TVSquad

I wasn't around when the original Star Trek premiered on September 8th, 1966; I was but a fleeting thought to my parents. However, I did watch plenty of the series as it ran over-and-over again in syndication. As I got older I noticed that the show wasn't just entertainment, but a teaching tool as well. So, in honor of this breakthrough science-fiction show's 40th (!) anniversary, I present to you the five things I personally learned from Star Trek (not what I learned from All I Really Need to Know I Learned from Watching Star Trek, written by Dave Marinaccio.).

Alien babes are hot (and apparently easy): They're also extremely warm all of the time, because they barely wear any clothing. I guess there weren't any Puritans that landed on other planets in this galaxy (the only place they landed was at Plymouth Rock. Thanks alot, guys!). Maybe it was due to the era that the show was broadcast in, but it seemed like Captain Kirk was getting a little sumthin' sumthin' every episode. Didn't he ever think he could get Venutian VD, or Klingon Clap? Not very smart for a starship captain.

Those space-age fabrics are awfully flimsy: Every time James T. Kirk would get into a tussle his shirt would rip. Other crew members would get into fights, and their tunics would stay together without even a loose thread. So, the question that comes to mind is: who was Kirk's fashion consultant? Whoever it was they certainly weren't dressing him in sturdy, modern day fabrics that would withstand the constant pressures of a captain who would fight anything that was breathing.

Never wear a red shirt. EVER!: In the three seasons that Star Trek ran there were 28 deaths of red-shirted crewmen. Nineteen of them perished in the second season alone! Don't you think they would learn after the fifth or sixth red shirt security or engineering crew member got killed on an alien planet by a bat-like thing that sucked out their brains? I'm surprised those crew members weren't paying cadets on tour of duty with the Enterprise to switch tunics with them. Luckily, by the time the second Star Trek movie came out everyone wore red. So, the deaths were a little more spread out.

Don't mess around with the time travel: As has been mentioned before, you don't pull on Superman's cape; you don't spit into the wind; you don't pull the mast mask off the ol' Lone Ranger; and you don't mess around with the timeline. Look what happened during the three times (during the series) that the Enterprise went into Earth's past. First, they rescue an Air Force pilot and can't return him without changing history. Then, Kirk saves a woman (whom he falls in love with) and has to watch her die in order for the Nazi's not to take over the world. Then, Kirk and Spock nearly bring the world to nuclear war after capturing another person from their time who is trying to prevent such a thing. Stay in the present . . . it's much safer.

And finally . . .

For Heaven's sake, don't feed Tribbles!: Those buggers reproduce quicker than the Duggards. Pet them, tickle them, let them soothe you into a calm stupor, but don't give them anything to eat. You do that and the next thing you know your garage is full of them! Then, you need to find a Klingon ship to get rid of them all. And, you know how expensive that is with transporter prices the way they are!

Happy 40th Anniversary Star Trek! May you live long and prosper for many more years.