TVSquad

(S08E11) Five models remain - Renee, Jaslene, Dionne, Natasha and Brittany. Who will be eliminated tonight?

If I was a betting man and judging from the previews and looking at the dainty tear falling from her eye in the picture to the right, I'd put my cash on Brittany.

I wish my own personal short term memory would help me forget her, but all throughout this episode the show edit kept reminding me that she's here and as annoying as ever. She played it up for the camera every opportunity she had. Has she really been this aggravating all season?

It was a good point on Dionne's part to mention that Brittany recalled all her lines from the "Girl Who Impresses Pedro" episode. I'm actually a little upset with myself for not remembering this first. I probably would have, but when I was 5-years-old I was riding my bike over some railroad tracks and this freight train came out of nowhere and knocked me 7,000 feet into the air and I cracked my head on this passing airplane and...you get the idea.

I'm thinking Brittany would have been better off playing the Guy Pearce in Memento card all season. You know what I mean.

Forgetting the other girls and having to pull a photo out of her pocket occasionally to remind her of their names. Writing, "I am a contestant on America's Next Top Model" on her arm with a Sharpie and pulling up her sleeve every hour to remind herself where she is. Putting yellow Post it notes on the fridge and walls reminding her that she may need to eat and use the potty every couple of hours.

If she'd have done all that, I just might have bought the whole short term memory deal. Never happened.

Anyhow, the girls are still kicking it "down under" and they spent some time at Pricilla's Model Management agency preparing for their next challenge. The only thing I can think to say about this is Johdi Meares is dead sexy.

The girls were going to be judged on personality, portfolio, and runway.

Based on those judgments I would put Natasha as having the best personality, Renee as having the best portfolio, and Jaslene as having the best runway walk. Of course, they wanted the single best person in all three categories, and I haven't a clue how to make that call since they all lacking in one way or another.

Later on, Wholahay confirmed her jankiness by asking the people if she could keep the swimsuit, top, and shoes that she tried on. I think the only way this portion could have been any better is if she would have had to use some really random item like toilet paper or a bar of soap and have her ask, "This toilet paper is so soft and this soap is very foamy. Can I keep this?" That would have been off the charts on the ghetto fabulous scale.

As for Brittany's attempt at runway walking with one of the agencies. Um, my 13 month old daughter just learned to walk ka few weeks ago, falls about every 10-15 steps, but she still has a better runway walk than Brittany. I found this hysterical.

How priceless was the glee Jaslene, Renee, and Dionne showed when they realized Natasha and Brittany hadn't made it. Even greater was Brittany's absolute breakdown when she didn't arrive to the agency on time. This was reality TV at its finest.

Natasha shocked me when she busted out the, "I want you to know that some people have war in their country", referring to Brittany right when she was on the verge of spontaneous combustion. Natasha has a point. A, there are much more important things to be crying about. B. Natasha was also late arriving at the agency and she wasn't flipping out. Just another example of the Russian princess's class.

It was also sweet of Natasha to hug Jaslene when she found out she'd won the challenge. Natasha proves over and over that she's a really nice girl. Again, I feel bad pegging her as the troublemaker early in this season. If we had more people like Natasha, the world would be a lot calmer, not to mention a lot prettier.

The two shots below that that Nigel Barker took of Jaslene and Dionne were absolutely gorgeous particularly for Cha Cha. Not a hint of queen draggy to be seen. If these pictures were shown during the vote off portion of the show, I'm sure both girls would have heard some stellar reviews.





Jaslene said she wants to see RachelRenee go home because "she looks hungry for the money and she looks old." I found that comment a little strange. Seriously, which one of the girls isn't there for the money in a roundabout way? It came off as a little better-than-thou of Jaslene to imply she wasn't there for the same reason. And if Renee looks old, Jaslene looks draggy. Sorry, had to defend my demon.

Regardless of all the crappy comments I've thrown at Brittany this week, she blew her photo shoot up. Is it me or does Brit look like a completely different person when you see her normally and when you see her in photos? It's a strange dichotomy between the two. I'd like to hang out with Brittany in photos. I just want to hang the Brittany we typically see..

Natasha also brought the heat this week in her photos. I can't even say i agree with the judges critique of her pursed lips or "the turtle" as Tyra and Miss J so eloquently put it.

It seemed a little strange that you couldn't really get a clear look at Jaslene's face in either of the her photos. At the same time, it's pretty amazing that she still came out looking hot in both of them. She had a really good showing this week.

The judges didn't seem to like Dionne's photo's in the least this week. She looked gorgeous to me, but I suppose she did seem a bit distracted in both of them. My guess is she was too busy thinking about all the swimsuits and accoutrements she smuggled out of the modeling agency earlier in the episode. Ghetto indeed but absolutely hilarious.

Renee looked lovely in her photos. I still think she takes some of the prettiest photos of the bunch, but I admit she seems to suffer from "looks better in photos than seeing her normal" syndrome I described above with Brittany.

As predicted, Brittany and her many excuses is booted off the show, and I say good riddance. I find Brittany pretty attractive, think she's taken lovely photos, and could have won this thing had she not come across so unflatteringly for such a long time

I have to give this episode a 6 for high dramatic content and entertainment value. Brittany stole the show, but her actions ultimately cost her the competition.

The previews for next week look pretty interesting. We're all the way down to four and the finale is imminent. See you next week.