TVSquad

If you've been having trouble touching yourself recently, it may be because the Pope is in the States. Because he doesn't really have anything better to do, President Bush picked up the Pope from the airport. More coverage has been promised for Wednesday night, so I guess anyone that was expecting some in-depth Popewatch was sorely disappointed.

"House of Pain" (the alternate was "Itty-Bitty Torture Committee", which is so much better): To further creep out the entire country, Bush admitted that six of the top members of his administration have extensively gone through what is considered torture. No wonder CIA Director George Tenet and company have freely and happily repeated that the government does not torture. Their definition probably stops just short of killing the interrogation subject. Asf for Condoleezza Rice's chuckle-inducing evasive maneuvering from that interview clip, it really shouldn't have been so chuckle-inducing. Ha-HA! Sadist government.

And on that note... The night's guest was Jack Goldsmith, former presidential legal adviser and author of The Terror Presidency: Law and Judgment Inside the Bush Administration. Whoa-ho! An interview only seven minutes into the show? Starting this early made me think it was going to be a super-intense three-part interview. It ended up being a two-parter, jumping over the commercial break, followed by a weird shift to a commentator piece and the Moment of Zen. I guess Goldsmith's discussion tied too closely to the "House of Pain" segment to not attach him to it and continue the flow.

Anyway, the interview was an in-depth discussion of the government's spin on interrogation and the fine line between intense questioning and torture. Goldsmith had a wee bit of trouble rolling with the jokes, but it was a fair interview overall. The discussion about the administration's secrecy was interesting and Jon even made a few good points. Props to that night's audience for not giving into the clapter!





Jumping from waterboarding talk to... sports! Naturally. Special Commentator Kristen Schaal dropped by to talk about some of the controversies surrounding the Beijing Olympics. That China/Tibet protest business may be a touchy subject, but Kristen thinks the main issue lies in China's treatment of women, specifically in the Olympics' promotional materials. Only two of the five Olympic mascots are women! For shame, adorably slutty mascots, for shame. Despite the fact that this was pretty funny (over-enthusiastic Asian children are an instant crowd-pleaser), I still don't feel like Schaal has a place on a fake news team like this. What is her personality's real news network equivalent? It still feels like they brought a random hipster comedian to joke around about some current event. I mean, they already have Demetri Martin for that spot, but at least he owns up to it and takes on the youth-oriented coverage. Don't get me wrong, because I really like Schaal (go, Mel!), but is she really right for TDS?

Moment of Zen: Oh, John Ashcroft, how I don't miss you so.