TVSquad

When NBC's veteran Law & Order returns to the network lineup, Reuters is reporting it will be in its classic Wednesday 10/9 Central time slot. The 18th season begins Wednesday, January 2 with a two-hour premiere. After suffering its worst ratings ever last season -- though in its defense it was moved to the ratings dead zone of Friday nights -- speculation ran rampant that the parent series of the L&O empire may fold along with its mid-rated sibling Law & Order: Criminal Intent.

In the end, both got picked up, sort of. Criminal Intent was relegated to USA instead of NBC for its first run. But on January 10, when L&O settles back into its old time slot, it's new lead-in is going to be the broadcast network premiere of those USA CI episodes. If NBC needs more filler, we can look forward to America's Got Law & Order as a reality lead-in for CI, where Americans try to get away with breaking the law on live television!

Jerry Springer: "Hi and welcome back to America's Got Law & Order, the show where Americans try and get away with breaking the law. And considering we have a team of police detective and prosecutors here in the studio with us, I'd say the odds are stacked pretty strong against you. Next up we have Floyd Gunderson. Come on out here, Floyd. And what have you got for us."

Floyd Gunderson [walking out in a bathrobe]: "Well, this is probly the thing I'm best at, Jerry. By the way I just love your show. My sister Lurlene was on there with her brother-uncle and they wuz fightin' with my other sister just cause she and my dad--"

Jerry: "Uh, Uh, that's nice Floyd. And thank you! But we're here about you right now. What are you gonna do for us tonight."

Floyd: "Well apparently there's a law about gettin' nekkid in public but I've gotten away with it lots of times so I thought I'd--" [The bald security guy from The Jerry Springer Show tackles Floyd just as he's reaching for the sides of his robe.]

Jerry [walking off-set]: "Alright, that's it! Who comes up with this ****! I mean, seriously! I thought my show was crap!"

Cut to a commercial for the GE Profile Dishwasher with SmartDispense Technology. Dishes so clean you could eat off of them. Pan out to Liz Lemon and Jack Donaghy watching the commercial.

Liz Lemon: "That's a catchy slogan, Jack. I mean, isn't that what dishes--"

Jack Donaghy: "Thank you, Lemon. I came up with that one myself."

Liz: "Well I never would have guessed that.

Jack: "I wanted something that emphasizes just how clean this dishwasher makes dishes. Imagine eating food off of your own dishes."

Liz: "Yeah. Amazing. But what about the show."

Jack: "Oh, we'll just cancel it. Put Deal or No Deal on again. What else is Howie Mandel doing? He's not going on Dancing with the Stars, is he?"