TVSquad

Dancing With the Stars (Mon., 8PM ET, ABC) 4th season premiere
Don't you just love seeing which "celebrities" come out of the woodwork to go Dancing every season? This edition's motley crew includes an Olympic speedskater, a female boxer, a beloved sitcom veteran and a Beatle's ex-wife. Maybe it's crass, but I'm rooting for Heather Mills, simply to see if her prosthetic leg truly does fall off (you can even bet on it happening online). But odds favor former '90210' star Ian Ziering, whose partner, Cheryl Burke, is going for three wins in a row.

Tori and Dean: Inn Love (Tue., 10:30PM ET, Oxygen) series premiere
So, you're a celebrity, but your career is on a downward trajectory. Just star in your reality show! The newest entrant in the "celebreality" sweepstakes is Tori Spelling and her husband, Dean McDermott. Surprisingly, Tori is lovably ditzy, while Dean seems like a normal nice guy (not unlike a former reality TV couple). She's pregnant and they're broke. The couple wants to open a modern B&B, but they need cash, so they invite the world into their home to sell Tori's junk.

Survivor: Fiji (Wed., 8PM ET, CBS)
Don't worry, you're looking at the right day. Survivor is on Wednesday this week thanks to March Madness. About halfway through the season, 'Fiji' shakes things up by realigning the two tribes. Moto's been living large in their luxurious camp, but how will some of them fare when forced to live in Ravu's hellhole? And when two strong castaways are paired together, will anyone be able to challenge them?

Ugly Betty (Thu., 8PM ET, ABC)
Poor Betty. First, she had to endure her crush Henry's girlfriend, Charlie. Now, she has to play girlfriend to a gay guy! When Marc's mother (guest star Patti LuPone) comes to town, he begs Betty to pretend they're in a relationship. (Sidenote: How could Marc's mother not realize he's gay? Seriously.) Not only that, he wants Betty to invite both of them to dinner in Queens. Meanwhile, Daniel and Alexis continue to butt heads over their family's legal problems.

Miss USA 2007 (Fri., 9PM ET, NBC)
A year ago, nobody would've thought Miss USA could be so controversial. Then, last December, the current title holder, Tara Conner, was nearly stripped of her crown after boozin' and taking drugs, but she went to rehab and pageant owner Donald Trump gave her a second chance. Now, Conner ends her reign, with 51 contestants vying to become the next (perhaps scandal free?) Miss USA. But I can't help thinking Trump's enjoying all this controversy; he loves nothing more than the spotlight.

Battlestar Galactica (Sun., 10PM ET, SCI FI) 3rd season finale
Gaius Baltar's trial has been even better than O.J.'s. Last week, we learned President Laura Roslin's cancer had returned and that mysterious music was emanating from the Galactica. In season three's finale, Tigh investigates what the music means, and leads him to others who can hear it too. Are they Cylons? Meanwhile, Roslin continues to have kamala-induced dreams. The trial ends with a stunning verdict, just as the Cylons show up to attack.

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