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Review: Better Off Ted - Mess of a Salesman

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better of ted mess abc
(S02E11) That's all, folks. This was the final scheduled episode of Better Off Ted, aka ABC's brightest, funniest and weirdest comedy in years. I'm really gonna miss this show, and I'm not looking forward to awaiting the network's final decision concerning its fate. Will BoT return to ABC? Could another network (say Comedy Central?) pick it up? I hope so, but I'm not holding my breath.

Tonight's episode wasn't exactly a classic, but it offered plenty of laughs, hilarious throwaway lines and a great guest turn from Warehouse 13's Eddie McClintock.

Casting McClintock as Ted's flaky brother Billy was a wonderful idea. The guy has excellent comic timing and he fit in perfectly with the rest of the cast and the crazy tone of the show. I loved how Billy brought out the primitive nut-slapping, titty-twisting version of Ted we rarely get to see. Billy's visit also prompted Phil and Lem to act reckless and order a ridiculous amount of cadavers, chomp down on "cheese apples" and wear tight leather pants.

Only Linda and Veronica were left unaffected by Billy's destructive ne'er-do-well ways. They were too busy doing their bad cop/good cop routine to raise money for a charity that inspires young girls. It was a little surprising to see Veronica caring so much for a cause that didn't benefit her directly, but I loved watching her morph into a murderous machine gun-toting fawn to get the job done. The highlight of the episode sprang up from this plotline when Linda, prompted by Sith Lord Veronica, eagerly head-butted the Veridian Foundation douche and knocked him out.

Poor Ted was forced to clean up everyone's mess in this episode, turning him into the Michael Bluth of his bizarre Veridian family. He struck out with the foundation guy, mostly because Veronica and Linda continued to humiliate him after the head-butt. Luckily Billy and the boys took care of that situation by stuffing a cadaver in the guy's trunk. (Let's hope no one ever gets a hold of those incriminating pictures of Phil and Lem setting up the scheme.)

Everything worked out in the end, but not before Ted broke down and unleashed a crazy rant on his brother, complete with pet possum references!

Like I typed before, I'm really gonna miss getting my weekly Better Off Ted fix. I'm drinking my morning coffee out of a beaker in recognition of another great season.

Quotes:

- Bang zoom! I'm getting a muffin!

- Hey, are those fresh nuts?

- I had an aunt who fought a cow for beer money once. The cow never forgave her.

- We can't leave work in the middle of the day. We're not Somali pirates.

- The forest will run red with the blood of woodland creatures who doubted little Veronica and will now pay with their furry little lives.

- Saddle up, Linda! And say goodbye to common sense.

- That's right, once a month they send us a new cadaver whether we're finished with the old one or not.

- If you tell anyone I did you a solid, I will tear off your head and tinkle in your skull!

- You sir are a bad egg!

- Boop.

- Do you know how many times I didn't get laid in college because girls don't like getting hissed at by a jealous possum?

- Deal with it!

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