TVSquad

Are you weeping, children of the late-80s and early-90s? As you may have heard, Nickelodeon is getting a new logo. Understandably, they're going for something that can be incorporated into their infinite number of other properties, but the removal of that classic splatter is certainly the end of an era. Take a look at some of the new ways they'll be using the updated logo.

The late eighties and early-to-mid nineties brought out some of the filthiest, bottom-feeding talk shows our country has ever seen. From Morton Downey Jr. and Sally Jesse Raphael to Jerry Springer and Maury Povich, it was the era when "trash TV" became a symbol of a country's swift spiral down one giant cultural toilet in opposition to people like Larry King and Oprah Winfrey, who effortlessly made interviews with, like, Fran Drescher come off looking like Masterpiece Theater.

Around the latter half of the "boom" came Ricki Lake, the formerly obese star of Hairspray (no, seriously, that was basically her résumé), with a show that combined the usual elements of trashy talk (read: "freaks") with something impossibly dumber yet: catchphrases. Unlike today, when it takes weeks to months for squawk-boxes to latch onto cultural buzzwords like "metrosexual" and "baby daddy," Ricki Lake was trotting out episode "subjects" like "You're not all that!" and "Dump that zero and get yourself a hero!"

Naturally, she was a smash.

Should Blossom be considered classic sitcom? Mmmprobably not. But to many a 20-something, the NBC sitcom was an unlikely success that, through a blend of irreverence and quirkiness, lasted five seasons and proved culturally resonant in its approach to covering "realistic topics" relevant to teenagers of the nineties.

Right about this time of year, most of the true children of the nineties are graduating from four years of Hell and preparing for a lifetime of also Hell, this time sans meal plan and floor meetings. Take a break from job-hunting and crying about student loans, children, and join me in wading in this pool of nostalgia, for your dreams have finally come true. Yes, yes. It looks like Nickelodeon's totally awesome sports challenge show, GUTS, is coming back.

Anyone who had a collection of action figures growing up knows you can't have an action figure without the proper weapon. Chewbacca had his crossbow, Cobra Commander had his laser pistol, and the Battlestar Galactica action figures had all kinds of cool weapons. But what about MacGyver? What's the accessory of choice for his mass-produced toy lookalike? The answer, you'll find, is quite obvious. Sure, it may just look like a paper clip, but it's a MacGyver paper clip, which means you can use it for anything. You can open doors, blow up tanks, impregnate spider monkeys, improve your bowling score, go back in time, drill for oil, slice pineapple, raise the dead and many other things. That's power at your fingertips, boys and girls.

Oh yeah, and if you haven't figured it out, the "toy" isn't real.

[via Digg]