Two men enter.
One man leaves.
If you've ever watched Bill O'Reilly and thought you could stand your ground in an argument against the popular news analyst, then this is your chance. As a stunt for February sweeps, O'Reilly will choose six average people to come on his show and debate him on any topic. Starting today you can submit your topic to O'Reilly through e-mail. O'Reilly is obviously being more than a little tongue-and-cheek with the contest, dubbing it "Bloviating with Bill." Since I'm a lover and not a fighter I won't be attempting to faceoff with Bill, but if you do decide to take the man on, here's some suggestions:
- Wear loose clothing. This will allow you freedom of movement that O'Reilly lacks due to the constrictive suits he wears. If he lunges, you should be able to easily step out of the way.
- Make yourself look big. Remember, Bill's gargantuan height often intimidates his guests. You can counter this by stretching your arms out and sitting up as tall as you possibly can:
Bill: I can't believe you don't believe Cindy Sheehan isn't a pawn of the far left!
You: Ooooo! I'm big! Very big!
- Also, you might want to try rattling pots and pans.
- Play dead. This is really a last resort, but if his prowess for arguing overwhelms you, there's nothing wrong with going limp. In most cases he'll do nothing more than gently paw at you until giving up and walking away.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
1-17-2006 @ 2:43PM
Rachel said...
He wants to challenge me? I challenge him to make me interested. God... talk about milking the 15 minutes.
Reply
1-17-2006 @ 2:48PM
Justin said...
Debate:
You: I think that ...
Bill: BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
Reply
1-17-2006 @ 3:53PM
Dave said...
"Tongue-and-cheek" Really? Seriously? Is there no editing/spell/grammar checking at TV Squad?
Reply
1-17-2006 @ 4:16PM
Canton said...
Average people. Right. Watch him choose the craziest nuts available. (Yes, there are nuts on all sides, right, left, green and indie. The righties just seem to get the most airtime.)
Reply
1-17-2006 @ 5:39PM
R-Bro said...
Can I punch him in the face instead?
Reply
1-18-2006 @ 10:58AM
Leslie said...
Challenge him - why bother, he's so biased to begin with, what's to challenge. You might as well argue with lint!
Reply
1-18-2006 @ 11:36AM
Allan Davis said...
I'm probably better at arguing than at debating. But make no mistake O'Reilly is the Best!
Reply
1-19-2006 @ 6:41AM
Linda Valerio said...
If you can keep him on the subject being discussed. Bill is very good at making you think, your on one subject. Then does an abrupt divert to a completely different point, being discussed. Example: He'll invite somebody on the show, on the pretense that a particular subject will be discussed. Lets say, on a soldier being charged with a bogus crime. He'll ask his guest one question on the subject, and almost before the guest completes the answer. He will then like a animal hunting his prey, jump down the guests throat. With a totally surprising diverting questing. Well didn't you vote against giving anything to the soldiers. Which is really why he had the guest on to begin with. SABOTAGE. O'reilly is great at this. He's about as trustworthy, as a salesman trying to sell something, they know doesn't exit!
Reply