TVSquad

"Mess O' Potamia": The president of Iraq announced that he planned to have the US troops ready to leave by the end of the year. For those of you that need a reminder, that means by December 31. Jon made a slightly more reasonable assessment in saying the date is more likely to be the 12th of Nevur. Tourism in Iraq isn't exactly booming either. The new ads for Kurdistan's tourism industry aren't as appealing as they make themselves up to be. "The Other Iraq"? Well, I know where I want to go for my next Spring Break.

The Army is so desperate for new recruits that they've actually resorted to raising the maximum age to 42 ("Join the Army and spend your mid-life crisis in a real-life crisis"). They're even looking outside of the States, offering citizenship as an incentive to join. TDS had a few fake Army ads to share. They were pretty funny, but the one that almost made me spit out my drink was the "U.S. ARMY PROTECT YOUR FOREHEAD" one, a reference to those outrageously irritating "HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD" commercials. Ahhhh. I fucking hate those.

The news networks are getting a little Apocalypse-happy, talking about the war's relation to the prophesied end of days. There's a freaking Rapture Index on the Internet?! I Googled that as soon as Paula Zahn said it and yeah... it's really there. Amazing. Fun Fact: Jon's "stupid person" voice sounds remarkably like the love child of Adam Sandler and Jerry Lewis.

The night's guest was Danny DeVito from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Y'know, Sunny is one of those things that I always tell myself to start watching, but I never get around to it. It always looks extremely funny and DeVito sounded so excited that he's part of the cast. When he wasn't talking about how much he loved TDS (and Jon, who worked with him in Death to Smoochy), he was happily jabbering on about Sunny. His wild enthusiasm was definitely infectious. I think I'm really going to have to force myself to remember to catch an episode.

Jon/Stephen: Stephen Colbert is to host a celebrity tennis tournament to benefit... himself. Moment of Zen: Sam Donaldson asked Bush what he thought about the Mel Gibson situation. And then Bush called Donaldson a has-been.