TVSquad

That's his salary as a police forensics guy, not as a killer.

That's just one of the many revelations in this article about TV character salaries. CareerBuilder.com figured out what each person would make in real-life. For example, Samantha from Samantha Who? makes around $145,000 a year as the VP of a real estate company.

Not sure about the numbers for Mad Men's Don Draper though. It says he would make $41,000, but I'm guessing that means if he was doing it today, not in the early 1960s (because that would be a massive amount of money then). But he's the Creative Director at an ad agency and got a raise, so I'm pretty sure he'd make more than that. Olive on Pushing Daisies would make around $15,000 or so as a waitress (though she'd probably make more if she worked at an upscale restaurant). Other people on the list include Christine from The New Adventures of Old Christine and Olivia Benson from Law and Order: SVU.

Characters not on the list that I'm curious about: Liz Lemon, Michael Scott, and anyone from Heroes, because they never seem to be actually working.

Do you have a special person in your life that is eternally optimistic?

When you've got a bad case of the Mondays, is there some annoyingly perky person at your workplace who is always chipper and talking about what a great day it is?

Then perhaps you can relate to this commercial as much as I did.

I'm talking about Betty Suarez, not the actress (America Ferrera) who plays her on the hit ABC show. Every year one of the financial sites figures out how much money various TV characters make a year. Last year we discovered that Homer Simpson makes $67,422 at the power plant. This year's list comes from CareerBuilder.com.

I'm not surprised to find out that Boston Legal's Denny Crane makes $210,000, but I was rather shocked that Cold Case's Lilly Rush only makes $44,000 a year. She solves cold cases, for pete's sake! Hopefully the benefits are good.

The list also has the salaries for Arthur Branch on Law and Order, Jim on According To Jim, Pam on The Office, and many others.

Update: Betty Suarez makes $37, 810 a year. Now you don't even have to click on the link and all the world is at peace again.

Another installment from CareerBuilder's jungle office, and this one improves on the training seminar bit. The guy walking on hot coals and chanting "I will improve my pie charts" was hilarious. Give them an extra point for the knock-out receptionist too. It's late in the game, and we need those kind of details.

The wedgie as positive feedback, the falling guy screaming "I'll be a team playerrrrrrrrr", and the kicker line from the receptionist, "Mr. Watts will see you now. Please remove your shirt." were all very well done. As was the reaction from the nervous employee about to be evaluated. Still not up to working with chimps, but getting closer.

The strange work environment is something we've seen before, and I think it's been done better with the working with chimps series. This was still a good ad though. Nice location, and well acted. Really nice attention to detail with the net falling on the escaping employees.

I'm sure most of us that have been in the workforce for any length of time can feel for the desire to not be part of another training seminar. I particularly liked the guy at reception casually reminding the fleeing workers, "Sign out please." Nice touch. The lemming like ending was perfect.

Last week's winners:

3rd to Toby OB: "She opened the package, never suspecting it to be the first stage of the invasion by the inhabitants of Pluto, who were seeking revenge for being called a "dwarf planet" "
2nd to Jamie: "Oh, good. I don't have to swallow it--it's a suppository."
1st to Brent McKee: "Rory just couldn't believe that her grandmother Emily had sent her this, complete with detailed operating instructions and a note that said she'd been using one just like it for years."

... and a special hats off to orimental, who reminded me that it's the one year anniversary of Subtle Subtitles. Cool!

This week, a scene from the season premiere of Lost: