TVSquad

(S02E15) "I'm just gonna be a kick-ass single mom. Like Erin Brokovich, or Sarah Connor." - Liz

30 Rock fans looking for laughs, plot twists, and a cliffhanger in the finale are probably happy. You got all that, plus a guest star (more than one, actually) that I didn't even know was going to be in the episode. And if you're one of the people who was wondering "what the heck does the episode title 'Cooter' even mean?," well, he's the secret to that (and Tina Fey has been using the term for a while now).

But some 30 Rock fans - I would go out on a limb and say most of you - weren't happy to find out who the father of Liz's maybe-baby might be.

Here's who's on the late night shows tonight.

• Charlie Rose: Bill Moyers
• The Daily Show: David Perlmutter
• The Colbert Report: Arianna Huffington
• The Late Show with David Letterman: Paris Hilton, Steve Wyrick, and Panic at the Disco
• Jay Leno: Jenna Fischer, Robert Schimmel, and Trace Adkins
• Jimmy Kimmel Live: Ashton Kutcher, Isabella Rossellini, and Gavin DeGraw
• Tavis Smiley: Helen Hunt and Majora Carter
• Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Emile Hirsch and Craig Baldo
• The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Emily Deschanel and Melvin Lardy
• Last Call with Carson Daly: James Denton and The Heavy

• ESPN has NBA Playoffs all night.
• At 8, ABC has a new Ugly Betty, then new episodes of Grey's Anatomy and Lost.
• CBS has a new Survivor at 8, followed by new episodes of CSI and Without A Trace.
• NBC has a new My Name Is Earl at 8, then the season (series?) finale of Scrubs, a new episode of The Office, the season finale of 30 Rock, and a new ER.
• FOX has a new Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? at 8, followed by a new Don't Forget The Lyrics.
• The CW has a new Smallville at 8, then a new Supernatural.
• There's a new Overhaulin' on TLC at 8, then new episodes of American Chopper and Miami Ink.
• Also at 8: AMC has the original Planet of the Apes.
• At 8:30, Cartoon Network has a new Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends, followed by a new George of the Jungle.
• At 9, HGTV has a new Divine Design.
• At 10:30, Comedy Central has a new 'Lil Bush.

Check your local TV listings for more.

My knowledge of law and patents never got past reruns of L.A. Law, so I have no idea if this guy from New Jersey has a case or not.

The gentleman claims that he approached reps from Merv Griffin's company back in 2001 and pitched them the idea for a game show based on crossword puzzles. He says he even came up with the idea of the game's "twist" where you can take the other person's spot. He also patented the game. Now he has filed a lawsuit in Los Angeles Superior Court that says Merv's company took his idea and made the syndicated game show Merv Griffin's Crosswords (a show that I've tried and tried to get into but haven't been able to - though "Ty Treadway" is one of the great game show names of all-time though).

I remember reading an interview with Griffin where he said that he had been working on the idea for a crossword puzzle game show for years. Griffin, as you know, created Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy!

This must be Short-Lived Sitcom week. Yesterday I told you about Married People, and today it's Day By Day.

This was a short-lived show on NBC (ran for 33 episodes in 1988-89). It was about Brian and Kate Harper, a professional couple (Doug Sheehan from Knot's Landing played stockbroker Brian, and Linda Kelsey from Lou Grant played lawyer Kate) who decided to open an in-home day care center. Their teen son Ross was played by C.B. Barnes, who played Greg in the Brady Bunch movies and starred in the Starman TV series and Malcolm and Eddie.

But I'd like to talk to you about the two other females in the cast. Two that went on to much bigger things later in their careers.

I think we can totally forget about Star Jones and Barbara Walters exchanging Christmas gifts this year.

The former View host/Court TV host is quite angry at Walters for various things that Walters says in her new memoir, Audition. Among the many reveals in the book is the fact that Walters had an affair with a married Senator back in the 80s. This doesn't please Jones at all, and she's also upset at Walters' version of the events that led to Jones being axed from The View. Walters reveals that they all knew that Jones lost a lot of weight by having gastric bypass surgery and that the other hosts were ticked that they had to lie about how Jones lost the weight on the air.

I enjoyed Speed Racer when I was a kid. I haven't seen it in 25 years or so and I'd probably be horrified now by what my youthful tastes were back then, but I remember liking the race scenes and what the car could do. I remember wanting my first car to be one that would have buzzsaws come out of the front and a big lever that would come down underneath the car that would make it jump over other cars. That last feature doesn't seem like it would work to me, now that I think about it as an adult.

Anyway, the live-action version with Emile Hirsch, Christina Ricci, John Goodman, and Matthew Fox opens this Friday. And the early buzz is that it's not going to do as well as they were hoping it would.

Here's who's on the late night shows tonight.

• Charlie Rose: Paola Antonelli
• The Daily Show: Senator John McCain
• The Colbert Report: Hasan Elahi and George Johnson
• The Late Show with David Letterman: Emile Hirsch, Tom Dreesen, and Dirk Arthur
• Jay Leno: President Jimmy Carter, Jon Favreau, and P.O.D.
• Jimmy Kimmel Live: Christina Ricci, Mario Batali, and Lil Mama
• Tavis Smiley: President Jimmy Carter
• Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Liam Neeson, BJ Novak, and The Duke Spirit
• The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Felicity Huffman and Mike Doughty
• Last Call with Carson Daly: Miranda Kerr, Rachel Harris, and Seether

If you're a regular viewer of CNN's Larry King Live, you know that's not an Onion headline. Seacrest has filled in for Larry King several times over the past few years, usually on pop culture-oriented shows, and now it looks like Seacrest wants the gig permanently.

MSNBC "The Scoop" column is reporting that the American Idol host is in secret negotiations to take over for King, and the change could take place as early as the end of this year. Of course, this goes against the recent news that King had signed a contract extension through 2011, but that contract doesn't necessarily guarantee him the 9 pm slot, just that he'll stick with CNN in general.

• TNT has NBA Playoffs all night.
• At 8, ABC has a new Wife Swap, followed by a new Supernanny and a new special about Barbara Walters new memoir, Audition.
• CBS has a new Price Is Right Million Dollar Spectacular at 8, then new episodes of Criminal Minds and CSI: NY.
• NBC has a new, two hour Deal Or No Deal at 8, then a new Law and Order.
• FOX has new episodes of 'Til Death, Back to You, and American Idol.
• There's a new America's Next Top Model at 8 on The CW, followed by a new Farmer Wants A Wife.
• PBS has a new Secrets of the Dead at 8, then a new American Experience.
• Also at 8: TCM has From Here To Eternity.
• At 10, Bravo has a new Top Chef.
• MTV has a new episode of The Real World at 10.
• Spike has a new Ultimate Fighter at 10.

Check your local TV listings for more.

My roommates and I were obsessed with this show when it was on in 1990. We were all living in the same condo, all of them in college and me...not. We'd spend our time playing tennis, eating subs and Chinese, and watching Star Trek: TNG, MacGyver, reruns of Spenser: For Hire, and this show.

Married People was a short-lived sitcom on ABC. It was about the lives of several married couples who all lived in the same building in New York City. The star of the show was Jay Thomas, who was married to Bess Armstrong (they were the "middle" couple). The "older" couple (also the landlords in the building) was played by Ray Aranha and Barbara Montgomery, and the "younger" couple was played by Chris Young (from Max Headroom) and Megan Gallivan. Several episodes were directed by veteran director Asaad Kelada.

Here are the weekly cable ratings, by number of viewers.

Looks like everybody was chasing Zoey this week, and not just the paparazzi. The Nickelodeon show got the top two spots in viewers (a movie and a regular episode of the show), knocking Monday Night RAW down a bit. TNT did really well with the NBA Playoffs.

1. Chasing Zoey (Nickelodeon)
2. Zoey 101 (Nickelodeon)
3. Monday Night RAW (USA)
4. NBA Playoffs - Suns/Spurs (TNT)
5. Monday Night RAW (USA)
6. The Hills (MTV)
7. NBA Playoffs - Lakers/Nuggets (TNT)
8. NBA Playoffs - Spurs/Hornets (TNT)
9. SpongeBob SquarePants (Nickelodeon)
10. NBA Playoffs - Hawks/Celtics (TNT)

(S04E06) "I don't want to mess with someone crazier than I am." - Matt

Welcome to week 6 of Hell's Kitchen, also known as Everybody Hates Matt. This was one episode where I didn't buy Chef Ramsay's decision at all. He had to choose between three people at the end, and the one who should have gone - clearly - didn't. The one who should have gone second? That person didn't go either. I really think this week was all about "how can we guarantee more reality show tension in the weeks to come?" and not a professional decision. And that's really disappointing to me.

Here are the weekly TV ratings, by number of viewers.

Last week I mentioned that Lost had dropped a lot in the ratings. This week they're not even in the top 20.

Looking over this list, it becomes apparent what it takes to get on it. If you're FOX, keep pumping out reality shows and reality competitions shows. If you're ABC, it's dancing and doctors. And if you're CBS, the answer is clear: create another police procedural show. It doesn't matter who's in it or where it's set, just make sure it's about a team of investigators who investigate something that needs investigation.

1. American Idol - Tues (FOX)
2. American Idol - Weds (FOX)

Here's who's on the late night shows tonight.

• Charlie Rose: coverage of the North Carolina and Indiana primaries
• The Daily Show: Fareed Zakaria
• The Colbert Report: Nathan Gunn
• The Late Show with David Letterman: Ashton Kutcher, Mac King, and Steve Winwood
• Jay Leno: Christina Ricci, KT Tunstall, and Julie Scardina
• Jimmy Kimmel Live: Robert Downey Jr. and Lyfe Jennings
• Tavis Smiley: John Dean, Barry Goldwater Jr., and Famke Janssen
• Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Jason Lee and Galactic
• The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: John Goodman and Jason Aldean
• Last Call with Carson Daly: John Cho and Your Vegas