TVSquad

One of the true breakout hits of this fall season is ABC's sitcom Modern Family. The critics have been singing the praises of this show, and the ratings have been good enough that I will predict without equivocation, that Modern Family will see a second season. And Ed O'Neill deserves a lot of the credit.

I like Modern Family. I don't love, love, love it, but I like it. The guys that were together on Frasier, Steve Levitan and Christopher Lloyd, have given us something good here. It's not Frasier level yet, but it might get there with time.

If there's one part of Modern Family that has won me over completely, it's Ed O'Neill. You might think, well, sure, it's Ed O'Neill. But I have never liked Ed. I was never a fan of Married With Children. I loathed it. And don't tell me I'm a moron for saying that; it's just a show that never worked for me.

What happens if you're the former star of a hit TV show but the work isn't coming anymore? Well, there are plenty of bad options, but now you can make your own show on the web.

That's what former Married ... With Children star David Faustino has done with Star-ving, a new web show at Crackle.com. Episode 1 is up right now (and after the jump). It's not too long, and it's worth seeing. It's not the funniest thing, but kudos to everyone for going all out.

Faustino is pretty much playing a version of himself, and he's trying to get work in an industry that seems to have forgotten him. He goes to former co-star Ed O'Neil (nice of him to do a cameo here, and he's really funny) for help, and O'Neil pretty much tells him he's out of his f*****g mind. The show also co-stars former Parker Lewis Can't Lose star Corin Nemec. Episode 2 features Gilbert Gottfried, and future eps will feature Christina Applegate, Katey Segal, Ed Asner, and the cast of Growing Pains.

This is NSFW. It features swearing, references to drugs and suicide, and a disturbing scene of a German Shepherd licking Faustino's rear end.

Dancing With the Stars is a show that makes no sense to me. I understand the appeal of it; I'm usually very interested in any program that involves celebrities doing ridiculous things on national television and I know that people love bright shiny costumes, but it still somehow manages to hold no interest for me whatsoever.

With that said, I know that the announcement of each season's DWTS cast is heavily anticipated and rumored for months before the actual announcement. We heard that Dan Marino may be a contestant; a claim that was soon denied. 82-year-old Cloris Leachman was another name floated, as was Magnum, P.I. himself, Tom Selleck. Kim Kardashian and Kathy Griffin were also said to have been approached.

As with most rumors, some of these turned out to be false, but others had some truth to them. Follow me after the jump for the official (and completely insane) cast of Dancing With the Stars' seventh season, along with some twists the producers have cooked up for this go-around.

Hey, remember that show The Pick-up Artist, starring internationally recognized d-bag Mystery? Was one of your Christmas wishes to see the same kind of show, except this time on the internet, with lower production values, starring two has-been former Fox sitcom stars? Well start carving up the Christmas goose, because you just got your wish!

In a move that is sure to please lovers of both so-good-it's-bad ironic entertainment and cautionary Hollywood tales, the AV Club is reporting that noted d-bag author of The Game, Neil Strauss, has released this set of promotional videos. In them, David Faustino and Corin Nemec team up to show just how good Strauss's method for picking up chicks is by challenging each other to a "who can get the most telephone numbers" contest. A sample (NSFW) video after the jump...

It's a typical night in Moscow. You have just finished supper and are now ready to sit down with your wife, children, parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins to watch some television. On the screen a sad-faced shoe salesman is anchored to his living room couch watching his own TV. Strutting behind him is his gaudily-dressed, shockingly red-haired wife. To the side his ditsy blonde-haired daughter and fairly intelligent son, who dreams of something bigger in his life, bicker over something or other.

Sounds a bit like Married... With Children, doesn't it? Well, truth be told, it actually is. The name of the show is Schastlivy Vmeste (translated to Happy Together) and it is an authorized copy of the former FOX sitcom featuring Russian cast members and dialog. It is also a huge hit in Russia, especially among younger viewers. According to a spokesperson for Russian channel TNT, Vmeste is the most popular scripted series among the 18 to 30 crowd.

I will never forget being in high school and hearing the news that a new network would soon be premiering. It was only going to be on a couple nights a week, but instead of airing reruns and crappy local shows, it would air all new programs; it was unprecedented.

That network was called FOX, and while many of the programs were of no interest to me, I was really impressed at how they followed through with their promises. Specifically, cutting edge programming and big budgets. I watched Al & Peg Bundy say things that my parents didn't want me to hear. I watched George C. Scott in the only sitcom he ever starred in. Most importantly, I was witness to the phenomenon that became The Simpsons.

Sometimes the wheels of TV production turn mighty slowly. In August of '05 Adam posted about Doug Liman signing a deal with NBC. Then, last January there was talk about his first project being a series adaptation of the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith.

A year later, and the show is finally getting the go ahead for a pilot, but not at NBC. Somehow the show has now ended up at ABC. Liman, who directed the big screen version, will direct the pilot. It will be written by Simon Kinberg, who wrote the movie. Kinberg says of the series, ""It's essentially Married With Children with guns." Casting is under way with nobody officially attached to replace Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at this time.

I'll be curious to get a look at it, just because it's Doug Liman, but my real hope for the show is that it will somehow lead to a DVD set of the completely unrelated CBS show, also called Mr. & Mrs. Smith. You might remember that from the fall of '96, starring Scott Bakula and Maria Bello.

Interesting article up at Ars Technica regarding the FCC's curious habit of not publishing what its indecency rules are. Fox is challenging its fines saying that it's unfair that they should be penalized for not following unpublished rules. The FCC's stance is that if they published a rulebook regarding what you could and couldn't say on broadcast TV, they'd be censoring people. By leaving it unpublished and only reacting when there's a complaint, they're encouraging self-censorship and I guess can sleep easy at night knowing that the first amendment is kinda, sorta still in place.