TVSquad

There's such a thing as beating a dead horse and then there's beating a dead horse, chopping it up into tiny bits, and flinging it around like a monkey flings poo. The fact that we're still reading news items about Deadwood nearly two years after it aired its final episode just goes to show you how much it's missed. Well get this - as if we didn't already know - those two final "wrap-up the series with a neat little bow" movies are as dead as Wild Bill Hickok.

First it was Deadwood, then it was John From Cincinnati. Now, it seems, David Milch has decided to get back to his cop roots with Last of the Ninth.

Last of the Ninth is a cop drama that focuses on the rampant corruption of the NYPD in the 1970's

Deadwood fans have been treated like yo-yos for the past several months. Some days we hear that the movies are a go and some days we hear that the movies are a no.

Take this as one of the "no" days.

And it comes from a pretty good source, Ian McShane himself. He's interviewed by Ryan Stewart over at our sister blog Cinematical, where he reveals that a good friend of his called him last week and told him that the movies weren't going to happen and that the production company is tearing down the sets. He also says that even if the movies were going to be made in the next year, he wouldn't be able to do them because he's too busy with his film schedule.

OK, so the show isn't coming back, that's no reason to go out and get drunk.

Austin Nichols, who played the mysterious (was he still mysterious at the end? I stopped watching after three episodes) John on HBO's John From Cincinnati, was arrested in Jackson, MI at 2:30am for driving under the influence. According to TMZ.com, he was driving the wrong way down a one way street, was stopped by police who gave him a breathalyzer test after smelling alcohol, and brought to the police station.

The best part of this story is the mug shot. I mean, look at him. Doesn't he just look really John From Cincinnati-ish?

[via TV Tattle]

OK, it seems to be "David Milch Day" here at TV Squad, with petitions and spoofs and all that. Now comes word about the new show that Milch is doing with HBO (they certainly aren't wasting any time, eh?).

The new Milch show isn't Deadwood (sorry fans), it's a cop show, centering on a Vietnam veteran who returns to the United States and joins the New York City police force in the 1970s. This is actually a show that Milch and HBO have been working on even before Deadwood or John From Cincinnati, but now they have the time to work on it.

No word yet on whether this cop will levitate or not, but considering it's Milch and gritty 70's cops and HBO, expect a lot of swearing.

As Rich reported this morning, there's already a petition online to save HBO's John From Cincinnati from the canceled show graveyard. I doubt this is going to work, because of the reaction from viewers and the fact that David Milch probably wants to go on and do something else. But the gang at Best Week Ever has a great idea if it were to come back: change it to John From WKRP In Cincinnati!

OK, the joke doesn't go beyond changing the opening of the show, adding Loni Anderson, "Al Bundy" and (in a funny moment) Brian Austin Greene (?), but it's still a clever idea. I would have loved to have seen what this John guy could have done to those turkeys in the WKRP Thanksgiving episode.

"As God is my witness I thought turkeys could fly." That sounds like one of John's weird quotes.

I don't think anyone will be too surprised by the following news. One day after the finale of John from Cincinnati aired on HBO the pay-cable network decided to pull the plug on the quirky surfer drama co-created by David Milch.

Unlike Milch's other creation for HBO, the critical and fan favorite Deadwood, John never clicked with viewers, despite a strong cast that featured Bruce Greenwood and Rebecca De Mornay. If you doubt me take a look at some of the comments made by your fellow TV Squad readers on the show. While many of them were fascinated by the concept, and gave Milch the benefit of the doubt, they also expressed confusion and boredom about the show.

(S01E10) We got three great things in what I suspect was the last episode of John from Cincinnati ever:

1. Dylan
2. The Zip is back.
3. Wuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

Seriously though, to the three of us left watching this show, WTF?

(S01E09) Damn it. With Zippy out of the picture, I've got no one to talk to about this week's episode. Teddy? Bad Ass Teddy? Do either of you have any insight you want to share, or are you too busy getting ready for the annual Teddy Bear Picnic? If you're looking for a caterer, look no further than your own backyard. Ramon can grill up a slaughterhouse's worth of fatback in under an hour.

(S01E08) Zippy, Zippy, Zippy, can we talk? I'm hoping you can telepathically help me out here. You're the great "cruise director" after all. We've got two episodes left, and we're heading towards something big. Shaun is going to be "gone," Barry (and his buddy Teddy) are building a theater while David Milch yells mean things at them over "The Tennessee Waltz," Bill and Freddie have teamed up and John has gone all cosmic internet stalker with the help of a trance-like Cass. Help a sister out, Zip. What the hell is going on here?

(S01E07) Well-played, Linc Stark. Well-played. Linc may save his soul after all by getting out of the business before corrupting another member of the Yost family. And, finally, Luke Perry's Moon Over My Hammy. It's what the 90210 fans have been waiting for all this time and didn't even know it. (Or, maybe, they were waiting for a teen idol face-off between Luke and Saved by the Bell's Mark-Paul Gosselaar.)

(S01E06) Wow. Wow. Wow. That's it. That's the review. Wow. I think my brain blew a fuse. Last week's interminable bridge episode was totally worth it for this. The pay-off. Love it, or hate it. This is the show to be watching right now.

Remember all of that talk about a series of Deadwood two-hour movies that was mentioned after the HBO series ended in 2006? Well, it was all a figment of your imagination. In fact, television and HBO are part of your imagination as well. It's just my plan to lull you into a false sense of security while I try to take over the world! Mwha-hahahahahahahahahaha!

Ahem . . . sorry.

In all seriousness it looks like any chance of Deadwood returning to the pay-cable network in any form are pretty much, er, dead. That's according to network executive Michael Lombardo, who spoke to reporters during TCA this past week. Lombardo said that bringing Deadwood back is a doable but daunting task. First, he would need to have show creator David Milch recharge his batteries after completing the first season of John From Cincinnati. Then, Milch would need to pull the cast together again.

This article by TV critic Alan Sepinwall, where he talks about really disliking USA's Psych but loving the theme song, got me thinking: what bad TV shows have really great theme songs?

This is really hard, actually. I'm sure there are more examples of the opposite, great shows that have bad theme songs (or no theme song at all), but trying to come up with a list of bad TV shows that have great theme songs...that's pretty hard. The first one that comes to mind is John From Cincinnati, a show that has really disappointed me but has a great theme song ("Johnny Appleseed," performed by Joe Strummer) and great opening credits (old surfing footage). But other shows that I come up with - Gilligan's Island, for example - don't exactly have "great" theme songs, they're more fun in a nostalgic sort of way (and I'm not even sure I would call Gilligan's Island a "bad" show, because it goes beyond that to simple entertainment in that nostalgic way).

So what about you, readers? What TV shows can you think of that are bad but just happen to have a really cool theme song? (Edit: The Psych theme embeded after the jump)

(S01E05) What was going on in this episode? I don't know Butchie instead. Is Zippy your personal Lord and Savior? I don't know Butchie instead. Would you keep watching this show if you weren't reviewing it? I don't know Butchie instead.