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(S09E21) You know Big Brother 9 isn't the best of seasons when Evel Dick, winner of BB8, comes across as a breath of fresh air! I do think that the season picked up a bit more steam when they dropped the couplings and the "'Til Death Do You Part" bit from the title. But the damage was already done. They started the season with some odd half-cocked porno theme, condoms in a bowl and all, then backed off when it started bombing. At least we're back to the game of Big Brother.

Read on past the jump for my full review.

I refuse to recap the recaps. You can't make me! Not the color one pre-theme and opening credits, not the black and white one after the opening credits. I don't like the recapped recaps on the show. I don't like recapped recaps in the snow. I don't like recapped recaps anyhow. Yes, the ghost of Dr. Seuss is with me tonight. I suppose I should put him back in the closet before he takes over this review.

Okay, repeated recaps aside, it's a house divided. We know that. We've seen it other seasons. Who could forget the Nerd Herd of season six? Even BB8 was divided, perhaps not quite as evenly as this season. The show opened with James and Chelsia overacting gleefully about being nominated. Yes, it was a bit over the top. But it gave Natalie and Sheila even more to gripe about.

Sheila's right -- they're kids. James is all of 21 and I don't think Chelsia is much older. Yes, they overdid it with the dancing about the kitchen. But I get the feeling that no matter how they reacted to going on the block, Natalie and Sheila would find fault. "Oh, look. They're sulking! They should have expected it!" "Oh, they're dancing! They make me sick!"

The reactions of James and Chelsia didn't keep Natalie from running to Adam telling him what a great job he did. As I watched Adam, I notice that he just sits there almost hypnotized with the praise from Natalie at first, then both Sheila and Natalie. His eyes almost glaze over. Now, I thought that Natalie was the one who's needy in the attention arena. In his own way, I think Adam also seeks that positive reaction, but tends to get confused easily. When Ryan or Joshuah give him that same sort of "atta boy" talk, he gets the same expression. At least Natalie is a bit gender specific -- for her Mattie!

Natalie has decided that God is in control. In talking with Sheila, they thought the worst case scenario would be if James won the Power of Veto. In thinking about how the veto turned out, I wonder if she thinks God took a wrong turn.

But before veto can even be thought about, it's time for the winners of the movie to enjoy 21. In a Diary Room segment Sheila once again told us how she's the biggest fan of movies ever -- she rents them and goes to them with her son. Rents? I would think she'd own them if she was as big a buff as she claims! Sheila, Joshuah, Sharon, and Chelsia had a surprise before the movie. They were told that one of their huge cups of popcorn held the $21,000 Las Vegas trip package Ryan lost. Cue to get popcorn all over the living room! Chelsia found it and has the biggest prize given away this season in the house. They loved the movie and a good time (and a lot of calories) was had by all.

Then things went a bit awry. Out of the blue, Adam announced it was time to pick the players for the veto competition. Huh? It set off red flags with Joshuah because they usually pick them the morning of the comp, not the evening before. Would the comp be early? Not a clue from BB, just pick those partners out of the bag! Adam picked first and got Joshuah. Chelsia pulled out Sheila's name. James got the Houseguest's Choice pick and chose Sharon.

That's kind of no help for anyone except maybe Adam. Joshuah will either throw it or let Adam do whatever as long as he's not on the block. Sheila never wins comps and hates Chelsia. Sharon told us in a Diary Room bit that she can't do anything for James because she would probably go on the block if he gets off. She's definitely an ally of James, but she has to think of herself, too.

Despite their worries about the timing of the picks, all of the houseguests were nestled snug in their beads with visions of PoV necklaces in their heads when ... DAA-DAAA-DAA-DAAA. Yep, it's the Evel Dick theme music from last season and he's in the house. I personally think it would have been better if it came unexpected to the viewers instead of being mentioned on both Thursday and Sunday episodes. I realize they probably promoted the appearance for ratings sake, but it would have been more cool to be watching it not knowing he was going to create a ruckus.

I should note here that I'm not the same person who wrote last week's live eviction review. Kristin's a dear sweet person, but she doesn't like Evel Dick. I don't like all he did in the house, but I'm also a feeds watcher. The intimidation was his approach, but he also had a sincere side to him. And, as a live feeds watcher, I always liked the fact he talked to the camera with the Dick Show late at night or early in the morning. It's so boring to watch someone sit and drink coffee. He'd talk game strategy, speak about his daughter and son. It was a side to him not really seen so much on the show. I think he's on the crude side, but the mean was more of an act and it worked for him. I'm not so keen about Chelsia, James, and Joshuah comparing themselves to him or trying his tactics. Once was enough and a kid with a pink mohawk can't quite pull it off in the same way.

