TVSquad

The always lovable Tony Snow shared some more stuff about the never-ending Alberto Gonzalez business. Apparently, the firings were not based on performance and, not only that, Snow claimed that he never said the firings were based on performance in the first place. You'd think that, by now, these folks would be more careful in claiming what they have or haven't said in the past because The Daily Show has magical montage-making abilities to highlight contradictions. And I think Tony Snow was actually wearing the same tie in those contradicting clips. I have no idea why, but I feel like that's insult to injury... As if the tie should have the memory of his speech from three months ago. Perhaps this is a sign I need sleep.

"Clusterf@#k to the White House: http.//.indecision.2008.net/clusterf@3k.html": Aww, I was all excited when "http" popped up because I thought they had made a real website (like Conan's Horny Manatee), but then that period crushed my soul. I'm still blown away by the creepy web presence of the 2008 presidential candidates. MySpace keeps pushing McCain on me. Speaking of creepy, Jon singing "Let's Get Hillary" to the tune of "Let's Get Physical" was weird enough, but those tiny shorts were too much. Or "too little," I guess.

"Weatherman Report": For the first time in, um, forever, The Weather Channel has stirred up a bit of controversy. But if they want to do scary right, they really do have to take some lessons from that Oklahoma local weather promo. I just watched the full thing on YouTube and my brain just exploded... WITH AMAZEMENT.

The night's guest was Angelina Jolie, star of A Mighty Heart and all-around MILF. I was terrified by how little room she took up in the chair. A second Jolie could have sat in the space next to her. And I thought those polite laughs after Jon's flirtation were a little awkward, but then I thought, well, what could Jolie have possibly said to that comment about a burka being unable to contain her hotness? By the way, I've seen what Jolie looks like in a $26 dress, and I'm pretty sure she'd look better in a garbage bag than most people would look in a million dollar gown.

Next week, on Monday: Steve Carell! Forget Jolie's audience, I'm jealous of Monday's crowd. Moment of Zen: Whoa. Gravel just peered into my very soul.