(S05E04) Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have witnessed the beginnings of a new low in Project Runway. I don't recall ever seeing a group of designers so completely miss the mark in a challenge. Most of the outfits weren't atrocious as straight-up garments, but in the context of the challenge, all of them were terrible in one way or another.I think my horror is fully justified, as this is the first challenge in which a freakin' skort was in the top three. A skort. The very thought of a skort makes me want to set a Limited Too alight, so imagine the severe trauma that ensued after I ever-so briefly entertained the idea of America's top athletes representing the country in front of the rest of the world... wearing freakin' skorts. I have a mess to clean up.
The challenge was to design an outfit for America's lady Olympians to wear to the Games' opening ceremonies. Thank goodness this was just an inspiration and the athletes wouldn't have to actually wear the winning creation. The guest judge was super-skater Apolo Ohno. Check out this episode's designs here.
Blayne: So, the boy is breaking down because he hasn't been able to get his tan on. Is he Birdman or something? I'm desperate for this kid to leave. I can't handle him anymore. He's making young folks look bad, just from that horrible Beatles exchange with Tim Gunn. Really, I swear not all of us under-30s are this ignorant. His asymmetrical top looked well-made but it would have been ridiculous on our muscle-y athletes. Plus, the stripes didn't even look like blue and red, but some teal and pink.
Daniel: [ALMOST AUF'D] I'm so disappointed. This cocktail dress was totally inappropriate for the challenge. Plus, it hurt my eyes.
Jennifer: [AUF'D] I guess the people that kept confusing Leanne and Jennifer can kind of rest easy now. She was kicked off for not being able to step outside of her girly tendencies. I really didn't mind her color choices in this outfit, because gold can look very "Yay, America!" if used correctly. If she had added just a wee bit of red, she probably could have gotten away with sliding under the radar.
Jerell: This wasn't the losing outfit? It didn't even make it into the bottom two? This alone was almost enough to make me lose faith in the show. Jerell really screwed up this week. There was nothing good about his creation. There was an ugly hat, an unattractive bow, poorly constructed sleeves, a weird choice of belt, and leggings under a pencil skirt. Who does that? The worst part is that he sounded super-excited about making a hat for the first time. I suggest he stick to his day job. And by "day job", I mean "any job that doesn't involve making hats." I'm really, really disappointed.
Joe: Skort. Oh, my God. Skort. I had to struggle to look past the skort to see the reasonably nice top, because... Man, I hate skorts. This was the only outfit that seemed even remotely appropriate for the Olympics. The part that breaks my heart is that it's actually a really ugly garment. The "USA" along the side is super-tacky and the skort (ugh, I'm sorry) is an incredibly awkward length. But yeah, whatever, I'll give him credit for that zipper trick. That was kind of cool.
Keith: I thought this was kind of cute. Not entirely appropriate, but cute.
Kelli: Mad Men reject. That's all I could think. Ladies with tough, Olympian bodies would look ridiculous in something like this. And the only reason why she didn't get the same crap as Jennifer is that she used red, white, and blue. This outfit was just as girly and inappropriate as the losing one.
Kenley: Yet another inappropriately super-girly outfit. Either none of these people did adequate research or no one was smart enough to apply the new information into their creation. Plus, Kenley has managed to annoy me even more than she already has. The previews for next week do not bode well for me either.
Korto: [WINNER] I could only think of bad Tommy Hilfiger. The light leather idea was great, but it just looked so cheaply made, hanging on the model without any shape or embellishment. And the pants were scarily thin. Was this outfit deserving of a win? Yes, but only in the sense that it wasn't quite as crappy as the other designers' work. In any other challenge, this would have flown right under the radar.
Leanne: This was okay, I suppose. The part around the waist was really unflattering, though.
Stella: Everyone that was watching with me groaned when Stella's model rounded the corner. What drove her to do that ridiculous cut around the belly button? I must know. Really, her choice of black wasn't bad at all, but some of her other decisions were extremely questionable. If she had adjusted the sleeve a bit to look a little less, umm, horrible and fixed the aforementioned crazy belly button cut-out, it would have been a solid outfit for the occasion.
