TVSquad

(S01E04) Recipe for I Pity the Fool: take one confrontational situation, add a cast of various characters, and then toss in Mr. T. Bake for 30 minutes, sprinkling with plenty of "Fools," and you there you have it. Serve with a side of cheese.

This week T gets a letter from the East Coast Dance Company, where the stage moms are clashing with the teacher, Leann. It's really not a pretty scene. Lots of women yelling at each other, and kids rolling their eyes. You got your work cut out for you, T.

T tries to get the moms and Leann to get along, but nothing works. It's surprising that they haven't started punching each other over the upcoming dance recital. T decides to observe Leann's class and ends up getting asked to be in the recital. Holy setup, Batman!

Anyhow, why T learns twirl, and then sends the moms out on a mission to learn trust. They have to run a car wash to raise money for the recital. Business is of course slow until T gets involved, and then it's wash-a-palooza. As the car wash begins to rake in the dough, T chants "TRUST, TRUST, TRUST" at them. So, they learned their lesson? I'm still not sure how that T-magic works.

In one of the most disturbing scenes from the show, one of the stage moms is dresses in a tiny white halter top and tight jean shorts for the car wash. The other moms are dressed like ... well, moms. Near the end of the wash there's a real "Moms Gone Wild" moment involving that halter top, and a bucket of water. We kid you not.

The moms present the money to Leann, and she instantly snarls at them and wants to know what the catch is. "Youse don't do nothing if it doesn't benefit your children. I don't what what else youse want from me." Ouch. T takes Leann to his house to cook her a meal and knock talk some sense into her. Speaking of, where does T live? It looks like someone's one bedroom apartment. T cooks burgers and chews Leanna out. However, he talks for so long that he ends up burning the burgers. Insert hilarity here.

So, everyone is on the same track now, and ready for the recital ... but Leann's daughter has a nasty fall and disaster strikes. She gets rushed off to the hospital with Leann, leaving the moms to save the recital. I guess the car wash training regimen really paid off because they manage to pull it off miraculously. At the last minute, Leann returns with her daughter who only had a scare, she's fine. It's triumph all around, folks.

So, the show goes off without a hitch until it's time for T's twirl. Will he pull it off? Will he collapse in disgrace? I'll just have to let you wonder how it all turned out. Just wait until they cut to the picture of Leann crying in the wings, so emotional.

Some T-isms from this week's show:

"I don't have any degrees, and I don't use fancy words ... I give people a big sip of T!"

"I'm never gonna make fun of ballet dancers again!"

"T stands for a lot of things, but it sure don't stand for Twirly-Toes!"

*as someone rolls past him while he tries to drum up business* "That's a stop sign there, fool!"

"Well, I was soaking, but what I was soaking in was trust. And that bucket on my head? Was a bucket of joy."

*on the activities leading up to the recital* "Ticket sellin'! Hair gellin'! Table movin'! Tutu smoothin'!'

Next week: T has to issue some smackdown on unruly kids. Pity!