TVSquad

That's right, A&E has a new reality series, Confessions of a Matchmaker, set to debut on June 16 at 10:00 p.m. that is all about the art of making matches. Starting with the lumberjacks who chop down the trees for the matches and ending with the factory workers who create the match heads out of phosphorus sesquisulfide and potassium chlorate.

Hang on, someone just told me that's not what this series is about at all. It's actually about Patti Novak, a professional matchmaker who helps her clients find that special someone by using her own brand of "tough love." I'm guessing Novak's approach doesn't involve a lot of potassium chlorate, but maybe it should. I'm just saying.

The press release for this new series describes Novak as "the Simon Cowell of dating," which I guess means no one with even an ounce of self-respect should give a crap what she thinks. Or maybe it just means she likes to wear black shirts that are a couple sizes too small.

In the series premiere, "Charlie & Ashley," Novak helps out an overweight man who was once Mr. Nude Universe. I'm not sure if that falls under the category of "Art" or "Entertainment."