TVSquad

(S03E12) Firstly, a bit of news. Both Doc Hammer and Jackson Publick, as opposed to a solo Doc, will be attending this year's Dragon*Con in Georgia, so go see them if you can. Secondly, the guys have done a video commentary for "ORB" and you can watch it on Adult Swim's website. Not as many off-topic ramblings that we know and love in this one, so if you miss irrelevance and mimed nunchuck skills, revisit the old "The Buddy System" commentary. And last but not least... This week's episode premiered on the Adult Swim Fix as usual, but this time there's actually bonus footage that was not included in the televised version. It's pretty self-contained, but definitely worth a watch. I've embedded it here, to save you that exhausting trip across teh internetz.



It's crazy to think that all of this episode was packed into just twenty-two minutes. I mentioned in an earlier review that this season has felt like a series of set-ups and we've been waiting for the big punchline. Well, beginning with "ORB" and continuing with this episode, the punchline seems to be finally taking shape. The guys certainly know how to end the season with a bang, and they're gently tying up the loose ends as they go. This episode was probably one of the best of the season. They even let HELPeR save the day for once, using his office chair bottom to land the X-1.

So, Brock didn't die, but he had to bust up his charger after it tried to kill him. This whole episode was a mess for the guy, really. But how could he be sad with so much love and robot hugs around him? Having to tell the boys that he didn't love them was like something out of a cheesy movie, but I couldn't help but feel a wee bit heartbroken for Dean and Hank. Thank goodness Hank lightened the mood by surprising Brock in the car. I was trying to figure out if Hank was so ballsy during Brock's fights because of his admiration or because of his newfound belief that he's immortal. Maybe Hank is really that dumb.

We haven't seen Molotov Cocktease all season and that super-short conversation totally didn't do her justice. At least we now know she has a posse of Black Hearts. She introduced the details of the three assassins hired to kill Brock: Herr Trigger, Go-Fish, and Le Tueur. If you haven't done so already, it's worth pausing the video on the Fix to read the assassins' details. The return to Nightingales was also great, if only to see Hunter Gathers in strip-action. Also, either Doc Venture had a severe case of Red Moco Cooler goggles or he has a stubble fetish.

If JG Ballard wrote spy adventures, his action hero would be Herr Trigger. What a hilarious creep and hilarious death. Go-Fish wasn't quite as intriguing, I thought, but still very creative in using chumming for evil. Brock's final tango with Go-Fish confused me a bit. Did he prepare a hairpiece for the shark stunt? Had he been wearing a wig this whole time? Did he just come up with that idea on the spot? I don't know how an impromptu poodle-mullet could have stayed intact without some crazy full scalp removal, from which Brock didn't seem to be suffering. I guess I'll just write it off as cartoon possibility, like the Henchmen's blinking goggles. The Batman-filled battle with La Tueur, who had a ridiculously gaudy costume for such a sophisticated fellow, was fantastic, even though Brock got his nipple cut off. Once, again, I must wonder if Hank has already started testing his immortality.

I was excited by the fabulous return of Shore Leave, but the fact that he was re-born as Holy Diver made it all the more awesome. I loved everything from his sassy head bobbing while activating the Boots of the Gospel to the final "Boom! Yummy." Thank goodness he's so scantily clad, because otherwise that armor-up would have taken forever. I actually ran through the Season Two DVD commentary because I could not, for the life of me, remember why or when Holy Diver was first mentioned. I finally found it during "Assassinanny 911", a bit after Molotov took on the Manaconda. Holy Diver was an imaginary character, described as just a guy in a diving suit emblazoned with a cross with an anchor on the bottom. Doc Hammer suggested that the worst episode ever would involve -- and only involve -- Holy Diver, Dean, HELPeR, and Otto Aquarius underwater. Now that Holy Diver has a tangible identity, I believe that imaginary episode would actually be the greatest in the entire history of television. More Soul Mates, please.

The Monarch, Dr. Mrs. The Monarch, #21, #24, and the Moppets made a surprisingly efficient team in such a poor situation. The Moppets seemed almost too obedient this time. When are they going to make their move and stab the Monarch in the back? Or at least slit the throats of #21 and #24? Not that it wouldn't be some of the most depressing character deaths ever. I'm also a little worried about how Sgt. Hatred is already inconsolable over the very idea of Princess Tinyfeet leaving him. She was the only one keeping him in line, so will he be reverting to his old ways once she leaves him? I briefly considered the possibility that she had another announcement, like a pregnancy, but then I realized that would be even worse than a break-up.

The episode ended with the Monarch's cocoon approaching helpless HELPeR holding up the empty X-1 and the LAPD kicking down the motel room door, facing vomit-faced Doc, Dean, Hank, and Brock in his Juice sweatpants. Man, the guys must have something spectacular prepared for next week. No pressure, boys.

And now, the big question: Where in the heck is Phantom Limb?

Shirt of the Week: Molotov's Black Hearts. Wow, I definitely did not see this coming, but I love it. Boys get another black t-shirt with the design, but it looks like the ladies have been treated to a white tank top version. Good call in not actually including the word "cocktease" in the design and opting for a more subtle "MC." I really had no idea what to expect this week, but for a split second, I thought about Holy Diver's cross-anchor. That'd be a tough shirt to pull off.