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Heather Mills faked it

Heather Mills falls in Dancing with the StarsAre you going to sit there and tell me that you've been watching Dancing with the Stars just for the dancing and expect me to believe it? It seems like the entire country is waiting for Heather Mills' leg to come flying off into the audience. It seems like that day is almost upon us.

If that day ever comes, it won't be an accident, but a calculated, manipulated piece of choreography. Mills' performance last night serves as a taste of things to come.

Mills danced an almost perfect number and, for some reason, felt the need to stage a mistake and choreograph a fall. Her partner also choreographed a caring response to her fall. I would have an easier time believing this blunder if she looked genuinely mortified.

In other TV celebrity body part news, Regis Philbin is recovering after his bypass. He called into Live! With Regis and Kelly yesterday and admitted some interesting things about his love life.Regis announced yesterday that he plans to return to the show April 26. He also made another surprising announcement about his sex life; now that his heart is in working order, it seems his libido has also been improved as captured in this TV's Top 5! moment.

Well, it's nice to know that Heather's leg is staying put for now and Regis' heart is in all the right places.

Watch this and other TV's Top 5! moments here.

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