There are many game shows (several of which are now defunct but still have a precious spot in my childhood memories) that I would love to participate in, simply because I know I would totally dominate. After repeated viewings, carefully studying strategies, and setting up make-shift labyrinths of pillows and cushions in my living room to practice, I have no doubt I would emerge the winner in absolutely all of these game shows, given the chance to play. These, ladies and gentlemen, are the game shows I would rock.Legends of the Hidden Temple: When I was a little kid, there was something utterly fascinating about this show. Perhaps I was amazed that they managed to get a rock formation to move (Olmec didn't do much, but he was pretty awesome). The questions were fairly easy (basic history, most of the time), so the kids usually swept through that. However, the challenge in the temple itself always pissed me off because the kids would never assemble that stupid monkey correctly. It was three pieces! Throw down the bottom, middle, top! It wasn't a flippin' Rubik's Cube. Forget that, man. I'm fully confident that I would have torn through that place in record time like a hurricane... without a mouthguard. The show ended many years ago, but the legend lives on... There are t-shirts available for purchase (the site's down for renovations at the moment, I think). Buy your favorite team's shirt, throw on some khaki shorts, and rock the look.
Nick Arcade: First off, this show blew my mind when I was a five year-old. This might have been due to the fact the show was the first to regularly mix live action and animation with a blue screen. I didn't really care for the prizes (a trip to Universal Studios Florida doesn't mean much to a kid that lives about an hour away from it)... I just wanted to be able to jump into a video game and play it for real. Actually, I still think about that every time I settle down for a game of "Tekken 2".
Supermarket Sweep: There is something about ripping apart supermarket shelves that looks surprisingly exhilariting. Actually, I've always secretly fantasized about running through a grocery store, weilding two carts, and frantically grabbing things that I don't need (like, approximately twenty pounds of poultry and five wheels of expensive cheese). Nothing particularly sophisticated or brilliant about this show... I just know that my shopping partner and I would have totally rocked in our matching polos.
GUTS (hosted by Yes, Dear's Mike O'Malley): "D-d-do you have it?" Yes. Yes, I did. And, in my younger years, I would have totally dominated all those games, powered only by Pixi Stix and sheer determination. I mean, the Aggro Crag was every ten year-old's equivalent Everest. Actually, in some ways, it was better, because climbing Everest doesn't win you a glowy rock. Global GUTS, the re-worked version of the show that included kids from all around the world, took the challenges even further. The winner got to wear his or her country's flag and run around the track like an Olympic champion, in addition to obnoxiously making pompous gestures at the camera. I would have done that "obnoxious American athlete" thing so well. "Take that, Commonwealth of Independent States! U-S-A! U-S-A!"
The Price is Right: This is the slight exception in my list. I'm not sure I could win as a contestant on this show because too much relies on luck. Plus, I don't like most of the games (that damn yodeling one kills me), I don't like most of the contestants (especially the Contestants' Row jerks), and I don't like most of the prizes (why bother getting my hopes up for a car if I'm probably going to end up with a dinette set?). All in all, I'd be a pretty hateful contestant. I don't deal well with happy, excited people. The only reason I want to go on the show is 'cause I want to play Plinko. Just Plinko. I can deal with not spinning the Wheel of Death, but I want to play Plinko.
TV Squad Ten: Top Ten ESPN shows from worst to first
Andy Richter: The TV Squad Interview
Have any questions for Vik Sahay of Chuck? Ask them here!
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
6-21-2006 @ 9:58AM
Missy said...
Great post! Both Legends of the Hidden Temple and GUTS can be seen in all their re-run glory on the Nick Gas channel. Hidden Temple alone provides hours of enjoyment watching clumsy kids try to navigate the challenges and The Temple. The spastic kids they chose to be contestants on that show give confidence to most viewers that they could have done it better.
Supermarket Sweep is a gem too. I think someone could make a lot of money by setting up a fake grocery store and letting people tear through it like on the show. It just looks like so much fun. There used to be some similar thing on TV years ago where kids got to do the same thing in a toy store. That seemed like a dream!
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 10:03AM
Brent said...
The toy store thing was a contest that Nickoloden would run twice a year. You could send in a max of 6 entries per household per day if I remember what I did back then for it. Never got on, but that would have been cool.
Two shows I would to the list are Double Dare. Answer a bunch of questions, then tear through the slime course. Awesome.
Family Fued is the other one I know I could rock. We (my family) used to watch it together and come up with all the answers.
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 11:16AM
Lee said...
omg, this is so strange. Over the past two days ive only been talking about shows and games from when i was younger. ^ Most def @ Double Dare...i remember watching that everyday lol. Annie you should do the five cartoons/animated shows from when you were younger.
