TVSquad

(S07E08) "Some guy told me to go 'f*ck my face' once. He went to jail." - Officer Krupke

With the Seinfeld reunion coming up quickly (next week's episode is "The Table Read") things kicked into high gear last night on Curb -- especially when it came to the role of Amanda, George Costanza's ex-wife.

It came down to Cheryl and a busy, very popular actress named Virgina Sloane (played by Elisabeth Shue). Right off the bat, that creates a huge conflict since Larry assured Cheryl that she had the role. But beyond that, there were a lot of issues with how "Officer Krupke" played out in terms of conflict. Curb works best when the laughs are organic and too much of this episode felt forced and manufactured.

You read that right. John Schneider is returning to The CW. Bo Duke a.k.a. Pa Kent is back. Sadly, he won't be on Smallville.

Instead. Mr. Schneider will be playing a character on 90210, the stepfather of bad boy Liam. It's a recurring role, so fans will get to see him more than once.

This is disappointing to me. It would have been a good final season gesture to have Schneider make an appearance on the show where he played Clark's dad for five years. On the other hand, this could be some sort of negotiating backdoor tactic to do just that.

Smallville is moving to Friday nights. The CW has put it in the network equivalent of a hospice. It would be nice if The CW even acknowledged that this was Smallville's last year. I guess the network doesn't want to cut off the dead cow's milk supply quite yet.

So, for all you 90210 fans, congratulations. For all you Smallville fans, sorry to disappoint.

(S05E22) "Can I call you Mommy now?" - Wilbur

Well it took about a year and a half (thank you WGA strike), but Nip/Tuck's twenty-two episode fifth season has finally come to a close. As a finale, this episode delivered exactly what I was looking for: a few unanswered questions to leave us hanging as well as a few answers we've been waiting to have addressed since the first half of the season. Even better? There wasn't another one of those weird lip-syncing montages. One of those was enough.

John Schneider could be back on our television screens soon, if someone will buy the show. The odd part about this one isn't the content, but rather the production. Schneider is starring in twentysixmiles -- a reference to Catalina Island, where the show is being shot -- which is an independently funded production. Executive producer Rob Miller is spending some $5.5 million to shoot six episodes of the show that can serve as a launch to the series, or a trio of movies.

And he's doing the whole thing with no deal in place for broadcast. Ballsy. Despite the lack of a studio deal, they have managed to land some pretty big names to join Schneider. George Segal (Just Shoot Me), Jeffrey Tambor (Arrested Development), and James Denton (Desperate Housewives) are all set to make cameos while Jessica Tuck (Judging Amy), Eric Lange, and Daniel Quinn will be part of the regular cast. Schneider's character is a high powered executive who moves to Catalina Island after his wife divorces him in order to be closer to his children.

In this business we call show, there are those people who never let us forget that they are involved to make money. Luckily, those people often occupy the off camera part of the business and let the performers worry about making art. Meanwhile, the business types sit back and try to think up ways they can make more money off of the performers. One of the most insidious ways is to appeal to the star's ego and convince them to make a recording. What follows are some of the best -- and by "best," I mean "WTF?"

Phyllis Diller
"You're Different"
Most people today recognize he name Phyllis Diller but have no idea why she was famous, however if they watch this clip, they can be sure that it isn't for singing.

Adam mentioned last week that the person who put it the $10 million winning bid for the General Lee car on eBay didn't pay up. In fact, it now looks like that someone's eBay account was hacked and he wasn't even the one doing the bidding, it was someone else.

But now the car is for sale again on eBay, only this time you have to go through a strict qualification process before you can even bid on the car. No more phonies.

I don't really get this whole story. The car being auctioned, owned by former star John Schneider, wasn't even used on the show! Which is interesting, because they used over 300 different General Lees on the show. It's just an extra one. Sure, it's signed by the cast, but is that really worth $10 million (or even $5 million or $1 million)?

Remember when the General Lee (or one of many versions) went up for auction on eBay recently and someone finally won the auction with a bid of $9,900,500?

Well, the person who made that bid, one William Fisher, has disappeared, along with the alleged $9,900,500 he was supposedly going to pay for the 1969 Dodge Charger owned by actor John Schneider (Bo Duke). The car itself was never used on the original series, but it did appear in the TV movie Dukes Go to Hollywood.

John Schneider appears to still be a fan of his old claim to fame, The Dukes of Hazzard, on which he played Bo Duke. He has his own "Hazzard County Store" on eBay and has put up the mother of all Dukes memorabilia for auction: It's the General Lee. The real one... well, one of the real ones. There are quite a few out there.

Schneider's ad explains that the 1969 Dodge Charger appeared in the Dukes movie, not the television show. He has had it for the last ten years. Photos on the advertisement show Schneider brought it to a lot of charity events, but he also has apparently driven it in races! It also has autographs of all the living cast members of The Dukes of Hazzard. And he says that it recently won a race against the Starsky & Hutch car and the Batmobile.

The current bid for the car is $2 million, which is a hell of a lot, but at least you get to drive it!

[Via Pop Candy]