TVSquad

• CBS has March Madness all night.
• TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon all night.
• At 8, NBC reruns the ER finale, if you missed it.
• TCM has Take the Money and Run at 8.
• At 9, FOX has a new America's Most Wanted.
• Lifetime has the movie Nora Roberts' High Noon at 9.
• Hallmark has the movie Love Takes Wing at 9.
• Also at 9: FUSE has the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony.
• At 10, History Channel has a new Ax Men.
• At 11:30, NBC has a new Saturday Night Live, with Seth Rogen.
• At 1AM, Cartoon Network has a new Bleach.

Check your local TV listings for more.

I've always had this theory that even the worst songs in the world can sound better if you play them on an acoustic guitar. You can take the most insipid sitcom theme song or the most bombastic heavy metal tune, and when you play the song on an acoustic guitar, it suddenly becomes more profound, more deep, just better somehow.

The folks over at Best Week Ever have complied a great set of videos that show people doing the theme songs to various TV shows on various instruments. Some of them are pretty straightforward with normal instruments (for example, a small orchestra doing the Muppet Show theme and Family Matters done on piano), while others are rather odd and unexpected, like the parrot doing the Andy Griffith Show theme or The Love Boat performed on a theremin. After the jump, one of my favorites: the theme to Baywatch performed by a guy on an acoustic guitar. He even has his shirt off like a lifeguard and shows pics from the show.

I still don't get that MacGyver theme on the ruler though.

• TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon all night.
• Sci-Fi is showing Star Trek: The Next Generation all night.
• At 7, G4 has a Watchmen debate on a new Attack of the Show.
• At 8, ABC has the season premiere of Dancing with the Stars, then the series premiere of Castle.
• CBS has a new Big Bang Theory at 8, followed by new episodes of How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men, Rules of Engagement, and CSI: Miami.
• NBC has new episodes of Chuck, Heroes, and Medium.
• FOX has a new House at 8, then a new 24.
• ABC Family has a new Secret Life of the American Teenager at 8, followed by a new Kyle XY.
• TLC has two new episodes of Little People, Big World at 8.
• At 9, USA has a new Monday Night RAW.
• At 10, Travel Channel has a new Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations.

Check your local TV listings for more.

After the jump, the late night talk shows.

• TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon all night.
• At 7, ABC has a new America's Funniest Home Videos, followed by The Santa Clause 2.
  
• CBS has a new 60 Minutes at 7, then the season finale of Survivor and the Survivor Live Reunion Show.
• NBC has a new Football Night in America at 7, followed by the Giants/Cowboys game.
• At 8, ABC Family has the movie Snow 2 Brain Freeze.
• HGTV has Holiday Windows 2008 at 8.
• Also at 8: Showtime has a new Brotherhood, then new episodes of Dexter and Californication.
• At 9, Lifetime has the movie Together Again For The First Time.
• Nickelodeon has two Christmas episodes of Home Improvement at 9.
• Spike has the Spike TV Video Game Awards 2008 at 9.
• At 10, BBC America has a new Skins.
• At 10:30, Food Network has a new Throwdown with Bobby Flay.
• At 11:30, Cartoon Network has a new Robot Chicken.
• At 12:15am, Cartoon Network has a new Drinky Crow Show.

Check your local TV listings for more.

• TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon tonight while CMT has a Scott Baio Is 46...And Pregnant marathon.
• At 8, CBS has a new Big Brother.
• NBC has a new, two hour Last Comic Standing at 8, followed by a new Fear Itself.
• FOX has new episodes of Don't Forget The Lyrics and So You Think You Can Dance.
• At 8:30, HGTV has a new Myles of Style, followed by new episodes of Rate My Space, Extreme Living, and House Hunters.
• At 9, History Channel has a new Modern Marvels, then a new episode of The Works.
• At 10, ABC has a the season finale of Hopkins.
• CBS has a new Flashpoint at 10.
• There's a new Burn Notice on USA at 10.
• Food Network has a new Ace of Cakes at 10.
• Bravo has a new Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List at 10.
• Showtime has a new Penn & Teller's Bullshit at 10.
• Also at 10: Comedy Central has a new Gong Show, then a new Reality Bites Back.

Check your local TV listings for more.

A roundup of TV people from in front of the camera and behind the scenes who have passed away.

• Earle Hagen: He was a legendary, Emmy-winning composer of music for TV shows, including the themes to The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Andy Griffith Show, I Spy, That Girl, Gomer Pyle, USMC, Make Room For Daddy, The Mod Squad, and Mike Hammer ("Harlem Nocturne"). He also worked on the music for many movies, including Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Monkey Business, Daddy Long Legs, Carousel, Let's Make Love, Compulsion, Don't Bother To Knock, and There's No Business Like Show Business. Hagen died at age 88 in Rancho Mirage, CA.

• At 8, ABC has Vacation Swap, followed by a new episode of The Bachelorette.
• NBC has a new American Gladiators at 8, then a new Dateline.
• ABC Family has a new Greek at 8, then a new Wildfire.
• Also at 8: TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon.
• At 8:30, ESPN has the NBA Playoffs.
• At 9, Larry King Live has all the finalists from American Idol.
• USA has a new Monday Night RAW at 9.
• A&E has the premiere of The Andromeda Strain at 9.
• At 10, Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives.
• E! has the premiere of Denise Richards: It's Complicated, then the premiere of Living Lohan.
• Also at 10: MTV has two new episodes of The Paper.