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 12:13PM
tr said...
the problem with LotHT was the challenge at the end. i watch this show regularly (thanks nick GAS!), and the kids on there have NO CLUE where the hell they are going. "you can go up the ladder, or go straight, but watch out for the temple guards, or he'll take you necklace!" what the hell is that? so some dude is going to pop out of nowhere, and take my necklace? and then the other person has to follow the same path you took? i've always felt bad for the contestants, because it's almost like no one ever won the challenge.
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 1:01PM
Etana said...
Ahhh. the good old days of Nickoloden gameshows. Those were the best, even if the prizes sucked. Legends of the Hidden Temple had somoe element of secrecy to it, though, in essence, it was just a stupid game with complicated termonology. However, I think your list is lacking one key gameshow - Double Dare. The Family Fued for a younger generation, with an added bonus of slime! What could be better?
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 1:23PM
gwangi said...
What no American Gladiators?
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 2:00PM
Bex said...
Pretty great list! I think the one missing that is one of my faves (but probably before your time) was Finders Keepers also on Nick in the late 80's. They rerun it on GAS. Definitely worth checking out for the 80's cheese and simplicity of style.
And to add to Supermarket Sweep would have been the old Shop Til You Drop which followed it. A lovely little Lifetime duo. The old one was way better than this new one which for some reason takes place in a Costco. Huh?
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 2:05PM
Jay said...
I gotta agree and say Double Dare should have been on this list. Thats the first thing I thought of when I saw the post and was surprised when I saw Price is Right. I loved those Physical Challenges!
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 4:03PM
Brent said...
6. What no American Gladiators?
Posted at 1:23PM on Jun 21st 2006 by gwangi
The post was title five shows I would rock at. American Gladiators while it would have been cool, I would not have rocked :P
Reply
6-21-2006 @ 9:55PM
Rick said...
You know, in LoTHT, they're are all those contestants that get whatever they are supposed to get, all of the doors unlock and you would figure that they would sprint right?? WRONG!! Some of those stupid kids sit there and DO THE DAMN PUZZLES!! UUURRRGGGH!! I still watch that show and freaking yell at the TV like crazy!!!!
Reply
6-22-2006 @ 12:09PM
Preston said...
I would get on Price Is Right if I had to, but can't. They would use much different prizes than what I'd see now on TV. That's the trick-- those producers will trick you to think that you're better winning the games at home than the contestants on TV. So they'll one up on you and challenge you with other prizes and cars. I'd love to play the car games.
Reply
6-22-2006 @ 1:27PM
Liz said...
First of all, there is a strategy to the Temple. If the object you are suppossed to retrieve is in the 3rd room on the bottom level, the player must start on the top level to avoid temple guards. Do you think Omec is going to just hand you that 25 dollar savings bond? NO! These players continue to make me yell at the TV 15 years later. C'mon kids...are you that naive? There is going to be at least one temple guard either on the cliffs in the beginning or in the ball pit. It's not rocket science, this game is not that difficult. Day after day I watch another stupid set of tween's fail and only get a lifetime supply of Hershey's syrup or whatever that lame prize was. I agree with the above comments, I would personally rock that temple and blaze through there taking no prisoners. Also, quick fact: did you know Kirk Fogg's entrance was taped and replayed for every show? I thought I read that somewhere.
Reply
6-24-2006 @ 3:18AM
Jason Anderson said...
Remember "Finder's Keepers"? Man that was awesome. Or "Make the Grade", "Nick Arcade" and "Get the Picture". (O'Malley again. Or originally.) Man those shows were awesome.
Reply
6-28-2006 @ 9:35AM
Trevor said...
hey :)
I got to figuring it up the other day, and most of the kids on LotHT (Legends of the Hidden Temple) would be about 25 today (gosh, how time flies) I wonder if any of those contestants ever see the re-run (on Nick GAS( of LotHT and say something like "I was THAT dumb back then?!!"
Reply
7-14-2006 @ 3:38AM
Christi said...
I enjoyed reading all these posts. I am writing this while watching "Get the Picture". One of the prizes is a ... TYPEWRITER... OOOH!
I wonder if any kid ever wet their pants when the temple guards came out in LotHT. Even as a viewer, when they'd come out, it kind of freaked me out.
Reply
7-14-2006 @ 3:58PM
Strawberrymoon said...
OMG !!! haha I remeber I would never miss them ... so much memories .. you missed Double Dare and this other game show at nickelodeon that at the end they would make people show their hidden talent .. supermarket sweep geez I wouldve loved to be in that show ,once I tired doing it at my father's grocery store lol that was just too fun!
Reply