TVSquad

Barry Bonds and his bronzed marshmallow head will be coming soon to HBO, according to this Variety report. Based on the succinctly titled book Game of Shadows: Barry Bonds, BALCO and the Steroids Scandal That Rocked Professional Sports, the HBO Films project will be directed and co-written by veteran sports film director Ron Shelton (Bull Durham, Cobb and Tin Cup). His Tin Cup writing partner John Norville will script with him again.

Bonds is accused of taking illegal performance enhancing drugs to boost his game after the McGwire/Sosa home run record season. He eventually set both the single season and all-time home run records. He's currently indicted on charges of perjury and obstruction of justice for allegedly lying under oath when he told a grand jury that he didn't take any performance enhancing drugs. He was just trying to make his head as big as everyone kept saying it already was.

According to this article in The New York Times, a large number of ESPN staffers used one of those "all hands" meetings corporate muckety-mucks like to hold to vent about what they see as problems with the channel airing a reality series that stars Barry Bonds.

About half the staffers, including Bonds' "personal ESPN reporter", Pedro Gomez, were concerned that, because ESPN paid for the rights to produce and broadcast this series, it's journalistic integrity might be called into question with regards to stories about the controversial slugger. Also of concern was the fact that Bonds may use the show as a platform to rip on other ESPN personalities who criticize him for his "alleged" use of steroids, details of which are spelled out in the new book Game of Shadows. Finally, staffers also wanted to know if ESPN Original Entertainment, the division of the network that will oversee the show, will sit on any breaking news that happens to come up while they're in the process of making the show.

Mike Wallace was even sucked into the argument; he was at the meeting to discuss his interview methods (he was paid for the appearance), and many of the questions to him revolved around the Bonds situation. Mike's reaction? Well,  "You've got to be kidding" pretty much tells you all you need to know, doesn't it?

Man, I really hate Barry Bonds. Hate him, hate him, HATE him with every fiber of my sports-fan being. It's not hard to figure out why: he's a jerk who has no regard for his teammates or fans, much less the press (and I mean, really, who cares how much of an a-hole a guy is to the press?). He "allegedly" has been juicing up for the last five years and is now on the brink of breaking a hallowed record that no one outside of San Francisco and the Bonds family wants to see him break: Hank Aaron's all-time home run record.

So what better subject is there for a reality show? Well, at least ESPN thinks so. They'll be following Bonds around as the 42-year-old Giants slugger goes after Aaron's record, which he is 48 dingers away from breaking. According to this article, the show will premiere on ESPN2 on April 4 with an hour-long show, then air half-hour long shows every Tuesday throughout the season.

I myself am looking forward to the episode when Bonds decides to retire early because his knee can't take the pounding from his bloated body, but that's just me.

Maybe Barry Bonds had the song, "Opposites Attract" in his head when he decided to dress up like Paula Abdul for a recent publicity stunt. If anything, Barry Bonds is the Simon Cowell of baseball.

Why was Barry Bonds all dressed up like Paula Abdul, you ask? He was judging a mock singing contest for a charity event in Arizona. Nobody expected Bonds to dress in drag, so he got quite a response from fans and his teammates.

Said Bonds, "I'll never tell my wife to hurry up anymore, because it took me forever to get ready. I couldn't get the hair right."

I think he looks more like Star Jones.