Suede: I don't think Suede referred to himself in the third person in this episode. I consider this a victory. His dress reminded me of this Miu Miu one (I couldn't remember the name, so just check out the third photo here).
Terri: I was waiting for the judges to comment on the state of the model's boobs. They looked like they were about to burst from that super-tight top! It was crazy and no one mentioned it. Instead, they almost let her win! When skinny model boobs come dangerously close to exploding, you know there's something horribly wrong. To give Terri some credit, I could tell where she was coming from. Her idea for the outfit was fantastic, but the execution was rather messy.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
8-07-2008 @ 9:12AM
Sarah said...
that was horrible! either they got the challenge in a super literal way or they completely missed the memo. in the top 3, i would have exchanged Leanne's outfit with Joe's cause there is no excuse for a skort. but damn! this season of PR is like a bad clip show.
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8-07-2008 @ 9:17AM
cdawg said...
I fell asleep during it so I didn't watch, (YAWN boring season ok). HOWEVER, just looking at the designs, the skort one, the winning one, and the last one (Terri) were my favorites. Suede's wasn't so bad but he annoys the crap out of me. As for the skort issue - it's great for golf and tennis! And honestly, think about Olympic athletes at the opening ceremony - this was probably one of the most appropriate outfits. I'm most happy with Korto's - in fact, I'd totally wear that outfit (if the pants came with lining of course!)
I think Joe and Korto are the most talented.
Jerrels was ridiculous. I think the girly ones were horrid also. However, the girl that got kicked off definitely wasn't the worst. Not appropriate per se, but pretty decently made and something I'd wear.
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8-07-2008 @ 12:23PM
deebopalula said...
I agree with almost everything you say cdawg but I would add another group that skorts are appropriate for: toddlers and young girls. To quote my daughters "We can't go on the monkey bars in a regular skirt, Mom!".
I also liked Leanne's design. She's my favorite so far this season. Interesting thing about Korto - when I saw the picture above, I immediately said to myself "That looks like a Korto design". I think she's the only one so far that has such a strongly identifiable style - even if I don't always like it. This particular one was o.k.
After checking out all the designs, I was left wondering if some of the competitors even knew what the Olympics are since so many of them failed so miserably.
8-07-2008 @ 9:54AM
Christina said...
Just because we don't see the judges mention something, it doesn't mean they didn't. The runway judging can go for more than two hours. They probably edited out any critiques of Terri's because it was top two.
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8-07-2008 @ 5:18PM
edgore said...
Suede referred to Suede in the third person at some point during last night's episode. Not in an interview pieces, but in some bit of background conversation. I know this because I wanted to punch him.
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8-07-2008 @ 1:33PM
Karen said...
I loved the skort.
And I liked Jennifers outfit the best. I'm totally ok with not using the red/white and blue, but do think it would have helped her.
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8-07-2008 @ 1:39PM
Rocketboy said...
The skort was fine for what it was intended to do. I think that you are being WAY to hard on Joe's design. Blayne's was much better than it started, but it looks too warm for summer. A pox on all of the retro designs, do we need to call out each one? Keith's wasn't bad, but way to dressy.
And was it me, or did Terri's look like the boobs were half sticking out. And again, way too warm for summer.
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8-07-2008 @ 3:48PM
Scott said...
Most Olympic athletes are strong, muscular, and thickly built. I'd love to see the female shot put or discus athletes in ANY of these outfits, which were clearly designed for and about pencil-thin runway models.
Ridiculous.
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8-07-2008 @ 2:59PM
Europa said...
Man! If they keep this [crap] up I just may give up on this season. I'm usually exhausted from work anyway, and with it being "hump-day," I'm thinking I could just skip PR, watch my local 9PM news instead, and then go straight to bed! Geeeze! It's a sad day.
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8-07-2008 @ 4:34PM
Liz said...
I don't get what is so bad about the skort. Yes its kind of goofy but really, you choose to complain about that when there are all these other atrocities on the runway??? Joe should have won in my opinion. He is the only one who "got" the challenge.
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8-07-2008 @ 4:51PM
Piper said...
Suede used the idiotic third person while they were driving in the van to the Armory.
