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Seven greatest hand cannons in TV history

Remote Control GunThere are a lot of really horrible things that have put America on the map: Jerry Springer, our ability to infuse anything edible with cheese, the fact that we're probably working on infusing something inedible with cheese.

Guns, however, shouldn't be one of them. The Second Amendment stands as one of many great testaments to the idea of freedom that our forefathers envisioned for their people. They felt a government should trust their people with great responsibility if they truly believed in the concept of freedom and democracy.

Sure, if they came to the present and saw that we primarily use that responsibility for hunting moose from helicopters and negotiating with the Domino's guy they might take it right back, but the idea is what's important.

So to celebrate one of America's latest of many birthday to come because fireworks are technically illegal in my neck of the woods, here are your TV's seven greatest guns.

Continue reading Seven greatest hand cannons in TV history

Burn Notice: Fearless Leader

Michael_Burn_Notice_Jeffrey_Donovan(S03E04) That pesky Detective Paxson of the Miami PD continued to be a thorn in Michael's side, to the point that Michael decided it was time to extract her from his life. To get Paxson -- one royal pain in the butt who doesn't believe that Michael's one of the good guys -- Michael concocts a plan to help her close her case against Rick Matheson, a real bad guy.

Matheson was a one-note Rock look-alike, without Dwayne Johnson's charm. Mostly Matheson was a scumbag who deserved to be brought down.

Tommy, on the other hand, wasn't really a nasty moke. He was broadly hammed up by former NYPD Blue star Nick Turturro, and turned out to be Michael's way into Matheson's organization.

Continue reading Burn Notice: Fearless Leader

Burn Notice: End Run

Fiona_Michae_episodic_Burn_Notice
(S03E03)
It seems as though everyone wants to be Michael's boss. Everyone but the CIA or the NSA or some other international spy agency, including whatever organization burned him in the first place. But characters like Carla last season or the rogue Management group at the start of this season, as well as Brennen, tonight's guest handler, they're all for Michael.

Seth Peterson was back as Nate, Michael's brother with a propensity for great-rich-quick schemes and getting into trouble. This time, though, he was a pawn in Brennen's game to get Michael to do his bidding.

Continue reading Burn Notice: End Run

TV Squad Ten: Shows that deserve to have their own video game

TV shows that deserve to be video gamesThere is nothing inherently wrong with turning a TV series into a video game spinoff. It can fill in the gaps between seasons to quell the viewers' hunger, let audiences explore characters from new perspectives and even give the more hardcore couch potatoes some much needed exercise even if they only burned 1/100ths of a calorie solely through their thumbs.

The problem is video game developers pick TV shows that should never even become a travel sized board game. Developers have given the greenlight to games based on shows like American Idol, Desperate Housewives and even ... Grey's Anatomy?!? I hope that last one was a first-person shooter.

There are far better shows that offer far more entertaining elements for a kick-ass video game. These are the shows that should be next in line for a pixelated re-treatment.

Continue reading TV Squad Ten: Shows that deserve to have their own video game

Burn Notice: Question and Answer

Bruce Burn Notice(S03E02) I love Sam Axe, which is another way of saying Bruce Campbell makes watching Burn Notice a pleasure. Especially an episode like this one that was all about the chemistry between Sam and Mike when working undercover on a case with a nut job criminal intent on leaving Michael swimming in a pool of his own blood.

It's not just Sam that keeps me coming back for more from this show, or the tense but compelling subtext between Fiona and Michael's "is it love?" relationship. By and large, Burn Notice is smart TV. It shows me scenes I haven't seen before on other shows or on the big screen. More on the specifics after the jump, so if you don't want to know because you haven't watched yet, be warned.

Continue reading Burn Notice: Question and Answer

Burn Notice: Friends and Family (season premiere)

Fiona and Michael Burn Notice
(S03E01)
You knew from last season's finale that Michael taking the plunge into the Atlantic from a helicopter, thus turning down an offer to work with Management in some organized ops position, he was taking a big chance. The leap was a metaphor and the danger for Michael Westen was about to increase exponentially.

Well, in this opening episode, it's clear that creator Matt Nix has upped the volume for Burn Notice. In Spinal Tap terms, we're at eleven, and that's more than ten. For Michael, a five-mile ocean swim in suit pants was just the kind of discomfort trained operatives have to learn to endure. When he landed on Miami Beach, one of the busy, bikini-clad girls and kids making sand castle types, he was all in. But no rest for the weary. In short order, Michael was on the run and in a world of trouble.

Continue reading Burn Notice: Friends and Family (season premiere)

Burn Notice staying in Miami

Michael Westen Burn NoticeYou see that palm tree beside Michael Westen? The blue waters of the Atlantic Ocean in the background? Well, you can count on seeing all that Miami Beach ambiance on Burn Notice from now on. You might think, "Wait a minute. Why would they even consider leaving South Florida?" Well, last week the Miami commissioners threatened to demolish the Burn Notice studios.

Burn Notice is the only Miami set TV show that actually is filmed in Miami. CSI: Miami and Dexter, for example, fake it with Los Angeles locations. When you see South Beach on Burn Notice, you're seeing the real thing, same with Coral Gables, Boca Raton and every other recognizable SoFla locale. So it's become an important element in the show.

Continue reading Burn Notice staying in Miami

Chuck: Chuck Versus the Colonel

Chuck in tie(S02E21) If you were waiting all season long for an episode this power-packed, you finally got your heart's desire. You wanted action; you got it. Story line development? Check. More about Sarah and Chuck? Casey in the middle of everything? Guest stars? References to pop culture and old movies? Morgan's deepest dreams revealed? Yep. This was the episode for you. The penultimate Chuck for season two -- and hopefully not the next to last of all time -- was perhaps the best episode of the year.

