhat more gripping. The series is animated by Renegade Animation, the same studio that does Hi HI Puffy Ami Yumi on Cartoon Network.

[via Cold, Hard Flash]

Here's a bit o' fun for your Sunday. I don't know how long it's been around, but I recently found the Dead Celebrity Soulmate search on the Biography Web site. You select the qualities you want in a dead lover, and the program matches you with the perfect deceased mate. One of the women it matched me with was painter Frida Kahlo. Lord knows I'm a sucker for artistic chicks with a unibrow. If I were gay, it would have matched me up with Edgar Allan Poe or Vincent Van Gogh. Either way it looks like I have a thing for artistic types. Apparently this transcends my sexual preference. I hope we all learned something about me today. Anyway, try it out and let me know who the dead love of your life is in the comments. Just stay away from Frida, she's mine.

Related:
What celeb do you look like?