TVSquad

Welcome to Super Skank Wednesday. This is where I celebrate the awesomely skanky people on the following shows: Flavor of Love, I Love New York (or whatever show Tiffany Pollard is making next), The Surreal Life, Charm School, and Miss Rap Supreme.

After the jump, I'll talk about this Monday's Flavor of Love 3 Reunion, The Bad Girls Club reunion from last week called "Unfinished Business," and Miss Rap Supreme.
This show has been disappointing. How can you have a cast like that and not have more drama? I mean, every week, it's more of the same: Chiba vs. Byata. This week the best drama they piece together was Chiba yelling at Byata to clean the kitchen, Byata having her period, Rece getting drunk, and Nicky2States taking care of her. Really? That's the best they could come up with? Last week, the teaser made it seem like there were new fights: Miss Cherry vs. Byata and Nicky2States vs. Chiba.

And Nicky2States is gone now -- my favorite female not-quite-a-rapper-reality-star. She's the one who caused all the drama the first week. Remember when she told off D.A.B. for being a "recovering" crackhead? By the way, did you think that she should have been eliminated? I thought her 16 bars were stronger than Rece Steele's. But, what do I know? I'm not a rapper.


How is it that Bret Michaels and Rock of Love has eclipsed Flavor Flav, the man that started it all on celebreality television? Whatever the case, after a lackluster season of Flavor of Love, we were treated to a dull and weirdly edited reunion. It was so contrived. I felt like I was watching a rerun of American Idol. Somebody get Heather Chadwell and Angelique in there to spice it up.

I have a few questions...

1. What was with the T-Rex statues?
2. What was with the editing?
3. What was with the crying?

The answer to question one is easy. It's Flav. The man wears a giant clock and a viking helmet, and carries around a bejeweled goblet. So, I guess number one shouldn't have been an issue. I was just wondering why the T-Rexes weren't huge reindeer. He said he loved them. Who doesn't love reindeer? I guess for that matter, who doesn't love T-Rexes?

Let's get to questions two and three. I think the reunion show was edited weirdly. And I'm not talkin' clever reality show editing. I'm just talkin' questionable editing choices. What did you think?

It seems to me like we missed a lot between those cuts. For example, Thing 2 didn't seem surprised at all that Flav would be breaking up with her on national television (he took a page out of Jes's book with that one). She was happy to see him then at peace with his decision to rekindle his relationship with Liz his baby-mama. (Sidenote: I hope Flav gets Liz some Crest Whitestrips. Just sayin'.) I feel like we missed the freak out in between where Thing 2 lashes out about Flav dumping her. I feel like that freak out might be on the cutting room floor. Thanks for phoning it in, editors.

That brings me to the crying. Everyone cried! And with some people, it came out of nowhere. Take Hotlanta for instance. Her interview went from "Tee hee, I drink a lot," to "Boo hoo, I need a drink." The evidence is here people. Take a look for yourselves. But, the crying wasn't all bad. The high point of the reunion was definitely Sinceer crying and the rest of the girls heckling her. And did you see her new boobs? She took a page out of New York's book with that move. I feel like the Flavorettes may have read my Guide to Celebreality Reunions.

And Sinceer called her boobs stress balls, saying she got implants because she has anger management issues. First, I wonder how long it took her to write that joke. Second, that's just plain creepy. I don't know anyone who grabs her breasts in anger when she needs to relieve stress.



Speaking of reunions...

So, I know this happened last Tuesday night, but I finish writing this article by Tuesday afternoon so I didn't include it in last week's Super Skank Wednesday. But, there's always this week! If you missed The Bad Girls Club reunion (hosted by none other than Star Jones), I included the videos.

Here's my favorite part of the video:

Lyric: I would be jealous of me too. I don't give a damn.
Tanisha: Oh, boo, you have nothing for me to be jealous of.
Lyric: Oh, please. You a cheeseburger away from obese.
Tanisha: Oh really? And you're a grasshopper, bitch. You're a grasshoppin' stick, bitch.
Lyric: You're a hater.
Tanisha: So, fall back like whoa, bitch. Cause you could never do it like me.

And it just gets better from there. I will be jacking the phrase "fall back like whoa" for the rest of the summer. I sincerely hope we see Tanisha again some day soon. That was a great reunion fight--on par with Heather Vs. Daisy and with Buckwild throwing her shoe at New York. They didn't even need Star Jones to host. Speaking of hosting talk shows, somebody needs to fire Tyra Banks or Dr. Phil or even Oprah and give Tanisha her own show.



That's it for me. Join me next week as I scrape the bottom of the barrel for skanky television until I Love Money makes its glorious debut. I may even watch Denise Richards: It's Complicated or Living Lohan. Did any of you watch them? They premiered on E! this past Monday at 10 p.m.

Good-bye for now! Happy Super Skank Wednesday!