For sheer dynamics, the team was not working together. Casey, who was promoted and thus became the colonel of the title, was put in the tough position of having to apprehend Chuck and Sarah. Since they all know each other so well, there was no advantage on either side, and Chuck's emotional appeal about finding his father seemed to have little effect on Casey.


Continue reading Chuck: Chuck Versus the Colonel

Burn Notice finale made quite a splash - VIDEO

burn

When I say that the Burn Notice finale last night made quite a splash, I'm not talking about the ratings. I'm talking about the show. Creator Matt Nix, who penned the Burn Notice Season Two finale, really knows how to write a cliffhanger. Actually, it's a cliffhanger with a hook, because in some ways we actually went over the cliff with Michael Westen. More on those specifics -- and spoilers if you haven't seen the show yet -- after the jump.

Continue reading Burn Notice finale made quite a splash - VIDEO

Six spinoffs you'll probably never see ... but sure would be fun

Simon Baker and Patrick Jane in The Mentalist

The new fall pilots don't excite me very much, what with all of the cops, doctors and lawyers. But I know networks, and original ideas aren't exactly the "in" thing.

So, why can't we design some spin-offs? You know, the networks might go for some ideas based on hit shows, and we can make them a little bit unique, right? Let's add in some elements that excite us to some familiar characters and see if we can't create some new spin-off pilots better than the actual ones.

Continue reading Six spinoffs you'll probably never see ... but sure would be fun

Burn Notice: Seek and Destroy

Burn Michael(S02E12) "That's the thing about spies. You never know who they are." -- Michael

Michael Westen with money troubles? Boy, now you really know how bad the economy is when a burned super spy has to dig up a job to keep himself in Armani suits. Actually, I thought it was a refreshing change of pace that Michael actively pursued an assignment rather than just wait for somebody to come along -- to Sam or Madeline or Fiona -- who needs help that seemingly only Michael can provide.

What was weird is that for much of the episode, the case was much less important than the subtext between Fiona and Michael. This is an interesting development and so different from other classic TV pairings. Watching Fiona and Michael you don't wonder if they'll ever do it, because they've done it. No, you wonder what the heck does it mean and how do they deal with the emotions stirred up by Fiona's near death and Michael's reaction to possibly losing her?

Continue reading Burn Notice: Seek and Destroy

Shawn's dad in Psych vs. Michael's mom in Burn Notice

Sharon Gless as Madeline Westen in Burn NoticeTwo of my favorite summer shows, Psych and Burn Notice, have something in common. Well, two things. First of all, they are finally back for the second half of their current seasons on the USA Network. The other is that the main characters have an obnoxious parent.

Shawn's dad in Psych, Henry Spencer (played with personality and perfection by Corbin Bersen), is tough on Shawn, yet has a tender side. Michael's mom in Burn Notice, Madeline Westen (played with obnoxious delight by Sharon Gless), is rough around the edges but loves her son like crazy.

They are fun to watch, sometimes a little bit annoying, but always entertaining. So who comes out on top as leading obnoxious parent? Who's the biggest embarrassment to their child? Read on ...

Continue reading Shawn's dad in Psych vs. Michael's mom in Burn Notice

Burn Notice: Do No Harm (winter premiere)

burn(S02E10) "Brushes with death are like snowflakes. Each one is unique and icy cold." -- Michael

Well, if you think Michael was ticked off about being burned, you should take his temperature after there's an attempt on his life. This episode, which picked up right after a bomb went off in Michael's loft doorway, had a little bit of everything that makes Burn Notice one of the best shows on TV. In short, it was great to have it back on the schedule. And yes, there was little doubt that Michael would survive the blast. It's good to see the Charger and the loft did, too.

Michael has a lot of reasons to be bent out of shape. Carla's still yanking him around and now she's involved his family by having Nate arrested. In one of the few times I can remember on the show, he really lost his cool when he screamed at her, "I want my brother out of jail. I want my life back!" Carla got the message.

Continue reading Burn Notice: Do No Harm (winter premiere)

TV Squad Ten: Most outrageous characters on TV

Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson on How I Met Your Mother

Random House defines outrageous as highly unusual or unconventional; extravagant; remarkable. It's as though they've been watching TV, and wrote their definition to fit some of the crazy characters on television shows today.

Oh, don't get me wrong; I'm not complaining. I love these larger-than-life characters, played to perfection by the talented actors who grace these roles. Some fit in perfectly with their surroundings, others stand out like a sore thumb amongst castmates. One thing they all have in common, though, is that watching them is pure entertainment.

Patrick Jane (played by Simon Baker on The Mentalist)

Jane doesn't quite have the social graces to blend into society, and that's why I love him. The frumpy suits, the obnoxious antics, and the constant pushing of the envelope make for some good TV. From card counting in the casino to reading Lisbon's mind; hypnotizing suspects to making a sandwich in a victim's home, Jane's done it all. Unconventional, to say the least.

Continue reading TV Squad Ten: Most outrageous characters on TV

USA says yes to Royal Pains

Mark FSing with me: here's a story about a doctor who is busy caring for rich folks in New York... Okay, it doesn't have the bouncy tune of a Sherwood Schwartz theme song, but this new USA show sounds like fun.

USA has picked up Royal Pains, a new summer series starring Mark Feuerstein as Hank Lawson, M.D., a doctor who is on-call to some of the most demanding patients around, the richie-riches who live in the fashionable Hamptons of Long Island.

There are a few reasons to be psyched about this new drama. For starters, it's coming from the same network that brings us Psych, not to mention Burn Notice, Starter Wife and In Plain Sight. In other words, USA has been doing very well in developing idiosyncratic, interesting comedy-drama series. There's no reason to think that Royal Pains will be a dud.

Continue reading USA says yes to Royal Pains

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