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(S01E03) Forget the werewolves, the green bugs, the camoflauge forest-dwellers, the inbred pig people and the aliens. You, Eugene Tooms, are the scariest monster ever to grace The X-Files.

Squeeze is the first MOTW (Monster of the Week) episode of The X-Files and it's a doozy. The writers take us off the government-covers- up-aliens-on-earth storyline and focus on a major freak who has ten-inch long fingers and rips the livers out of five victims every 30 years. The experts at The X-Files wiki say FOX requested the script change-up away from aliens. Apparently, the idea came when one of the writers saw an air duct outside their office and wondered whether someone could sneak up inside it. Tooms' obsession with liver came from creator Chris Carter's recent trip to France where he ate a lot of foie gras. That, and the liver is just a funny organ.We also get a little more of Scully's personal storyline. She's struggling with playing on Team Mulder while remaining a legitimate FBI agent in the eyes of her colleagues. Her loyalty is stronger than her pride, though, and she threatens a friend's career when he tries to block The X-Files investigation of his case.

Anyway, Eugene Tooms is a freak of evolution. It's not just the fact that he can scale walls like Spider-Man and stretch like Gumby, he also has a super spooky personality. He barely speaks and he moves deliberately and slowly. He's dirty and sweaty. His eyes turn green when he's low on liver. Watching Eugene Tooms makes me eye the vents and the fireplace in my home. I suppose he's meant to be ironic, in a way. All the other agents are calling Mulder 'Spooky' in this episode, but we know who the real spook is.

Mulder and Scully seek help from the investigator on a Tooms murder case from 30 years earlier. He has a lame monologue where he compares Tooms' evil to the Nazis and genocide. He thinks Toombs is simply a bad dude who learned to steal livers from bodies. But Mulder knows differently. He knows that sometimes evolution creates a genetic mutant.

The agents go to Tooms' nest in his old apartment where they find his nest made of papier mache and bile. As they're leaving, Tooms takes Scully's necklace and then follows her home. This is the first, but not the last time that a suspect will target the beautiful Miss Dana Scully. What creeps me out the most about this episode is the way that Tooms can break in to homes that seem to be secure. He squeezes into the air vents in Scully's apartment and attacks her. Mulder arrives just in time to save her (and her liver) and they arrest Tooms, who ends up in a mental institution. But, guess what? He'll be ba-ack.

This episode has the best line ever in The X-Files: When Mulder gets bile on his hand he says, "Is there any way I can get it off my fingers quickly without betraying my cool exterior?"