As we heard the music, Dick found the same pan from last year and his implements of destruction. Nah, he didn't destruct anything but the pleasant dreams of the hamsters! It was funny. "Evel Dick is in the house!" "No, he's not! Wait, he is!" He bellowed to them that the Power of Veto comp was in ten minutes and they had to scramble to wake up and get to the yard.

The backyard is done up as Club Evel. It's like the Phoenix rising from the ashes, the reincarnation of the nasty beverage drinking comp from last season. Each houseguest had to drink as many of the ten "evel" beverages as they could. For each drink completed, they earned a shot with the giant croquet mallets. Those shots were scored by the number of hoops the ball traveled through. Dick holds the record of 33 points after drinking last season. The highest score wins the Power of Veto, but if someone beats Dick's score, they win a Gibson Les Paul guitar and amp set. If no one beats Dick's score, he gets the guitar.

I could never do this sort of thing. Here are some of the drinks involved:

Ri-Dick-ulous: chili sauce, chipotle sauce, habanero sauce, Pico de Gallo
Sweet Child O'Lime: sweet pepper, lime juice
Bloody Richard: Big Brother blood. (Uh-oh!)
Eggs Bene"Dick": eggs, black coffee, bacon, Hollandaise sauce
Headbanger's Brew: lettuce, sausage, root beer
Dick's Sucker Punch: fruit punch, beets, catfish
Double Hangover Cure: grapefruit, oyster sauce, sodium bicarbonate (antacid)
Dick Jagger: pig lips, custard

Sharon was up first and made an effort although she didn't want to win. Joshuah was up second. He had no intentions of winning and wasn't about to stomach the drinks. He quit after five drinks even though Dick kept reminding him a half-million is on the line. Nope, not right now, not for Joshuah. Then came Sheila and Dick told her it was all for her son. He's been studying this group, I guess. She did better than I thought she would. Chelsia gave it her all, but the burps got to her. Eww. Adam did well, but it was James and his determination to stay in the house which did it for him. He seemed to want to identify with Dick and he definitely wants that veto!

The houseguests were alone as they went through the drinks. In the reveal Joshuah drank five drinks, Sharon and Chelsia drank six, Sheila drank seven, Adam drank eight, and James drank ten. It was onto the croquet. Again, Sheila did better than I thought she would, but in the end it was between Adam and James. Adam got 28 points and James beat him by one. James won the Power of Veto and Evel Dick gets the cool guitar.

Then the drama starts anew. Chelsia is mad because she didn't win. How quickly she snipped about James, eh? I didn't see him mocking her at all, did you? He seemed happy to win -- he knows it's the only way he can remain in the house, but he seemed sympathetic to her. James said they vowed if one had to leave, the other must remain in the house to win it all.

I do have to give some credit to Joshuah here. He is sneaky and manipulative. He has his alliance with Sharon and the other secret alliance with Ryan. He used them both in his efforts to stay off the block. He has a point. If he goes up against Chelsia, he might just get voted out even though they want her out this week. But if Sharon goes on the block, she's pretty well-liked. She'd definitely stay over Chelsia.

So, he talks to Ryan and gets him to talk to Adam. Then he talks to Sharon and gets her to go to Adam and volunteer to go on the block in place of James. Then we get to see him gloat about being such a good player and how he will win it all. He's never been on the block yet and now has convinced his partner to go on the block for him. He may have overdone the glee a tad, but he's right. At least for now, he's right.

Natalie sees right through him and still bears a grudge over some things he's said to her. She thinks he's sneaky and campaigns to get Adam to put him on the block. But then Ryan, under the influence of Joshuah, fights for the Sharon nomination using the same points Joshuah used with him -- James and Chelsia are a bigger threat, blah-blah. Adam just sat there with his glazed hypnotized look in his eyes.

But when it came time for the veto ceremony, it was evident who Adam listened to more. As expected, James removed himself from the block. Chelsia was better about it saying he deserved to use the veto and he won it fair and square. Then Adam said it was a hard decision, but one option existed which would keep his own risk level at a minimum. Okay, that didn't make a heck of a lot of sense. He should have just said, "I'm putting Sharon on the block because Chelsia will go home when up against her. I'm friendly with Joshuah and Ryan, but Natalie thinks I'm friendly with her and Sheila. I'm so scared of James coming after me! I never wanted to be Head of Household! Have mercy on my soul!"

Now, that would have been cool. So, it's Sharon and Chelsia on the block for the live eviction tomorrow night.