TVSquad

I watched The Celebrity Apprentice last night. Did you? While I thought the last non-celeb season of The Apprentice was a dismal grasping-at-straws season and the show should be put out of its misery, I once again got hooked during the first celebrity season.

I have my reasons I must watch. Yes, I wondered if Joan Rivers' face can actually show any signs of movement after all of her plastic surgery (it doesn't). Her mouth smiles, but that's about it. Nonetheless, Joan can be so outrageous and spontaneous that she'll crack me up anyway (and my face actually can move with expressions). Having her, Dennis Rodman, Andrew Dice Clay, Clint Black, and some of the others is enough to get me hooked on the show even before the season started. Oh, that doesn't mean I like them all. But I do like my just desserts and Clay got his cupcakes last night.

Yesterday, NBC revealed the cast for the second edition of Celebrity Apprentice, an announcement that had been made in October but somehow kept under wraps by the press until now. How did that happen? Well, my guess is that the press got a look at the names of the "celebrities" on the list and determined that they weren't leak-worthy.

I mean, really ... Dennis Rodman? Dice Clay? Tom Green? Joan and Melissa Rivers? A Kardashian sister that isn't Kim? No wonder why the only people who leaked the news were Letterman and Conan; they cast is barely even worthy of late-night monologue scorn.

After weeks of tasks, bickering between Piers and Omarosa, "You're fired!" and money raised for charity, Donald Trump finally said the words "You're hired!" (figuratively) to one of the two final contestants: America's Got Talent judge Piers Morgan and country singer Trace Adkins. Since I know some of you haven't watched the finale yet, I'll name who was crowned winner of the first edition of NBC's The Celebrity Apprentice after the jump. I can confirm though that it's a man!

I didn't think he could do it, but the Donald did it. I've been a fan of The Apprentice since its first season, but I threw in the towel with last season's lackluster gimmicky Los Angeles version of this unreality show.

But I started watching again this season as the celebrity (although far from A List celebs) started playing the game donating winnings to their favorite charities. Although my favorite Gene Simmons (of KISS fame) committed Apprenticide before my very eyes, only Lost will keep me from watching it as it airs.

Apparently Donald Trump's daughter is just as much of a tool as her father. She's weighing in on the Rosie V. The Donald feud that her father has dragged out way too far in the media. 25-year old Ivanka appeared on Today this morning, where she told Meredith Vieira that Rosie O'Donnell "instigated" the feud and that she had been "bullying people for a long time". She also defended the mean things her father said about Rosie-- calling her "fat" and a "failure" (which is funny coming from a Trump).

If you don't remember or you're one of the lucky ones who could erase this stupid feud from your brain... I'm going to remind you of it. Ivanka is right that Rosie started it. She's the one who said, on The View, that Donald Trump was morally bankrupt. Of course, Trump Sr. took it upon himself to lash out to every media outlet that would listen because he's got a new season of The Apprentice coming up soon on NBC. Ivanka jumped on her father's loud-mouthed bandwagon today as she, too, promoted The Apprentice (maybe we should all boycott it).

Donald Trump just entered the Joe Simpson Club of Creepy Dads, for telling the gals on The View that, if Ivanka wasn't his daughter, he'd probably be dating her. Ew? I know he's desperate to get better ratings for 24-year-old Ivanka's five-episode arc on The Apprentice, but... ew! I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. He also said she has a nice body and would look good if she wanted to pose in Playboy magazine. Ick. Ick. Ick. I guess that Martha Stewart feud didn't create enough headlines so he's working another angle.

While that's super gross, Joe Simpson remains the ultimate creepy dad for talking about the size of daughter Jessica Simpson's breasts.