TVSquad

• At 7, ABC has a new America's Funniest Home Videos, followed by a new, two-hour Extreme Makeover.
  
• CBS has a new 60 Minutes at 7, then a new Cold Case and the movie Loving Leah.
  
• NBC has a new, two-hour Dateline at 7, followed by the premiere of the miniseries The Last Templar.
• FOX has a new Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?, then a new Simpsons.
• At 8, TBS and TNT have The Screen Actors Guild Awards.
• VH-1 has a new Confessions of a Teen Idol at 8.
• Also at 8: Hallmark has the movie Rio Bravo.
• At 8:30, Disney has a new Wizards of Waverly Place.
• At 9, PBS has a new Masterpiece Classic.
• HBO has a new Big Love at 9, then a new Flight of the Conchords.
• Showtime has a new episode of The L Word at 9, followed by new episodes of The United States of Tara and Secret Life of a Call Girl.
• There's a new Ultimate Recipe Showdown on Food Network at 9.
• ESPN has more coverage of the Winter X Games at 9.
• ESPN2 has The Australian Open at 9.
• At 9:30, FOX has a new American Dad.
• At 11:30, Cartoon Network has a new Robot Chicken.
• At 12:15am, Cartoon Network has a new Drinky Crow Show.

Check your local TV listings for more.

10:04: OK, that's it for me. I haven't even eaten yet. Don't forget to head on over to Moviefone for complete coverage of the awards (and if you missed the show, TNT is going to repeat it at 11).

See you next Friday night at Zac Efron's house.

10:01: Did Josh Brolin just make a snide reference to Julie Christie's "tiniest actor" comment when she accepted her award a few minutes ago, or was it just a joke I didn't get?

9:59: Looks like there's just movie-centric awards left. I forgot there isn't a Best TV Drama or Best TV Comedy category at the SAG Awards.

9:50: Matthew McConaghey and Kate Hudson: king and queen of the crappy romantic film.

9:46: This Farmer's Help Point ad is freaky, but I had a dream the other night that was even stranger. I won't go into details, but it involved a mutant cannibal family and a used record store. That's the last time I eat 8 Reese's Peanut Butter Cups right before bed.

9:36: Blair Underwood talking about the new technology that has come to film and television. The hidden message here is...pay the damn writers for stuff on the internet and cell phones!

9:29: These tributes to the people who died in the past year always make me nervous, because I'm afraid they'll forget someone. But this was well done, including TV character actors with the big name stars, and was even up to date as late as last week.

9:24: Female Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries is...a tie! Queen Latifah wins. Um, wait, I thought it was a tie? I'm confused.

9:20: Um...Mickey Rooney is aware that this isn't his tribute show, right?

9:18: Male Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries...Kevin Kline, As You Like It.

9:17: James Spader is slowly morphing into William Shatner.

It's good to see that the Screen Actors Guild Awards got a waiver from the WGA. Where the Golden Globe Awards were reduced to an extended press conference type event and the Academy Awards might have some alternative plan in place, the SAG Awards are actually going to have stars and a red carpet and acceptance speeches. It might turn out to be the awards show to watch this year.

I'll be live blogging the awards tonight, starting at 7:30pm EST. That means I'll get a half hour's worth of the red carpet coverage. I could have started the blogging at 5pm, when E!'s red carpet coverage starts, but then I realized that three hours of red carpet blogging would be insane. I think a half hour on the carpet and two hours of show coverage will be plenty. The show airs at 8 on TNT and TBS.

Here's a list of the nominees.

You are not a true tabloid celebrity unless all of your roads lead towards a one way ticket to rehab. Celebrities wear their Chanel sunglasses and hats low, like a badge of courage, as they are driven in their chauffeured SUV's through the Mojave Desert on their way to places with names more appropriate for a nursery school than to a place for those down the downward spiral of celebrity excess.

Common pre-requisites for rehab include an undying love for cocaine, a struggle with food or a co-dependency on the bottle.

But say you don't have a problem with any of the above and find yourself being publicly scrutinized by society who seek a social remedy for your reprehensible behavior on national television?

We make foul discriminatory language a new reason for rehab and make Isaiah Washington our example.

Unfortunately for Washington, one of the side effects of going to rehab for foul language is being the butt of many jokes, from Wanda Sykes on Ellen to even your own co-worker at The SAG Awards.

It's only a matter of time before we find Harry Potter in rehab. Let me be the first to make this prediction after his...

Actors really take themselves seriously, don't they? They don't even like to call a female performer an actress. Only actors allowed.

The SAG Awards are always a bit of a downer, since we already saw all these people at the Golden Globes. And pretty much the same people won again. The only pleasant surprises were The Office winning for Best Ensemble in a Comedy Series and Little Miss Sunshine taking the movie cast award. Here are the winners:

Female Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Helen Mirren, Elizabeth I

Male Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Jeremy Irons, Elizabeth I

Following a recent screening of the Weeds second season finale and Q&A session for SAG members, E Online's Kristin Veitch summed up the proceedings and may have even hinted at a scoop our readers had already surmised for themselves.

While the Q&A was more about the cast reminiscing and speculating about their characters and the shooting of the second season, I would be remiss not to tell you that you follow the jump at your own peril.

The more interesting revelations of the SAG screening included (WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD):

The 12th annual Screen Actors Guild Awards were held tonight. We listed the nominees in television categories earlier this month, and here are the winners:

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: Paul Newman / Empire Falls

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: S. Epatha Merkerson / Lackawanna Blues

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Drama Series: Kiefer Sutherland / 24

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Drama Series: Sandra Oh / Grey's Anatomy

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Comedy Series: Sean Hayes / Will & Grace

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Comedy Series: Felicity Huffman / Desperate Housewives

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series: Lost

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Comedy Series: Desperate Housewives

See the full list (including the winners in movie categories) at TBS.com [Thanks Seth!]