TVSquad

Dennis Haysbert recently claimed that his role as President Palmer on 24 may have helped pave the way for a viable African American presidential candidate. He went on to claim that his portrayal of Nelson Mandela in the movie Goodbye Bafana ended apartheid and that his role as Jonas Blane in The Unit cured polio. Haysbert was then wrestled to the ground by his handlers and is now "recuperating" at the Clay Aiken Home for Delusional Celebrities.

My first thought upon hearing this news was that Dennis Haysbert is obviously insane. Since I've been criticized in this space for not having an open mind about insane things, I decided to take Mr. Haysbert at his word. I then went even further and went to work putting together a list of other politicians who exist mainly due to the hard work done for them by TV actors. After researching Wikipedia for almost a full fifteen minutes, this is the list I've managed to put together...

(S04E17) I don't want to seem like I'm not happy for Jerry but did we really need to know so much about him losing his virginity and by "so much" I mean anything at all? More importantly, I have to call BS on Jerry's glowing review of his opening night performance. In my many years of "intimacy," some experiences have certainly been better than others but none of them have ever made me nostalgic for my first time. Not that I don't remember it fondly, it's just not something I would brag about and I really doubt that anyone involved would describe me as caring, respectful or wonderful.

I must admit, Mr. Kelley had me at "THE United States Supreme Court." This was a real test for Alan. On one hand, how does he justify defending a man convicted of raping a child? On the other hand, how will his huge ego be able to pass up the opportunity to argue in front of the highest court in the country?

Slate magazine is running an article regarding how weak most of what passes as political satire on television is. They quote heavily from Russell L. Peterson's new book Strange Bedfellows: How Late Night Comedy Turns Democracy into a Joke and also take some time to body-slam CNN's new comedy show, Not Just Another Cable News Show (Wait. What? CNN has a new comedy show on it? I thought that was the thing Wolf Blitzer hosted every day. Are you telling me that's not a comedy?)

Peterson's book, at first blush, seems to be another overly-alarmist, semi-academic attack on pop-culture -- Darrell Hammond is destroying democracy? Really? -- that I usually just ignore. Well, maybe it's the Tylenol PM I took to ease the pain of being in Utica tonight, but after reading Slate's discussion of it, I started to come around to Peterson's way of thinking...

As the race between Senator Hillary Clinton and Senator Barak Obama heats up for the Democratic party presidential candidacy, here comes news that should throw the spotlight onto Hillary...if she's savvy enough to say yes. During a recent visit to The Tyra Banks Show, Hillary revealed that "if (paired) with one of those really good partners" she would someday like to compete on Dancing with the Stars. When the powers that be at Dancing heard that, they wasted no time in sending the former first lady a formal invitation. While they acknowledge that the show is not currently in production, dancers from the show are performing around the country in Dancing with the Stars - The Tour. They invited Hillary to choose any one of the dancers and take a try at a cha cha, pasa doble or tango. Or, if she prefer, she could always call on hubby Bill for a pas de deux.

"Indecision 2008": The first news to note was Barack Obama's landslide victory in South Carolina. Of course, the win did not go unnoticed by the haters, specifically Bill Clinton. I was surprised that strange little pocket Clinton thing actually worked, too! Yay for successful gags. As for the Obama lovers, Ted Kennedy has publicly joined the fan club. I would like to direct Jon to check out this Clone High clip to improve his every-Kennedy accent.

In other news, Mitt Romney makes my brain hurt. Why? Well, many reasons, but most recently, he, umm--Okay, I'll leave you with: "Who let the dogs out?". Black potential voters. MLK Day. Don't believe me? Take a look.

Jon kicked off the episode by running a few rounds of paper football. Not that I'm a big paper sports enthusiast, but I couldn't help but notice that he wasn't holding the football quite right. Jon, your story just doesn't add up. He then flubbed a gag with a toy robot, which was pretty precious, even though it didn't make much sense. What can I say? I like satirists and robots.

"Indecision 2008": The Democrats took on Nevada and the media took on the world's most cliche Las Vegas metaphors to cover Hillary Clinton's win. However, Jon had them all beat with his "bet on black" comment. Of course, Hillary's win was met with criticism and Bill Clinton defended her like he's already the First Laddie. And then that drew even more criticism. So it goes.

"Mess O' Potomac": If there was ever any doubt that Bush has no mental checkpoint to filter his unscripted words, Bush's recent comment, "I heard somebody say, 'Where's Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead because Saddam Hussein killed all the Mandelas," pretty much sealed the deal. Oh, that deal is so very, very sealed. Also, I'm not sure how well the Congress/Lionel Hutz comparison works, but I like it whenever someone finds an excuse to use a Simpsons clip.

Several weeks ago, Senator Hillary Clinton asked the public to help her come up with a theme song for her presidential campaign. And then The Sopranos ended its historic run. And it was too much of a good opportunity to pass up.

