TVSquad

Jon started off by pointing out that the other night's guest, Phil Simms, called him "Tom" at the end of their interview. I could have sworn he called him "Josh", but I thought I was just hearing things. I suggest that Jon relieve the cutting pain of having an idol screw up one's name by convincing himself that Simms was just so floored to be in his presence, he got nervous. Instant restoration of self-esteem!

President Bush delivered his final State of the Union address the other night. He encouraged the nation to do stuff and promised to do some other stuff and then talked about some other, other stuff. Anyway, we're strong. I swear I actually shuddered a little bit when Cheney smiled. That damn inverted scowl makes me feel cold deep in the pit of my soul. I would also like to point out that, for some reason, Jon's Bush impression has been slipping into weirdly hilarious zones lately. He suddenly turned into a Mr. T/George Jefferson hybrid during the Kyoto Protocol joke.

Governor Kathleen Sebelius of Kansas taped a response to the State of the Union and somehow managed to work in a lot of strangely Evil Dead-y repeatings of "Join usss". I recommend this video as a perfect substitute to those overpriced soothing sea sound CDs. It's called inflection, lady.

The night's guest was presidential historian and Daily Show buddy, Doris Kearns Goodwin. I'm not much of an American history buff, but I love it when Goodwin comes on the show. She always tells fantastic stories and this interview was a real treat, because Goodwin wasn't there to promote a book about a specific president and shared all sorts of great information on various presidents' State of the Union addresses. Okay, I've decided to add Goodwin to my ultimate teacher line-up. She'd teach me American History third period, right after my Science class with Neil deGrasse Tyson and before my appointment with Guidance Counselor Mr. Rogers.

Jon/Stephen: Moment of Zen: The state of our union is strong, or so said Bush again and again and again.

Colbert Report: Stephen spent a good three minutes making googly-eye clams. Way to kill time, my man. He's also running for president in the Marvel universe, apparently, which makes him pretty much gives him all the geek cred he'll ever need. And then Jon showed up with some "MTV-age Jon" footage to help waste time! It was lovely.