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Battlestar Galactica should be called Battlestar Ga-suck-tica

Battlestar GalacticaI finally caved. After all the hype and all the buzz, I gave in. I'm sick of avoiding headlines on blogs and it's frustrating to hear everyone chatting away about "Cylons this..." and "Caprica that..." while I stand by mute and clueless. I've finally started to watch Battlestar Galactica.

I should mention that I'm not completely in the dark. I've tried before. On a couple of occasions actually. I've had a burned copy of the three hour mini-series that started it all for some time now. I could never get through it. This time, I went all out though. I even shelled out the $55 for the season one DVD set. Now, I'm through the mini-series and I'm nine episodes into the season. Four to go before the finale and all of a sudden, I've stopped. I started thinking. What if I had watched the show, right from the get-go when it premiered back in 2005 along with everyone else? Let's pretend. Let's say it is 2005 all over again and episode nine just aired last night -- the one where Tigh's estranged wife shows up. Let's pretend that seasons 2, 3 and 4 don't exist yet. Cool premise? OK...

I don't see what the big deal is.

To be completely honest, I'm a little bored. For the most part, the acting is stale and rigid, it's chock full of sci-fi clichés, endless good vs. evil rotes, and I'm really not sure that I care if the humans lose to the Cylons.

To be fair, I suppose I should preface all of this by saying that I've never been a huge sci-fi fan. The genre never really "took off" for me? Get it? That's a rocket ship pun!

Bear with me though and hear what I have to say. Picture the mind-set you were in at this point in 2005 when you only had a few season one eps left. Were you really that enthralled? Were you already anticipating season two? Here's some of what's bugging me...

  • The Cylons don't seem all that smart: They keep screwing up! It's a wonder Adama and his people haven't beat them at their own game of cat and mouse. If these things are so good, then why haven't they won? Which leads me to my next point....
  • The humans don't seem all that smart either: They're scrambling around just as bad and at times, it's comical. I specifically remember one scene where a bunch of Viper pilots were goofing off around a pile of live rockets and one went off! If we're ever under attack by robots we built, I'd like to think we'd be less careless.
  • I don't buy the Cylon technology: Someone want to explain to me how they made those human Cylons? Don't actually explain it to me... I don't want to be spoiled. Again, remember "this is 2005." I'm sure the answers come in a later season. But this is a big one, and some hints now would be nice. I just don't see how they made the jump from "toaster" to full blown human like that. Why aren't there any intermediate models with metal feet, human fingers, and ears all over the place? I assume they made some mistakes perfecting the 12.
  • Baltar is a tool: I don't like him. Ignoring that fact that he got duped by Number 6 and unknowingly aided in the attack, he's still a tool. But by virtue of his knowledge and connection to the Cylons, he's a sort of anti-hero that we're forced to root for. I don't like that.
  • Now that the whole fleet knows Cylons look human...: There's no way it stays that calm. There's what? Around 40,000 people on the remaining ships at this point? There should be mass panic and widespread rioting. My point is that I don't feel like anyone is afraid or worried. As a result, I don't feel that way either. It should feel frantic. It doesn't.

Now I realize just about everyone is going to rag on me for speaking too soon, before I've watched the rest of the show and caught up. But remember my original point. This is what I would have written back in '05 if I had seen the show then. Something must have really changed, because at this point, I don't see what everyone is so frakking excited about.

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