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8-07-2008 @ 5:15PM
nickmagoo said...
suede, alas, did say 'suede' when they were in the car - it was an exterior shot...plus there was a 'sexlicious' written on the chalkboard in the apartment. ugh.
and blayne, blayne, blayne...what an ignorant twit.
stella's biker chic (an oxymoron for sure) is getting tired - woman, we GET it. you're a rocker. whoop-de-freakin-do. i see her going sooner rather than later.
how could jennifer EVER think she's a 'surrealist??' she said that so often, but it made no sense. where's the caramel buttons or jellyfish zippers? now THAT'S surreal. she made a nice outfit, if a bit old timey, but what it had to do with the olympics i have no idea...these folks are seriously disappointing me.
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8-07-2008 @ 5:18PM
nickmagoo said...
i also can;t believe not ONE of the designers thought of using the olympic rings symbol!!! really, what a great multi-colored design. there's a really sore lack of imagination so far this season.
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8-08-2008 @ 2:21PM
Rocketboy said...
Well, if they did then Project Runway would have to pay out mega bucks, or censor it out.
8-07-2008 @ 6:06PM
navstar said...
Daniel's wolf-boy brown colored contacts bug the crap of me. creepy!
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8-07-2008 @ 11:08PM
La-Di-Dah said...
Honestly, #11 and #12, you guys crack me up. The episode cracked me up too. Jerrell's outfit especially looked like an olympian from the '40s escaped from the psych ward (in that ridiculous hat) and time-jumped to the now. I have been a fan of Korto, making things that are loose, but make a woman (curvy or not) look good (except a few people did not like the fins on the green dress, but she had a cool idea). I am ecstatic that she won for a nice summery, cool white with light leather vest. The skort of Joe's? did not look all that bad eit sporty-rific and the zipper thing was cool (he had good ideas). I did not really get Terri's outfit, but they got her, so I am happy with her.
What no one has mentioned is that dumbass Daniel is getting sabotaged by Kenley, and 'he don't even know it.' Tim comes up to you and tells you wonder woman = athlete = good (he could have screwed up the execution, but the idea of a strong iconic figure representing America was not bad at all) but he chose to listen to chirping Kenley and almost get kicked off. Hopefully, next week, when she laughs at him, he will get a clue.
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8-07-2008 @ 11:09PM
La-Di-Dah said...
Honestly, #11 and #12, you guys crack me up. The episode cracked me up too. Jerrell's outfit especially looked like an olympian from the '40s escaped from the psych ward (in that ridiculous hat) and time-jumped to the now. I have been a fan of Korto, making things that are loose, but make a woman (curvy or not) look good (except a few people did not like the fins on the green dress, but she had a cool idea). I am ecstatic that she won for a nice summery, cool white with light leather vest. The skort of Joe's? did not look all that bad eit sporty-rific and the zipper thing was cool (he had good ideas). I did not really get Terri's outfit, but they got her, so I am happy with her.
What no one has mentioned is that dumbass Daniel is getting sabotaged by Kenley, and 'he don't even know it.' Tim comes up to you and tells you wonder woman = athlete = good (he could have screwed up the execution, but the idea of a strong iconic figure representing America was not bad at all) but he chose to listen to chirping Kenley and almost get kicked off. Hopefully, next week, when she laughs at him, he will get a clue.
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8-07-2008 @ 11:14PM
La-Di-Dah said...
oh, and I love Apolo. And he was a very good judge (good logical statements and right amount of passion for the olympics opening ceremony/"olympic catwalk"). Go, ap...ple-of-my-eye
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8-08-2008 @ 9:15AM
StillBash said...
I don't watch this show but boy you made me chuckle :-)
Half of these designs made me want to order a '50s-style milkshake, grease my hair and tell McFly to beat it.
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8-09-2008 @ 12:29PM
Redhead Fangirl said...
I love reading the TV squad summaries of the shows I watch- but have one complaint:
Could you not put the photo of the winning design at the top of the feed? Two weeks in a row I didn't watch and got the RSS feed that revealed what the winning design was BEFORE I watched the show. I know not everyone is watching the show the night of...
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