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American Idol: Lisa had a bad day

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Daniel Powter probably didn't mean for it to happen, but "Bad Day" will forever be burned into my memory as the American Idol reject song. It has definitely secured its symbolic connotation with being eliminated in my mind. I actually heard it on the radio today, and for a moment, I had a passing sensation that I might get fired when I arrived to work. But I didn't get fired...

Lisa got fired. I'm sorta bummed for her, but we saw it coming. She had been in the bottom three for the past few weeks. If Kevin didn't suck so bad, it probably would have been her last week. When I first saw Lisa during audition week, I actually thought she could make it to the final three, but she just never improved upon that first audition. I don't really feel sorry for her though. I mean, she's still a teen and she's already been on Broadway. Her and Ayla Brown are both in the "forever doin' just fine" club. So, I don't feel too sorry for them.

Ace Young and Katharine McPhee were also in the bottom three...

Nobody was too surprised about Ace, but Katharine's loser status got boos from the audience. And once again, Paula reminded us that it was all our faults for not sitting with the phone on redial for two hours in order to prove we had the McPheever. And so once again, I'll remind Paula to kiss my grits.

I thought Shakira and Wyclef sounded pretty good. Well, I thought Wyclef sounded good. I couldn't really hear Shakira with Wyclef's mic turned up to 11. But...were they lip-synching? Heck yeah, they were. At least Wyclef was, and he was doing it just a mere 5 inches from Simon's face. After Ashlee Simpson, I still can't believe that artists are still lip-synching. If you can't sing live, then just don't sing at all. I would have been perfectly content with simply watching Shakira belly dance for 6 minutes.

Finally, let's briefly discuss the patented Ace Sexy Stare. Now, a few of you commenters have noted that The Ace Sexy Stare plausibly makes cameo appearances outside of the American Idol stage. I'm not going to be as graphic as you commenters (mostly because I'm not allowed to), but let's just say when The Ace Sexy Stare does make an off-stage appearance, it seldom is a face-to-face one. A good point. But, I'm going to have to respectfully disagree. You know who else has a similar Sexy Stare? Paris Hilton. Yup, and she uses it at every possible photo op, and you would think that she'd also use The Sexy Stare in intimate situations. But nope. We've seen the video, and we know otherwise. Thus, I'm hypothesizing that The Sexy Stare is used purely for business purposes only. I believe that if you use The Sexy Stare outside of business, you weaken its powers. Now, I don't know this for certain. None of us do. Really, there is only one way to know for certain, and I will be the first one to volunteer for that experiment. I'm not afraid to do a little "research" in order to nail down the facts about Ace.

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