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Smallville: Bizarro (season premiere)

Smallville: Bizarro
(S07E01) "I'm like you, only more bizarre."

Somebody Saaaaaavvvvveeeee meeeeeeee ... from interminably long summer breaks from TV shows. I really wondered when this day would come, and it has finally arrived. When we last left our hero(es), Clark literally had an out-of-body experience and split into two halves. Thus was Bizarro born. He's like the Dark Clark (Kal) from seasons past, except he's got a much deeper voice. Testosterone kicks in on Smallville, apparently. Plus, Bizarro Clark has that jagged, crystalline face that you've come to expect from all the comic books, but it pops in and out, like he just needs some Clearasil or something.

It's refreshing that this season opens up right where we left off, and plus seeing Clark save that little kid and his dad in total Superman-style makes it all worth it. Was that serious heat-vision action or what? Finally, it seems like he's finally getting ready to wear the cape. That little kid's "whoa" was a great capper to the opening teaser. Thank you, Smallville writers, thank you.

I mean, Bi-Clark-o impaled and then frying a poor motorist, Lex trapped in the submerged cop car, Chloe apparently dead, underwater dead bodies left and right, Lionel floating in the river ... wow. And that's all in the first five minutes after the teaser. I guess I can forgive summer breaks if it means the show is gonna start out this good. Plus, we have an entire season remaining. Where will they go from here? My money is on a Clark / Kara / Superman / Supergirl mega-powered fight at some point during the season. Clash of the Cousins.

Well, my money was on that, until Bi-Clark-o got frisky with Lois' backside. Yowsa. Sure, he's a lot like Kal, but I didn't think he'd go from pounding on Clark to trying to bed one of the Double-Ls right away. He barely had time to heal himself with a super-zap from the Kryptonite before heading off in search of some amorous affections. Since being a Bizarro means you the opposite of your other self, then he's definitely acting on the impulses that Clark never does.

Anyhow, we also get treated to the beginnings of a Mr. Miyagi / Daniel-san training to be going on with the Manhunter and Clark. About time he had someone showing him what's what. Of course, it just serves as a prelude to a fairly decent Bi-Clark-o / Clark slugfest. My only problem is why has it taken Clark so long to find out that sunlight is what powers him? You think he might have picked up on that awhile back. Anyhow, when Clark super-uppercut Bizarro into the stratosphere, did you notice that red blur swooshing in and grabbing him? My bet is that Kara (Supergirl) has him stashed in that water tower she takes off from, although I have no idea why. Maybe he's her super-pet. Zing.

So, we don't get to see much of Kara in this episode, but since she's been added to the opening credits, you can be sure we will. Honestly, it's pretty cool to see someone in a pseudo-costume and flying around on this show. It's what we've all been waiting for, and she's a lot easier on the eyes than Clark is. You've still got me hooked, Smallville, now keep it going.

Best Moments From Smallville: Bizarro

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