Check your local TV listings for more.

A roundup of TV people from in front of the camera and behind the scenes who have passed away.

• Gloria Cromwell: She appeared in a number of TV shows over the years, including Kate & Allie (she played Janet, their landlord), Ryan's Hope, Murder, She Wrote, Moonlighting, Hill Street Blues, The Golden Girls, Hunter, Cop Rock, Designing Women, Coach, L.A. Law, and many others. She was also in many films, including Say Anything, The Odd Couple: Together Again, The War of the Roses, and The Parent Trap II. She died on March 3 (age unknown).

Did you get money for Christmas? I don't get money for Christmas anymore. Gift cards have become the money substitute now, for both adults and kids. But if you did get cash for Christmas, or maybe you got a Christmas bonus or maybe you got cash back for that ugly sweater Aunt Sally bought you, here's a guide to some TV show promotional items and other collectibles you might want to buy.

Heroes stamps. Yup, these are official U.S. stamps, and they come with a pic (actually, Isaac-ish drawing) of your favorite hero. Right now they have Claire, Nathan, Hiro, Peter, and also that mysterious helix symbol. What, no Syler?

• At 8, every station in the universe has the Patriots/Giants game.
• ESPN has football too at 8, the Valero Alamo Bowl.
• TV Land has a mini marathon of The Andy Griffith Show starting at 8.
• At 9, FOX has a new America's Most Wanted.
• CNBC has a new Suze Orman Show at 9.
• Lifetime has the movie My Baby Is Missing at 9.
• Also at 9: Cartoon Network has two new episodes of Naruto at 9, followed by a new One Piece.
• At 10, BBC America has a new Graham Norton Show.
• Sundance has the Hitchcock movie Rope at 10.

Check your local TV listings for more.

• TV Land has an Andy Griffith Show marathon all night.
• At 7, CBS has a new 60 Minutes, then new episodes of The Amazing Race, Cold Case, and Shark.
• ABC has two new episodes of Extreme Makeover starting at 7, then new episodes of Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters.
• NBC has a new Football Night in America at 7, followed by the Eagles/Patriots game.
• FOX has a new King of the Hill at 7.
• There's a new CW Now on The CW at 7.
• At 8, FOX has a new Simpsons.
• ABC Family has a new holiday movie at 8, Christmas Caper.
• TNT has one of their 700 showings of A Christmas Story at 8.
• AMC has Santa Claus: The Movie at 8, followed by the excellent 1984 TV version of A Christmas Carol.
• Food Network has a new Challenge at 8, then a Christmas dessert battle on a new Iron Chef America.
• At 8:30, PBS has The Best of Masterpiece Theatre.
• At 9, FOX has a new Family Guy.
• At midnight, Cartoon Network has a new Xavier: Renegade Angel, then a new Tim and Eric's Awesome Show, Great Job.

Check your local TV listings for more.

New TV DVDs, in stores tomorrow.

• The Andy Griffith Show - The Complete Series
• Charlie and Lola - Vol. 4
• The Closer - Season 2
• F Troop - Season 2
• The Kids in the Hall - Best of Vol. 2
• Rawhide - Season 2, Vol. 1
• Weeds - Season 1 (Blu-Ray)

Now here's an interesting idea: a line of food based on a TV show.

They're called Mayberry's Finest, and they are a line of "southern comfort food" based on the type of stuff The Andy Griffith Show's Aunt Bee used to cook for Andy and Opie (and anyone who was sick in town, like Clara): beef stew, mustard greens, and mixes for buttermilk biscuits and lemon icebox muffins. They're being launched at the Food Marketing Institute's convention in Chicago. Each package will be based on a character from the show and will include snippets of show scripts and episode info.

This could start a trend. How about a line of food based on Gilligan's Island (canned pineapple, coconut cream pie) or Survivor (bugs)?

You folks might recall that a man running for Sheriff in Grant County, Wisconsin changed his name from "William Harold Fenrick" to "Andrew Jackson Griffith" so he could run under the name "Andy Griffith" and hopefully use the iconic name to win the election.

He didn't win.

He did, however, have a lawsuit filed against him by Andy Griffith, the actor who played Andy Taylor on the Andy Griffith Show. Recently, however, a judge dismissed the case, saying that Fenrick did not violate any copyright and that what he did was protected under the First Amendment. I'm not a fancy big city lawyer, so I can't say much about this.

One of the saddest changes in the television landscape has been the disappearance of the theme song. They're really not that important to the people who create TV shows now (or the networks who want to get more commercials in). Lost has just a single note as their theme song, ER has changed and shortened their theme song, Jericho has static, and Heroes doesn't have a theme song or credits either.

Luckily, the shows that still have theme songs also have opening credits. Shows like The Office and Dexter all have theme songs and opening credits. They're classic TV openings. Of course, it's nothing like years gone by, where almost all shows had theme song and opening credits. The Onion has picked 22 that they feel fit their shows perfectly. I don't know if that is the same as "best opening sequences," but the choices are interesting, quirky, a little maddening, and they left out a few, as I'm sure you'll agree.