TVSquad

My wife was watching a Lifetime movie that I've already forgotten the title of the other day. What I can't forget, however, is that during every single commercial break of this two-hour movie there were at least two different commercials for various feminine hygiene products. I understand that the Lifetime demographic is the right audience for these ads but at the same time don't you think there's a limit to how often a woman wants to think about her most intimate area's cleanliness while watching a movie?

The women I know actually have quite a wide variety of interests beyond yeast infections and Vagisil. In fact, those things almost never come up in conversation. I don't even think Lifetime should stop airing the commercials, because I'm told it's important stuff, but let's throw some variety in there, too. If Spike TV was airing condom commercials twice a break in the middle of the day I'd think they were obsessing a little bit too. You care. That's sweet. We get it, now how about reminding me of what really matters. McDonald's has "Hugo" size drinks for a dollar!

Salt-N-Pepa and TLC. Two of the most significant and important female R&B groups of the past 25 years. Why couldn't it have just stayed that way? No, VH1 just had to drag members from both groups into their sick "looking for love" reality world. That's right, Pepa and Chilli are looking for love, on VH1 with a camera crew and eight half-hour episodes. Somehow I have a hard time imagining either of these women having a hard time picking up guys.

Can I just say to all the other celebrities out there who are looking at this as a good thing, just stop right there. Do you think people are respecting Bret Michaels for his music these days? He's more famous for whacking his head on a stage. If the music dries up down the road, I don't want to see Beyoncé and Justin Timberlake hawking themselves all over VH1 to try and find love. Not to mention: have they seen the kind of people these reality shows find for you to fall in love with?

Don't look for it this week. As Nigel says, these things take time. At least they should take time. I'm glad So You Think You Can Dance is trying to put together a Michael Jackson tribute special. I'm even more glad that executive producer Nigel Lythgoe is trying to take the time to do this right. While everyone seems to be trying to throw something together right away, Lythgoe says that it'll happen if and when it happens. Plus, I'd sure rather see a SYTYCD tribute than tonight's re-airing of the MJ American Idol episode.

The more cynical among us may see it as a chance to cash in on the death of the King of Pop, but considering Jackson's significance into the world of popular dance, it makes perfect sense. Lythgoe's even trying to pull in Paula Abdul to help choreograph some aspect of it. I wouldn't mind seeing some synergy between American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance, considering that Fox is setting them up to air in opposite half-seasons; Dance in the fall, and Idol after Christmas.

I know Harper's Island has been panned by everyone from television critics to deranged psychopathic killers with a penchant for islands, but I don't care. For eleven weeks now, I've followed along on this silly ride, and I've been enjoying the hell out of it. It's the horror-mystery aspect of it. Sure, I'm a little disappointed that the killer (so far) isn't one of the main cast members, but I'm having fun watching the cast get taken out "one by one," as creepy-little-girl says each week in the intro.

I was always a huge fan of Agatha Christie's Ten Little Indians/And Then There Were None. Plus, I'm a sucker for a long-form story in television. I think this is one of those things television has over the movies. You can't take thirteen hours to tell a mystery in the theaters. That's one of the reasons I'm never as impressed with the done-in-one shows. You have this format that allows for these massively detailed long stories so why not use it? I don't care if you don't think Americans have the attention span for it; I do. And aren't you supposed to be programming for me?

In the wake of his surprise death yesterday, the networks scrambled to cobble together retrospectives of Michael Jackson's life and works and get them on the air as quickly as possible. I expect we'll see more carefully planned tributes coming down the road. But none perhaps more bizarre than Fox's proposed tribute to the King of Pop, coming up this Monday, June 29 at 8 ET.

They've decided to air an encore of the Michael Jackson themed episode of American Idol from this past season. In it, the Top 13 contestants performed from Jackson's catalogue. It's a bizarre choice, because despite a few good performances, notably from Kris Allen, Alexis Grace and Allison Iraheta, most of the performances were either okay or downright terrible. I'd think you'd want some good singing of perhaps some of his better known works to honor the man.

(S05E09) Oh my god, a group number? Who knew?

Group Number - "I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho)," Pitbull
(Hip-Hop, Dmitry Chaplan and Napoleon & Tabitha) Cat got a more dramatic entrance after this busy little number. I found myself enjoying the piece as we got into the middle of it. The beginning seemed overly long with the close-ups of the dancers undulating around in the dark. It was more posturing than dancing at that point. But when we got into it there were some nice moments, though no particular breakout stars.

Which actually sums up some of the problems with this season so far. Brandon is a force to be reckoned with, and I like Ade but I think by this point last season I was already seeing a lot of fun personality from Twitch, Joshua, Katee, Chelsea, Courtney, Gev and so many more. Where are those strong dynamic and unique performers this year? We have a lot of great dancers, but a real dearth of stars.

The death of Michael Jackson is a stunning blow to the entertainment medium. You'd think upon someone's death, the media could forget all the negative stuff for at least a minute and focus on the positive of their life. But apparently not. So when I got sick to death of Fox News and everyone else going on and on about the child molestation charges and the plastic surgery and all the other weird stuff we already know Michael Jackson is infamous for, I thought I'd check in with MTV.

Surely, considering his importance in the music video format, MTV would have a response. And it would mean a break from their glut of reality crap. What a pleasant surprise to see a marathon of Michael Jackson videos. This is how I want to memorialize a music legend. No matter what he did or didn't do with his life, the music will always be his legacy. Thank you MTV (I can't believe I'm saying that) for eulogizing Michael Jackson in the only way that truly matters. With his artistic genius.