TVSquad

They enjoy primping in the Big Brother 9 house, don't they? Alas, they can only primp their exteriors. If this group of hamsters could primp their language (so the aired shows wouldn't have so many bleeped out bits), their behaviors (so they're not ranting at each other for hours on end), their sexual activities (so I don't think I'm watching bad amateur porn and feel all creepy about it) ... could it still be good TV?

I think so. Language will always be an issue. But I think back to one of my favorite seasons, the second season. There was some cuddling, but not like outright porn. Ah, but this year they gave 'em a bowl of condoms. Now that I've had no spoiler information on the main page (yes, there is a method to my madness), read past the jump for show spoilers and the latest news from inside the house!

But first, this is where we left off: Matt and Natalie won POV and used it to save themselves, Adam and Sheila went up on the block with Ryan and Allison, Operation Gardener is the code name to get rid of Allison because she plants seeds, everyone agreed to make Ryan and Allison think they're staying when they're the target, then it's turned into a possible flip-flop as James and Matt won't tell each other who they're voting for, and finally ... Matt has made promises to both sides that he'll vote to keep them.

Now, if James and Matt would just work together, they could have a vote of 2-0 to eliminate either couple with Joshuah and Sharon unable to change their vote. If they don't have a meeting of the minds and each votes for a different couple, it's up to Joshuah and Sharon to break the tie. Of course, with the way Joshuah feels about Allison, he'll surely vote her out.

Matt/Natalie and Chelsia/James could be a very strong block against another strong couple -- Joshuah and Sharon. If they teamed up with Ryan and Allison, they could eliminate Adam and Sheila (because they're twits) this week, then Joshuah and Sharon the next as they couldn't compete for head of house and would have to win veto to save themselves.

Oh, wait. Changes to the game are coming this week. But they don't know that!

Here are the happenings from the day:

• Joshuah danced around with glee at the thought of leaving his taped goodbye message to Allison. Or did he dance because Big Brother played a Hannah Montana wake-up song for him?
• Sharon thinks they're going to bring back single people from the previously evicted couples. They've all figured out that the season will be too short with a couple eliminated each week. They are unaware that all evicted houseguests (except Neil who left voluntarily) have been sequestered.
• Allison kept trying to convince James and Chelsia it would be better to keep her and Ryan over Sheila and Adam. Same old-same old.
• James told Allison that she should have voted out Matt and Natalie last week. Chelsia said Joshuah wouldn't be as mad at them if they had. (Remember, the original plan was Alex/Amanda, but then the house decided to switch to Matt/Natalie, then it switched back.)
• Natalie can't think of a reason for James and Chelsia to vote for Allison to stay. James said that if Matt and Natalie vote out Allison, they'll lose Allison and Ryan's vote at the end. (Now, that doesn't make sense, does it? If they vote out Adam and Sheila, they lose their vote, too. Twisted logic alert!)
• Chelsia doesn't like how James is handling things. Apparently he does still intend on voting to evict Ryan and Allison, but wants to tell them why first. She doesn't think that's a good idea.
• Sheila is getting frustrated with the cloak of mystery surrounding the vote.
• Sheila once again gave the end date of the signed contract at May 3.
• When Allison approached James he told her that Chelsia and he want to sit down and talk tomorrow morning with her and Ryan.
• Joshuah and Sharon got their turn with the HOH digital camera.
• Sheila and Allison had a talk about the lesbian lie and Joshuah's anger about it. When Allison said it was her fault, Sheila spoke up and said it was both of them.
• Allison doesn't want to go to sequester if Jen is there and will yell at her, plus Amanda and Alex are mad at her. (And so is tho house. Has she checked out a desert island lately?)
• Sharon said even if they split up the couples, she will stay allied with Joshuah and James will stay with Chelsia.
• A few are concerned about the Hudson River Virus and the meaning of a siren.

And, there you go. Despite the cloak of mystery about the vote, I think we'll most likely see Allison and Ryan evicted unless BB changes it up and does the unexpected.