So Hillary and hubby Bill made a video for her web site discussing what song the Senator had selected. Only the video is a parody of the Sopranos' last scene in the diner, with Hillary as Carmela, Bill as Tony, Chelsea as the parallel parking Meadow, a bowl of carrot sticks substituting for onion rings (Bill's got heart problems) and an abrupt cut-to-black.

See the video after the jump. (And if you have a burning desire to find out what campaign song Clinton chose, you can go here.)

[Via Gawker.]

As we've mentioned before, Larry King is celebrating 50 years in the news business, and all next week CNN is going to mark the occasion with a week of special Larry King Live shows. Here's the lineup:

• Monday, April 16: Oprah Winfrey
• Tuesday, April 17: Katie Couric
• Wednesday, April 18: 50 Years of Pop Culture - a look at everything that Larry has covered over the five decades, with hosts Anderson Cooper and Ryan Seacrest
• Thursday, April 19: Former President Bill Clinton
• Friday, April 20: A special hour hosted by Bill Maher

While critics may heap criticism on the torture-heavy Fox thriller 24, a former commander in chief -- and spouse of a current Democratic presidential candidate -- is a fan of watching Jack Bauer hunt down terrorists.

Former President Bill Clinton said even though 24 is run by "an uber right-wing guy" (referring to producer Joel Surnow), he thinks the show is fair in making both Democrats and Republicans look equally evil, according to a Reuters article.

Of other contemporary programs, Clinton said he's fond of Boston Legal and that his McFavorite is Grey's Anatomy. (Wonder where he stands on the Callie-Izzie contretemps?)

The Hollywood Reporter also said Clinton likes watching TV Land -- I Love Lucy, All in the Family and Bonanza -- because his wife, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton, is frequently away campaigning and it gives "me something to do at night."

(S05E13) Ya know, no matter what part political affiliation you claim, I think we can all agree that Bill Clinton lends himself well to comedy. There's just enough hillbilly in his character to make him easy to laugh at. Family Guy certainly isn't the first show to take a run at Clinton, and they've now featured the former president four or five times, but there's plenty of room at that party.

That's getting ahead of the game though. Before we could get to the Peter and Bill hijinks, there was the loosely relevant opening at the Quahog Marine Center. While it was a long way to go to get to the main plot, there were a lot of funny bits in that opening. Herbert at the fondle tank, Stewie's stripper line, and Seamus saving Peter from the octopus were all good bits. I especially liked the Wacky Wall Walker finish to that.

Barney Fife, Herman Munster, James T. Kirk...and President Bill Clinton?

Yup, the former President is going to be the keynote speaker at TV Land's March 23 event to announce their lineup and programming future. It's the ultimate Baby Boomer talking about the ultimate Baby Boomer network. To quote TV Land spokesman Paul Ward, about the speech: "You better believe it's going to be about the economic and cultural and social influence of Baby Boomers (I don't know why I keep capitalizing "Baby Boomers" but it just looks right).

The event is being held to announce new shows that TV Land is going to air this year. It will be held at Jazz at Lincoln Center in Manhattan.

[via TV Tattle]

Many people, including Rosie, have accused American Idol celebrity judge Paula Abdul of sipping more than Diet Coke from the big old red cup that sits on the desk in front of her. Their proof: slurring speech, ditzy behavior, and often erratic body movements.

But it's all hogwash, according to Paula who told Us Weekly, "I've never been drunk. I have never done recreational drugs. Just look at my 20-year career. Tell me someone who is into partying or doing drugs that could have done that."

There, she's said it. Of course, celebrities say lots of things, and deny tons more.

Fox Newschannel has gotten its hands on some footage from the ABC fictional mini-series, The Path to 9/11, and is planning to air it tonight. The mini-series, you may remember, aired back in September and had members of the Clinton administration pretty ticked off because the script essentially blamed them for 9/11 because they failed to capture or kill Osama bin Laden. Edits were made before it reached air.

But now Sean Hannity will air some of the original content on his program tonight at 9 pm. Fox got the footage by recording video of an unedited scene that producer Cyrus Nowrasteh played during a speech at California State University earlier this month. Fox will air the scene and interview Nowrasteh, with the reasoning that the American public deserves to see what the Clinton administration was opposed to.

If it were the other way around and the Bush administration had pressured ABC to change its script, do you think Hannity would still air it?

What happens when you mix Bill Clinton, a morning issues show produced by the conservative FOX News Channel, and a question that he didn't do enough to capture Osama bin Laden? You get the tirade below, which aired yesterday morning on FOX News Sunday. When host Chris Wallace questions the former president on how his administration failed to get bin Laden, Clinton got increasingly upset, to the point where he was almost yelling at Wallace. I could go over what he said, but you're better off watching the ten-minute video and you can decide for yourself whether he is right or not. Embedded video is after the jump; it's been one of YouTube's most-watched videos to date.

By the way, here is Wallace's reaction, care of FishbowlDC.

[video via FishbowlNY]